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"Communication" is a highly overrated BS! It's not like you don't comprehend what the other one is saying... you just can't imagine how he/she can possibly think and feel this way! No amount of rehashing it and rewording it is going to change THAT! It all comes down to compatibility in practical matters and similar wavelength in the abstract ones.
There is a difference between communication and talking just like there is a difference bewteen hearing and listening. Communication is not about simply saying words, it's about expressing how you feel. The comprehension and acceptance of the other person's feelings are a very important part of communication. And if you are listening, instead of dismissing because you don't like what's being said, you'll understand exactly why the person you are communicating with thinks and feels the way he/she does.
But that's just it. Many people DON'T express what they are feeling, or they let you ASSUME. So you may THINK you know, but you don't. And that is really a path to failure.
I'm not saying it's not needed at all. I just meant that no matter how well expressed an inconceivable to the other party thought is it's not gonna make any difference. You can talk till the cows come home and if it's unacceptable to the other one it remains unacceptable. You either can agree to disagree and live with it or you can't, depending on how important the issue is to you.
There is a difference between communication and talking just like there is a difference bewteen hearing and listening. Communication is not about simply saying words, it's about expressing how you feel. The comprehension and acceptance of the other person's feelings are a very important part of communication. And if you are listening, instead of dismissing because you don't like what's being said, you'll understand exactly why the person you are communicating with thinks and feels the way he/she does.
Exactly!!!
Acceptance! Wow... so many people are unwilling to accept things that are 'different' to them.
All this wonderful talk about communication. It's all BS. What about when someone asks you how you really feel, and you spill your guts out and they get all pissed off and immediately the ONLY course of action is "Well then, we need to go our separate ways if that's how you feel." No gray area, it's either black or white. Oh, and marriage counseling? Forget that! One party absolutely does not believe in it and will never, ever go. So, you go by yourself, spend a sh*tload of money - several thousand dollars - only to still be at square one. Yeah, communication, alright. Sorry, but it's a load of crap.
It kinda depends on the "things"... don't you think?
of course....
But, for example - I have a friend that dismisses her husbands feelings & comments about everything. She acts like he disgusts her. Its almost like she feels superior to him & everything she says & does is the 'right' way. She can't accept that he might feel differently than she does, so she just assumes he is wrong. I'm not sure if I am wording this to where you understand what I am saying.
All this wonderful talk about communication. It's all BS. What about when someone asks you how you really feel, and you spill your guts out and they get all pissed off and immediately the ONLY course of action is "Well then, we need to go our separate ways if that's how you feel." No gray area, it's either black or white. Oh, and marriage counseling? Forget that! One party absolutely does not believe in it and will never, ever go. So, you go by yourself, spend a sh*tload of money - several thousand dollars - only to still be at square one. Yeah, communication, alright. Sorry, but it's a load of crap.
It takes BOTH parties to communicate. You are right about that. If the other is close minded, there is no communication.
All this wonderful talk about communication. It's all BS. What about when someone asks you how you really feel, and you spill your guts out and they get all pissed off and immediately the ONLY course of action is "Well then, we need to go our separate ways if that's how you feel." No gray area, it's either black or white. Oh, and marriage counseling? Forget that! One party absolutely does not believe in it and will never, ever go. So, you go by yourself, spend a sh*tload of money - several thousand dollars - only to still be at square one. Yeah, communication, alright. Sorry, but it's a load of crap.
Ahh and now we see what the op is asking. How about the successful WAYS of communicating?
So, how to make it work and how to make it endure? That's what op seeks.
But, for example - I have a friend that dismisses her husbands feelings & comments about everything. She acts like he disgusts her. Its almost like she feels superior to him & everything she says & does is the 'right' way. She can't accept that he might feel differently than she does, so she just assumes he is wrong. I'm not sure if I am wording this to where you understand what I am saying.
Yes, I do understand. I feel the same way about many people. They simply shouldn't have gotten together. That's all.
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