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its not that i have that high of standards...
i just dont want a drunk, a user, a gold digger, a psyco, unemployed, or some one with a house full of kids.
apparently in this day and age thats nearly impossible to find
While your thought does have some merit to it, the next person may be better in some areas and worse in others. Many times he/she may turn out to be worse than the previous one. Everybody has pros and cons and as cliche as it sounds, a perfect person doesn't exist. The trick is to find somebody having the most qualities important to you, to learn to live with their quirks, and to quit thinking somebody's grass is greener because it ain't! I know, easier said than done... I have a problem with the concept myself.
What would you consider high-standards and nit-picking? Just curious.
You are asking, but our answers may not be in line with yours. It is all in how you view it, yes?
To me, I am one of a dying breed. I have a lot to offer the right man; fidelity, honor, loyalty, intelligent conversation, comedy, a compassionate ear, alone time, an open mind, a clean home, great cooking and lots of "creativity". I'd say I am offering a lot more than most are capable nowadays. So, I know there is someone out there who will appreciate it.
I agree.
You rock. I agree 150%.
Dang it, I've got to get to these threads before Pass, she always posts what I want to say.
D size breasts or better.
Weigh no more than 125 lbs.
She has to look like Eva Mendes, etc.
Must be willing to obey any and all commands.
Women seeking men:
Must have:
A job making at least $250,000/yr.
An 8-inch unit
A BMW, Mercedes, or Lambo
Has to be buff with a 6-pack and at least 6'4"
It's very obvious you have NOT been reading the female posts on CD because the only we have ever required of men is that they have a job. We have never stated a specific amount, we dissed the car issue, and we raked women who dump guys with small ones over the coals. And we all agreed that a small pooch is okay and I don't think anyone had would reject a short man.
I think about this a lot. I think I give everyone I meet an honest assessment and adjust my standards a little each time. I've thought about dating someone who I wasn't physically that attracted to, but who was a very nice, decent person. I considered at least dating him and seeing if the attraction grew. As it turned out, he decided I wasn't religious enough since I wasn't willing to guarantee I could attend his church regularly (that I had yet to even try and wasn't familiar with) and opted to try to forge a relationship with a friend he'd known for six years. I would have dated a guy that happened to be a recovering alcoholic (not an issue for me, but something some people wouldn't consider, I guess) and who had some financial issues, but he wasn't over a past relationship. I've been willing to be in a long distance relationship, at least for a while and see where it goes, but that's something not many guys will even consider, not that I blame them.
I don't have a laundry list of expectations and dealbreakers. As long as the men are basically caring, decent people and there's some chemistry there, I try not to be too picky or let little things bother me. I feel like I might miss out on someone who turns out to be really great if I don't take the time to actually get to know them. You can't find out who people are on a couple dates. I know men can't figure me out on a couple dates either, but sometimes that's all the time you get.
But most times, it's not up to me to make that decision as to whether a relationship is possible or not. I'm pretty certain I can't have children without major fertility intervention and that crosses me off the list for a lot of guys. Most of the men who have asked me out in the last six months are between 35-40 and it doesn't seem to be my age so much that's a deterrent, as the doubt I could have a child. Even men in their late 40s, early 50s, who already have kids from a previous marriage still envision having another one in a new relationship.
There's no way I can guarantee this, no matter what method I were to try, and I'd be willing to try harvesting eggs or whatever might work. It's one of the reasons I stopped dating in my thirties; it was a built in dealbreaker for a lot of men, and the rejection just got to be too painful. If I didn't want kids, it wouldn't hurt so much, but I did want to have them. Even though it's not my fault, it makes me feel bad about myself sometimes. So even if I'm openminded and fairly accepting of men and some of their flaws, the fact that I'm "defective" in this area isn't something most guys are going to overlook. So I am being realistic about what I have to offer, but it can be a harsh reality sometimes.
I'm shocked to hear that most guys you've gone out with have been put off by the idea that you can't have children.
For me it's the exact opposite. Although I wouldn't MIND having kids...the truth is if I find out a woman is infertile for whatever reason, her attractiveness goes UP! What could possibly be better than having an SO who you can have completely unprotected sex with, not even so much as having her hormones screwed up by the pill...and have no fear of pregnancy?
My question...........are you being realistic about what it is you have to offer and what it is that you're looking for?
I find it's not so easy to find someone you really click with even when your standards are very flexible. All too often I find myself attracted to girls who aren't interested in me and vice versa.
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