How to completely cut contact after deciding to stay friends?

[Bootsamillion]

Originally Posted by zrlos

Hello everyone,

After dating a girl for almost six months , I (F) got broken up in a very humiliating way. In the midst of emotions I told her that I wanted to stay friends. We stayed in contact , still exchanging lengthy texts about our lives.

However , I am at a point where I really regret this decision and have no desire to stay in contact with her anymore. How do I that without totally ghosting her or being upfront about it since I was the first person to want to remain friends?

Also , when discussing the breakup I mentioned crying one time when we were together because she disappeared one week (yeah I know I shouldn't have told her about it). I don't know why but every time she gets busy she sends me now a text telling me that she won't be responsive for a few days.
It makes me feel like I'm some sort of nutcase in her eyes.

Thanks a lot!

Just because you wanted to stay friends doesn't mean that you have to. Most people in the midst of a breakup will say or do anything to avoid at least some of the heartache they know is ahead of them. However, when we stay friends and still care, it makes our lives very sad and unhealthy, especially if the other one is moving on. A common mistake, very easily rectified. Don't worry about who said or did what, just move on and don't tell her. Ignore her texts and reply every once in a while and things will die out on their own. She will know you are moving on and you will have done a very healthy thing for yourself.

[zrlos]

Thanks everyone for the advice!

[Hankrigby]

Originally Posted by zrlos

Thanks everyone for the advice!

I hope you have it figured out at least to the degree you need it and I wish you the best.

[RandyHS]

I was in a similar situation. I was friends with this lady for years and I developed feelings for her. She did not return those feelings. At first, to keep the friendship going I tried to ignore my feelings, but it quickly became obvious this wouldn't work, so I ended the friendship and cut off all contact with her. It wasn't easy, but I had to do it for my own peace of mind.