U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 05-14-2007, 07:33 AM
 
15 posts, read 77,583 times
Reputation: 23

Advertisements

I have a few friends who go to Bars and are always picking up women.

One friend will pick up a different woman every Friday night. If he goes to a bar and does not pick up a woman that night he will feel like a failure. The funny thing is he sees the same people in the bar every weekend. If he sees someone he had picked up before he will act like they are invisible and he is only interested in someone he has not met before.

I ask him if he is ill at ease being so close physically and emotionally with someone he has never met. We all know how hard it is to talk to people we do not know well. Then it should be so much more difficult having sexual and romantic relations with someone who we do not really know.

Are you ill at ease the first time you try to get sexual or romantic with someone new?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-14-2007, 10:55 AM
 
Location: Happiness is found inside your smile :)
3,178 posts, read 13,428,599 times
Reputation: 1267
Well I can not condone picking up a woman EVERY night - but what makes you think that your friend has any emotional attachment to these women?

You sound like a good man (man right?) and you are loyal to the fact that you believe that sex and emotions are truly tied together.

Well they aren't.

I've have several "hook ups" and can not say that I was emotionally connected to the majority of them (of course some I did date for longer periods of time)

WIth me I'm more emotionally attached to someone where I have a mental connection.

Hook ups are just sex - they don't need to be complicated with emotions. Which is why sometimes hook ups are hotter and more fun than long term relationship sex. I didn't say more emotionally full filling - I'm talking physical only.

PS - to answer your question "Are you ill at ease the first time you try to get sexual or romantic with someone new?"

Nope not "ill at ease" at all - if anything it's exciting and some of the greatest excitement I've ever had in my life, those first kisses (or first rolls in bed, depending on the situation) are what give people that "alive" feeling.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 10:59 AM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,595 posts, read 35,304,766 times
Reputation: 14706
Then you might as well hook up with a blow up doll! I want emotion with my sex!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 11:03 AM
 
Location: Alexandria, VA
1,078 posts, read 3,500,589 times
Reputation: 488
Sex and romance are often two different things...this guy just wants a hooker, that he does not have to pay for. There is no emotion involved. And the only reason he feels like he failed, is he failed to get some.
MBG
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 11:04 AM
 
Location: STL
1,093 posts, read 3,495,127 times
Reputation: 575
Casual sex is not for me. Even when I was single and had casual sex.. I literally got nothing from it.

I need the emotion. Makes it a million times better!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 11:07 AM
 
Location: Texas
8,668 posts, read 20,333,760 times
Reputation: 21296
Default an "risk adverse" old lady's rant!

I can't even believe I'm commenting on this thread, but oh, well. Indulge the rantings of an old lady here (I'm 51!) Someone on the religion forum said I have a definite "mom vibe" which doesn't offend me at all!

So here it comes: I'm surprised that, morality issues aside, that people are still having a lot of casual sex due to AIDS in this day and time. Seems risky to me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 02:08 PM
 
Location: FL
1,943 posts, read 7,792,530 times
Reputation: 2262
Usually the people who pick up a person for the night are people who don't want it to be emotional, so it doesn't bother them when it's not. At least at that moment they don't want it to be motional. They want it to be exciting, sexual and probably drunken moment...so emotion doesn't come (no pun intended ) into it. A lot of other things do though!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 05:07 PM
 
Location: Coachella Valley, California
15,564 posts, read 36,588,859 times
Reputation: 13184
Hmmmm ... I'm not gonna touch this topic with a 10 foot pole!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 05:36 PM
 
Location: FL
1,943 posts, read 7,792,530 times
Reputation: 2262
Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes View Post
Hmmmm ... I'm not gonna touch this topic with a 10 foot pole!
And I won't touch that with a........ten foot...*pole*
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2007, 06:18 PM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,595 posts, read 35,304,766 times
Reputation: 14706
My pole points north and south!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top