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Anyone ever date someone who's good on paper (guy or girl) but there was no connection? The good on paper person supposedly has everything that a person is looking for, looks, smarts, personality, etc.
I'm dating someone who's great on paper, only there's no spark. Should i keep dating him in the hopes of sparks flying someday? I don't want to waste his or my time if it's not going to happen. Anyone ever in the same position? What did/would you do?
Yes, I married him. Big mistake.
Handsome, family oriented, worked full time while finishing his engineering degree, card carrying member of mensa, never got mad, never argued, interested in hobbies and activities. Not long after the marriage he couldnt keep a job, didnt want to live as a family as in sharing and doing things together. The silence turned to lack of communication. He became a lazy self centered, moody, depressed, lying, narcisistic alcoholic (gosh did I leave anything out). But he sure looked good on paper and appeared perfect to ppl that didnt know him yet. Of course we grew apart. I lost all respect for him. What I once saw as handsome became ugly, what was once passion turn to repulsion.
If I were you I would find the one that I could talk to and laugh with. The one that made me weak in the knees when we kissed. I would look at what is in his heart and soul and not what is on paper.
Anyone ever date someone who's good on paper (guy or girl) but there was no connection? The good on paper person supposedly has everything that a person is looking for, looks, smarts, personality, etc.
I'm dating someone who's great on paper, only there's no spark. Should i keep dating him in the hopes of sparks flying someday? I don't want to waste his or my time if it's not going to happen. Anyone ever in the same position? What did/would you do?
I experience this whenever I'm set up. The person doing the setting up will tell me about their friend. "This person is this, this, and that. You have this and this in common." It'll sound like a good fit and then you meet and no sparks.
I was just a "victim" of this(Just happening yesterday 5/28/09). I was dating a wonderful girl for about a year and 1/2. And out of nowhere she comes out saying "I'm not sure your the one." No other explanation, nothing.
Now, I've been blessed with a great number of friends. With them, I've come up with some theories. She is a few years younger than I am. Never been in a relationship this long, is studying to go back to school.... They all think, and I somewhat agree, that she's scared.
But then again, looking back, there were signs.. some conversations were quieter. Not too much, but more drinking involved, just to sleep with me.
To make things worse. I think I made things worse. We ended up chatting via online, not to mention, a third party, who is now, and probably recently, her confidant, was chatting with both of us. I know messages were being relayed back and forth, and I know were blurred. Because around the end of the conversation, keep in mind we were both obviously emotional, i was being accused of insinuating a more than friends relationship between the two of them... which i was not trying to do. Yes, I had my suspicions, but I never came out and said it to them last night. I feel like I burned what ever bridge was left to cross, in maybe fixing this...
I love her very much, she claims she really cares about me, and loves me... but I'm a complete mess.
Anyone have any input?
Anyone ever date someone who's good on paper (guy or girl) but there was no connection? The good on paper person supposedly has everything that a person is looking for, looks, smarts, personality, etc.
I'm dating someone who's great on paper, only there's no spark. Should i keep dating him in the hopes of sparks flying someday? I don't want to waste his or my time if it's not going to happen. Anyone ever in the same position? What did/would you do?
I was in this position before for 8 months. I tried, and tried, and tried, but after awhile, the little bit of sparks we did have in the beginning, faded out fast. I now realize that we're better off being 'cool'. Ya know, just being friends, than lovers.
I was in this position before for 8 months. I tried, and tried, and tried, but after awhile, the little bit of sparks we did have in the beginning, faded out fast. I now realize that we're better off being 'cool'. Ya know, just being friends, than lovers.
We've only been seeing each other 3 mos (long distance) and the spark that we had or that i thought we had just isn't there anymore. I feel as if he's coming on WAAAAY to strong w/o even really knowing me. Like i said before, we can't even have a comfortable conversation unless i'm talking 99% of the time. How can he already be infatuated if we don't know each other?
Oh, and I've found one reason can be that you are both too much alike, so it's boring. Another is simply a lack of spark, that x factor that can't be defined.
Oh, it can be defined quite easily. Nobody wants average. Women especially, they want to think they're getting a half-off sale at the shoe store with a guy, or a 2 for 1.
You have to come across to them as the right amount of cocky, refined, good looking, taboo, and risk-taking in an individual mix and match form to put across that your worthy of them.
This is why the bad boy image always thrives and why the average woman will date and cling to a guy that has nothing more going for him then an outgoing demeanor, on welfare, who stays out most nights with the boys.
We've only been seeing each other 3 mos (long distance) and the spark that we had or that i thought we had just isn't there anymore. I feel as if he's coming on WAAAAY to strong w/o even really knowing me. Like i said before, we can't even have a comfortable conversation unless i'm talking 99% of the time. How can he already be infatuated if we don't know each other?
He sounds THIRSTY. Any man who comes on that strong without even knowing you all like that is what I call T-H-I-R-S-T-Y, which is a TURN-OFF.
Tell him to go KICK ROCKS. I'm sorry, but I'll be 40 this year, and my patience for bullcrap is very low. I have no problem, at all, kickin' a man to the curb if I feel that he's wasting my valuable time and don't feel any spark. Life's too short.
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
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I think your analogy "Good on Paper" we have all been there at one point and done just that. If there is no fit no spark, none of that hit the homerun outta the park, fireworks in the sky, shooting stars sparkle in the eye.....let it go. Just about like finding those nice looking pants on the rack n tryin them on and lookin at yourself n sayin ...Oh, hell no
Anyone ever date someone who's good on paper (guy or girl) but there was no connection? The good on paper person supposedly has everything that a person is looking for, looks, smarts, personality, etc.
I'm dating someone who's great on paper, only there's no spark. Should i keep dating him in the hopes of sparks flying someday? I don't want to waste his or my time if it's not going to happen. Anyone ever in the same position? What did/would you do?
Sounds like relationships can be bought and traded on the stock exchange. Even futures are involved in it.
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