Is anyone habitually L-A-T-E for everything?lol

[JoanD'Arc]

Originally Posted by Shannon10

I fixed this problem with my family. When I say we are eating at a certain time......we do. If they are late they get cold food and leftovers. It's funny how they started getting to things on time.

BRAVA! A woman with moxxie!

[Sprawling_Homeowner]

Originally Posted by coco29

This is funny because I am always late, my tags say "SoryImL8" I get up on time but by the time I get out of the house or wherever Im late. 2-3 hrs no but to a function maybe an hour, to work 15mins...I think the only reason why I havent been fired is because when I work, I work hard and make sure that I cross every t and dot every I before I leave no matter what the time. The reason why she may never make up an excuse is the same reason why i stopped doing that, because I was tired of making them up, there is no excuse oooh except I just move slow. Please realize that it takes 3 types of people to make the world go round...those who are early,on time and late. I have tried to be on time but 9 out of 10 my intense efforts does not work .

Assuming you're serious: this is absolutely nonsense.

Yours is a habit borne out of indiscipline, sloppiness, and a refusal to see that your lateness inconveniences others.

[Sprawling_Homeowner]

Originally Posted by mrstewart

We have a friend in our group of close friends that is constantly VERY late...30 minutes to up to 2 hours late! It has gotten so bad we lie about what time events start!

I know somebody like that.

I never call him anymore and my close-knit circle of friends all but "excommunicated" him. His habitual lateness was one of the reasons, but there were others.

[Sprawling_Homeowner]

Originally Posted by runrgirl

I am not late for work as they pay me to be there at a certain time. But... I hate time schedules terribly. If it is my day off I will not obligate to be on any time schedule. I detest family gatherings and scheduled parties on my days off. I like to go for all day hiking, running adventures or take naps or do whatever I feel like doing and on no ones schedule but mine, so I just will not commit. If I happen to get done early with whatever I decided to do when I got up on my day off maybe I'd show up but I refuse to have any type of time schedule for 2 days out of my week which is not unreasonable with a 5 day week work schedule. I mean enough of this having to be somewhere at a certain time-- I'll never do it on the weekends. I think it is rude to schedule something in the middle of the day on the weekend and expect people who work all week to plan their whole day around that. I just won't do it- EVER. Not on days off or holidays.

So if your friends are having a dinner at their house at 6PM on Saturday night and all other friends are not only attending, but they all arrive at 6PM, do you think it's acceptable and within the norms of social convention to arrive 1 or 2 hours late because it's your day off?

[Sprawling_Homeowner]

Originally Posted by mommax3plus2

imo - its how you are raised.

completely agree.

Two friends of mine ... well I lost touch with them over time, they are brothers. They were ALWAYS late, one hour or more sometimes. And ditto for some of their cousins whom I met through them.

I later learned through another friend who knew them and their family that those two guys' parents were always late too.

[amanda0808]

I have this problem a lot. for some reason I just can't stay on schedule

[Sprawling_Homeowner]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

EXACTLY. Short of actually striking someone or calling them a terrible name, being habitually late is about as rude as you can be. For time is the stuff life is made of, and being habitually late is the equivalent of saying, "I don't give a rip about other people's time. I am the center of the universe, and you must plan around me."

I concur.

Here on CD, I've written about friends/acquaintances whose chronic lateness irked me. I'll just write about "Bob."

1. Bob has, in recent years, been 30-60 minutes late to several meetings we scheduled. He never once apologized. One time, he was more than 2 hours late for the birthday dinner and hangout night of Steve, my best friend. In fact, he came only because we called him repeatedly. He came 1 hour after dinner was done.

2. In earlier times, when Bob and I were closer and I did not have a car, Bob often came to pick me up. Bob would tell me he'd be at my place by 6 or 7, and say, "be ready!" only to be 30-45 minutes late. I often stood outside, went back in after 10-15 minutes, and even just went back inside. I'd call him, and he would say, "I'm on my way" without even saying sorry for his lateness.

3. Bob vacationed w/ his wife, 2 children in a foreign country in 2005 - and along with him went John, as well as John's wife and two children. On the day both families were to return to the US, Bob was late in finishing his checking out of the hotel. John waited - and they missed their flight. Bob was... taking a shower. He didn't apologize (well he did but he didn't take the situation seriously, according to John).

4. In 2006, Kevin, someone Bob, Steve, John, and I all know from college (the 5 of us went to the same university; that is where we all met each other) got married. Steve and I weren't close to Kevin, but Bob was. In fact, of the 4 of us, Bob was closest to Kevin. Anyway, I didn't drive back then, and Bob offered to drive me. I politely declined - I already had plans to meet Steve (who has always had a car). I planned out a trip to Steve's town via public transportation. Steve picked me up promptly as planned, and we even had time for a quick snack before arriving, on time, at the wedding hall. Turns out we, and all other guests, had to wait 45 minutes as the staff had run into a major delay preparing the wedding. Eventually, the wedding started... and ended... and, no Bob. I called Bob, and Bob's polite but evidently flustered wife picked up Bob's cell. I encouraged them and told them to come. When they arrived, I noticed Bob's wife was embarrassed, but Bob wasn't. They missed the entire wedding even though it started almost 1 hour late! And to think I might've missed it also had I accepted Bob's offer of a ride.

This event didn't bother me directly, but it shows how clumsy and careless with time Bob can be.

5. Last year, the week before Steve's birthday, Bob and I spoke on the phone about an unrelated issue. When I told him that John and I were planning to take Steve out for his birthday on the coming weekend, Bob said, "why don't you invite me?" in a complainy, whiny tone. I told him an email would be sent out to all with all details. Bob seemed satisfied. But whereas Steve and John responded to the emails promptly, Bob never did. I had to call Bob on the dinner night, 90 minutes before the scheduled time of our meeting. Bob claimed he had no time for emails, and said he'd show up. Then, 30 minutes before the meeting, Bob called me to say he'd be late. Steve was w/ me by then, and it was Steve who answered, as I was in the shower. Steve and I were livid.

Needless to say, Steve no longer even considers Bob a friend, and I pursued Steve's path beginning last year. The accumulation of all of these and other gaffes by Bob showed me this wasn't a friendship worth keeping. And, this past weekend, even John, who has way more patience than Steve and I combined, told me he is going to have a private chat w/ Bob about Bob's lack of proactivity, lateness, and Bob's habit of not returning calls.

So to all of you chronically late arrivers - if your attitudes/behaviors resemble Bob's - don't be surprised when your friends begin to ditch you. Because surely, it's OK for YOU to make others plan their lives around YOU, right?