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Cut and paste from this article: People ghost for reasons of fear, anxiety, fear of hurting someone, fear of conflict, fear that they will succumb to "pressure" and say yes to another date that they do not want.
This is ridiculous. Were people always that way, is that a cultural thing??
What about just growing some balls and say, no thank you, I would like to move on and not with you in any way. It was nice getting to know you, I wish you all the best. DONE. Is this really THAT DIFFICULT?
Some people have always been that way, but for some reason, there seems to be this push to normalize this sort of behavior and trying to find excuses for what, in that absence of dealing with the occasional psycho or person who won't take "no" for an answer, is poor social form.
It's really not that difficult to simply tell someone that you no longer wish to be friends and maintain contact after a breakup (or simply decide that you don't wish to see someone any longer after a few dates). Ghosting is juvenile and hurtful and, as you wrote, rather ball-less.
Cut and paste from this article: People ghost for reasons of fear, anxiety, fear of hurting someone, fear of conflict, fear that they will succumb to "pressure" and say yes to another date that they do not want.
This is ridiculous. Were people always that way, is that a cultural thing??
What about just growing some balls and say, no thank you, I would like to move on and not with you in any way. It was nice getting to know you, I wish you all the best. DONE. Is this really THAT DIFFICULT?
Agreed. That’s ultimately what works best. Once in awhile the other person keeps trying to connect though. I answered my phone this weekend and I didn’t recognize the number. It was just a song: Before You Go. Sad, and yet slightly creepy, because who has that much emotion about me, yet I don’t immediately know who it is?
Someone once told me, “if this doesn’t work out, I’ll probably block you, that’s just how I am.”
I don’t find that offensive at all. People do what they have to do.
After dating a girl for almost six months , I (F) got broken up in a very humiliating way. In the midst of emotions I told her that I wanted to stay friends. We stayed in contact , still exchanging lengthy texts about our lives.
However , I am at a point where I really regret this decision and have no desire to stay in contact with her anymore. How do I that without totally ghosting her or being upfront about it since I was the first person to want to remain friends?
Also , when discussing the breakup I mentioned crying one time when we were together because she disappeared one week (yeah I know I shouldn't have told her about it). I don't know why but every time she gets busy she sends me now a text telling me that she won't be responsive for a few days.
It makes me feel like I'm some sort of nutcase in her eyes.
Thanks a lot!
There is absolutely nothing worse than someone who no longer wants to be involved with you romantically, but won't leave you alone.
Only one way to end a relationship, and that's with a clean break. Be polite, be civil, but be firm. Otherwise, all you do is prolong the agony both in your partner and yourself.
So here's what you do. Simply tell her, "You know, I thought being platonic would work, but it doesn't. So I need to call it quits with you. I hope you understand." Then block her calls.
After dating a girl for almost six months , I (F) got broken up in a very humiliating way. In the midst of emotions I told her that I wanted to stay friends. We stayed in contact , still exchanging lengthy texts about our lives.
However , I am at a point where I really regret this decision and have no desire to stay in contact with her anymore. How do I that without totally ghosting her or being upfront about it since I was the first person to want to remain friends?
Also , when discussing the breakup I mentioned crying one time when we were together because she disappeared one week (yeah I know I shouldn't have told her about it). I don't know why but every time she gets busy she sends me now a text telling me that she won't be responsive for a few days.
It makes me feel like I'm some sort of nutcase in her eyes.
Thanks a lot!
It's easy don't send any more texts don't make any phone calls don't contact her. Doesn't sound like you're that good of friends. If you don't want to stay in contact then don't you're not dating her you don't know where an explanation.
This confuses the heck outa me. You don’t want to talk to someone again, and you’re afraid if you simply stop talking to them… I got lost at this point…
There is absolutely nothing worse than someone who no longer wants to be involved with you romantically, but won't leave you alone.
Only one way to end a relationship, and that's with a clean break. Be polite, be civil, but be firm. Otherwise, all you do is prolong the agony both in your partner and yourself.
So here's what you do. Simply tell her, "You know, I thought being platonic would work, but it doesn't. So I need to call it quits with you. I hope you understand." Then block her calls.
Thank you for the relationship we shared and the friendship that followed. I am grateful for the time we had together and have decided to move forward alone. Thank you for understanding, and best of luck to you.
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