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Old 12-17-2008, 11:20 PM
 
Location: In my view finder.....
8,515 posts, read 16,184,600 times
Reputation: 8079

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I ask for women over 40 because they have been around long enough to answer this question realisitcally and honestly.


This does not apply to all but moreso in a general sense. I have observed that younger women 18 up to mid to late thirties are somewhat very concerned about their outter appearance, mainly how cute they are.

I notice this more with women in their 20's. It seems that looks are everything or just about everything. NO, I am not saying looks are not important because they are. What I am saying is, it seems to be much more emphasis at 20 than it is at 40.


I notice this at the gym. It seems like the 20 somethings are looking around to see who's looking and the 40 somethings are more focused on their workout and leaving. I notice the 20 somethings are the ones eating up all the attention they get from the male gym staff but the 40 somethings seem to not be phased by it, again focusing on their workout . This is just one example.

I also notice women that are over 40, IMO, really have a great understanding of what being sexy is. I think the 20 year olds confuse sluty with being sexy.

So my question is, how have you changed in the way you view yourself and how important your looks are?


I know looks are important but what I am saying is, at 40 you're probably more concenred with being a more quality person moreso than some young attention seeker.

Thanks for reading
Ron
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Old 12-17-2008, 11:26 PM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,639 posts, read 41,038,202 times
Reputation: 13472
I'm over 40, but I'm probably somewhat the opposite of what you've described. I am pretty vain about my appearance, but I kind of have to be. I compete in ballroom dance and I have to look good. Ballroom dance comps are somewhat like beauty pageants.

Now, on weekends when I want to sleep in and just roll out of bed and go out and do things, I won't waste time slapping on a bunch of makeup and stuff. I just want to hurry up and leave.

When I'm at the gym, I am there to work out. I am not there to socialize or to make sure the guys notice me. Again, it's the gym and I don't wear makeup so I don't expect a lot of guys are really checking me out.

I do care that I am a quality person and not a shallow person. I've taken the time to become educated and I am also a compassionate, caring person. But, I still want to look the very best I can - while I still can.

Oh, and to answer your original question - yes, I have changed somewhat. In my 20's I would never leave the house without makeup and having my hair just right. I mean, I wouldn't even go outside to get the mail unless I had my "look" together. Now, at 44, I really don't care because i know that when I do get all gussied up, I look good.
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Old 12-17-2008, 11:30 PM
 
Location: In my view finder.....
8,515 posts, read 16,184,600 times
Reputation: 8079
If you compete in ballroom dances I can understnad that, that's an exception to the rule and the rule does not apply.

The rest of your answer is great.

Ron


Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes View Post
I'm over 40, but I'm probably somewhat the opposite of what you've described. I am pretty vain about my appearance, but I kind of have to be. I compete in ballroom dance and I have to look good. Ballroom dance comps are somewhat like beauty pageants.

Now, on weekends when I want to sleep in and just roll out of bed and go out and do things, I won't waste time slapping on a bunch of makeup and stuff. I just want to hurry up and leave.

When I'm at the gym, I am there to work out. I am not there to socialize or to make sure the guys notice me. Again, it's the gym and I don't wear makeup so I don't expect a lot of guys are really checking me out.

I do care that I am a quality person and not a shallow person. I've taken the time to become educated and I am also a compassionate, caring person. But, I still want to look the very best I can - while I still can.

Oh, and to answer your original question - yes, I have changed somewhat. In my 20's I would never leave the house without makeup and having my hair just right. I mean, I wouldn't even go outside to get the mail unless I had my "look" together. Now, at 44, I really don't care because i know that when I do get all gussied up, I look good.
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Old 12-17-2008, 11:30 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,005,830 times
Reputation: 9418
I think we're just as concerned about our looks--maybe moreso, we have to be--but we're more secure with ourselves in other ways we weren't in our 20s and 30s. But you're absolutely right about the difference between sleazy and sexy, I've noticed that too. Younger women seem to think sexy means showing it all whereas 40-somethings know more how and where to emphasize with class. But then, maybe I'm a little biased.
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Old 12-17-2008, 11:50 PM
 
9,912 posts, read 13,902,308 times
Reputation: 7330
I think I know stuff now that I didn't know when I was in my 20s and I'm far less concerned about what other people think of me.

