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I was out with my buddies for a few drinks...During the conversation the topic of sexuality came up. One of the guys mentioned that he liked certain clothing on women and certain "discipline" games to be played on him. This is an otherwise good person (nothing criminal going on), it is just that it seems very unusual. I looked up "fetish" on wikipedia...I guess this is what you could call it...it does not draw a line between paraphillia and fetish. Also, I remember that stupid show "Manswers" claiming that the majority of men have a "fetish." I have heard of this before, but I used to think it was a perversion and only something that sick people do. You see, I want to consider myself a open-minded person, but in the back of my mind something is telling me that my friends is a little sick.
What I want to know is this...Am I being too judgemental? Like I said, I do not want to be a ignorant person...it took a while for me to no longer consider myself homophobic (I disowned a relative for years for being homosexual) ...but is behavior like his OK as long as it is not hurting someone? What do experts say? What is said in the DSM? How many men are involved in these activities?
I believe that everyone has certain "things" that turn them on more than others, and that's ok. BUT...I also believe that putting so much focus on attaining a certain type of sexual gratification is unhealthy, no matter how many willing partners you may find along the way. Once you identify your sexuality by a particular fetish I think it's just wierd.
What I want to know is this...Am I being too judgemental? Like I said, I do not want to be a ignorant person...How many men are involved in these activities?
I was out with my buddies for a few drinks...During the conversation the topic of sexuality came up. One of the guys mentioned that he liked certain clothing on women and certain "discipline" games to be played on him. This is an otherwise good person (nothing criminal going on), it is just that it seems very unusual. I looked up "fetish" on wikipedia...I guess this is what you could call it...it does not draw a line between paraphillia and fetish. Also, I remember that stupid show "Manswers" claiming that the majority of men have a "fetish." I have heard of this before, but I used to think it was a perversion and only something that sick people do. You see, I want to consider myself a open-minded person, but in the back of my mind something is telling me that my friends is a little sick.
What I want to know is this...Am I being too judgemental? Like I said, I do not want to be a ignorant person...it took a while for me to no longer consider myself homophobic (I disowned a relative for years for being homosexual) ...but is behavior like his OK as long as it is not hurting someone? What do experts say? What is said in the DSM? How many men are involved in these activities?
Hi lentzr,
I don't know for sure but it depends on what you see in yourself. I do see a lot of base drives that I otherwise contain and channel. Within me is anything from violence, gluttony, sexual excess perhaps even boarding on perversion. Why do people watch movies where people are in danger and they die? When ever anyone chooses to criticize God for making an evil world, I always make a point to mention every world of fantasy we make has villains and evil. Why not just make Star Wars without Darth Vader?
So what to do with them? Suppress them? Channel them? Act them out? Ignore them?
One thing that particularly disturbed me was when I discovered a primitive link between good and evil and how even the capacity to do good is only a slight perversion away from evil. Consider the hero with no disaster? Does the hero pine away for disaster? If the evil queen does not jeopardize the young maiden, the prince is indolent and unmoved to act. A blooming flower surrounded by menacing elements is that much more lovely of a flower. However then do we wish for the menace? Why do we have slasher movies where young women are in grave danger? Its a more acceptable perversion is it not? And is it also not true that this is the stage that arouses heroism?
So perhaps there is some visceral arousal when something of that sort is mixed with beauty. There is something arousing about dominance. The women in peril genre is particularly jolting to me where it seems my individualism is stripped away as the species recruits me to defend the reproductive bottleneck. Perhaps this kind of arousal is addictive and such a thing is artificially sought. I can see this going wrong into perversion , but I also see the need to confront these fears and feelings and somehow come to terms with them. Something perhaps to consider about your friend.
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
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Originally Posted by yankeegirl313
I wouldn`t say he is sick. Kinky, maybe, yes.
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Originally Posted by Thursday007
I draw the line at farm animals
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Originally Posted by GloryB
As long as someone finds a partner interested in the same thing.....it is all good.
Quote:
Originally Posted by yankeegirl313
Ahhh...yeah. I was gonna mention that one.
I see this peaked a spot in all your lil hearts...... bless you
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