Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I don't want to hear about complex reasons. There is absolutely NO excuse for not leaving someone who physically abuses you. None! The first time some ape lays a finger on you, you should be out the door. No excuses!
Unless this ape holds on to the children if you leave. Unless this ape kills you if you leave (instead of just calling you a "ho"). Unless this ape rolls on the floor begging you to forgive him after every time he calls you a "ho". Unless this ape has friends (ahem) who will harass you if you leave their buddy. Unless she has been led to believe that she can never find better. The list can go on.
Again, you're equating my idea of respect with how 'easy' a woman is, or how willing she is to give her body to me.
If being "respectful" means giving you a "chance" because YOU want one, then yes -- "respect" is to be equated with how easy a woman is.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20
Rather presumptious on your part lumping me with with (in your mind) the vast majority of the male gender.
It doesn't describe the "vast majority of the male gender". But it does describe virtually every man who defines himself primarily as a "nice guy".
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20
It's probably so automatic to you.
Yes, Trimac, like all other people, I'm a boxed category.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20
The problem is that the 'nice' guys miss out, maybe that's back to the jungle again, the alpha males winning every thing, but it's more than that.
"Alpha males", like "nice guys", are invariably self-described. As far as I am concerned, both categories are losers, suffering from the same complexes, except so-called "alpha males" have slightly more intense delusions of grandeur. Again, this does not refer to the "vast majority of the male gender", but rather to its fringe. The idea of alpha males winning everything and "deserving" nice guys missing out completely is the core of masculist mythology, but it's just that -- mythology.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20
I suppose maybe most men don't deserve that much respect, and I am aware about how of them talk about women.
It's not "most" men that talk that way about women -- but again, you'll notice that the criticism of women (all women) on these boards is far more sweeping and vicious than the criticism of men.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20
What I'm talking about is more a modern thing, how women have set themselves on a pedestal. I don't expect you to truly be able to see it from the other side of the fence... I just wish more women were actually willing to truly go by someone for who they are, like I would. Many say they go for intellect etc, but those same ones are so particular about physical features.etc. But of course there are still some decent women out there, just less, I think.
Again, you are talking about women having relationships just for the asking as a sign of "respect". Here is the thing: a man with a powerful intellect and serious intellectual accomplishments will not describe himself primarily as a "nice guy". A person who is artistic and has a touch of genius will not describe himself primarily as a "nice guy". These men may be actually nice, but that's not, by far, the most prominent feature of their lives or personalities. If, on the other hand, a man defines himself as a "nice guy", it immediately signals to me that his biggest gift to humankind is his decent manners -- you know, something that's pretty much everyone ought to possess. Thus, when I hear "nice guy", I immediately think "mediocre". You probably resent women for finding "nice guys" boring -- except that "nice guys" ARE boring, because they are neither intellectual, nor artistic, nor (obviously) attractive. If the only thing you have to offer to a potential mate is the certainty that you won't hit or insult her, I daresay that's very little -- so instead of complaining about pedestals, perhaps you should think about elevating yourself to one. You know, if the mountain won't come to Mohammed ...
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,037,872 times
Reputation: 11862
^ When I talk about 'nice guys' that's not necessarily what I mean. I don't use it as a bargaining chip...I usually cite my other traits: my artistic tendencies, for example...I never go about saying 'I'm a nice guy, therefore you should give me a chance, and if you don't, you're being disrespectful' - I only expect some semblance of openness: not to be totally dismissed because of some silly imperfection. You try to respect them, take and interest etc, but in the end it don't make any difference...chivalry is out, if you don't have it, you can't 'woo' a girl: fair cop, but then what the hell can you do. Perhaps I am guilty of generalizing, acting like a substantial minority is the vast majority.
But yes, if I were a women there would be many men whom I would find boring or off-putting...Try being totally ignored, or sending messages to every girl on there because you have to on some stupid dating site with no luck whatsoever just because you're not that ideal, you're too young, short, wrong hair colour, wrong race even...your personality doesn't matter, they just want someone you don't have...That's fine, I suppose I'll have to live a lonely, bitter existence because I don't match up to their mystically lofty standards. I try to make friends.etc, but it seems these days nobody wants to know you, so I don't even get a proper shot. RESPECT in the sense of women being too superficial with regards to picking a partner, even going beyond nature, to the same extent and sometimes/often greater than men are towards women.
American women - from what I've seen in the media and heard, have been subliminally told by family members, society, the media, that Mr. Right has to be perfect in any way. If he makes one small false move - bam! 'you don't deserve that crap girlfriend, dump his ass!'
Very true. They hold men to unreasonably high standards.
On one hand they ***** about men who treat them badly, don't respect them - yet they still keep going back to them, because of looks, or whatever else.
While Mr. Average Joe they don't even give the time of day, when they realize they'd be happy if they just stopped being such stuck-up prudes.
But perhaps it's just nature, made even worse by a self-centered, superficial society.
They need Mr. Average Joe to pay the bills and give them the failytale life the media says they deserve (mainly for just waking up in the morning) whereas they have "fun" with bad boys.
They need Mr. Average Joe to pay the bills and give them the failytale life the media says they deserve (mainly for just waking up in the morning) whereas they have "fun" with bad boys.
Oh yay, yet another misogynist.
And this one is reviving multiple dead threads.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
here.