I still like to dress up and keep myself neat and tidy, I love doing "girlie" things like having my toenails painted but I also figure people should take me as they find me. Trying to look gorgeous while I work out is so low on my priority list that it's practically non existent. I'm far less interested in people that are willing to judge me based on HOW I look. (Interestingly the less I worry about my outer appearance and just enjoy myself, participate in life, the more complimentary people seem to be. Just an observation. )

When I was younger that seemed really important, now I couldn't give two hoots.

Life is too short to be worrying about other people's perceptions (either correct or incorrect) of you. I have things to do, places to go, people to see, a life to be lived.
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Old 12-18-2008, 08:12 AM
 
Location: In the real world!
2,178 posts, read 9,578,191 times
Reputation: 2847
By the time I turned 40, I knew who I was, was proud of who I was and was happy with my place in life. I had accomplished many of my goals and didn't feel like I had to impress anybody. The one word I use to hear a lot was that I was "unique".. I was always the same... HAPPY! I did not wear make up all the time and many men told me I was still pretty without make up where some women look pretty with it and horriable without it.

I think in your 20's and 30's, you are trying to discover who you are and what/where your place in life is. By 40, you know and the inner beauty shows through.
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Old 12-18-2008, 08:57 AM
 
5,273 posts, read 14,545,143 times
Reputation: 5881
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ron. View Post
I ask for women over 40 because they have been around long enough to answer this question realisitcally and honestly.


This does not apply to all but moreso in a general sense. I have observed that younger women 18 up to mid to late thirties are somewhat very concerned about their outter appearance, mainly how cute they are.

I notice this more with women in their 20's. It seems that looks are everything or just about everything. NO, I am not saying looks are not important because they are. What I am saying is, it seems to be much more emphasis at 20 than it is at 40.


I notice this at the gym. It seems like the 20 somethings are looking around to see who's looking and the 40 somethings are more focused on their workout and leaving. I notice the 20 somethings are the ones eating up all the attention they get from the male gym staff but the 40 somethings seem to not be phased by it, again focusing on their workout . This is just one example.

I also notice women that are over 40, IMO, really have a great understanding of what being sexy is. I think the 20 year olds confuse sluty with being sexy.

So my question is, how have you changed in the way you view yourself and how important your looks are?

I know looks are important but what I am saying is, at 40 you're probably more concenred with being a more quality person moreso than some young attention seeker.

Thanks for reading
Ron

This question carries a lot of "gravity" with it.






Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh wow, I just HAD to say it.
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Old 12-18-2008, 11:22 AM
 
Location: Planet earth
434 posts, read 933,745 times
Reputation: 363
I am close enough to be 40, unfortunately

Younger girls are like flowers
We are like fossils
Which hold certain value and appeal to certain people
Only

Cheers!

Last edited by jinglebell; 12-18-2008 at 11:39 AM..
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Old 12-18-2008, 11:24 AM
 
Location: in purgurtory in London
3,722 posts, read 4,309,935 times
Reputation: 1292
I wear my age as a badge of honour.
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Old 12-18-2008, 11:36 AM
 
Location: Orlando
8,176 posts, read 18,537,395 times
Reputation: 49864
You'll find that most women over 40 have gotten to a point in life they know what they want and don't waste alot of time on "fluff"

While we still like to hear it once in a while, we know if we look good or not and don't need a male's approval.

We've learned not to sweat the small stuff. And yes, we're in the gym to look good, not to be looked at.

I'm 46 and have loved every bit of my 40's.
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