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So they say you should look for a mate who is 80% of what you want (including all core values being in alignment of course) and the other 20% you just have to compromise and negotiate on.
I was wondering...for those who are married...is your husband/wife at 80%? Or would you say more like 60%? Or 100%? What percentage would you rate him/her, and how would you rate your happiness in your marriage?
I was wondering...for those who are married...is your husband/wife at 80%? Or would you say more like 60%? Or 100%? What percentage would you rate him/her, and how would you rate your happiness in your marriage?
On some things we match quite well, on others not at all. If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't. I would look for someone that I matched better with on a number of things, and would be less worried about some other matches.
I thought I made the right decision at the time. I was wrong. I have no bigger regret.
We were never a 100% match going into our marriage. Our differences either complemented each other, were irrelevant, insignificant or intriguing at the time or were unknown (some things you'll only find out when some unplanned or external event happens).
There have been times when those differences became so pronounced that I contemplated why I ever married my dh.
But overall, I don't regret marrying him, I'm glad we were able to overcome some hurdles and strengthen our marriage and I honestly don't think that there is a better match for me than him.
So they say you should look for a mate who is 80% of what you want (including all core values being in alignment of course) and the other 20% you just have to compromise and negotiate on.
I was wondering...for those who are married...is your husband/wife at 80%? Or would you say more like 60%? Or 100%? What percentage would you rate him/her, and how would you rate your happiness in your marriage?
I have never heard of this 80% thing. Who are "they" who say this anyway???
I married my husband because he is 110% of everything I want and need - we may have to compromise on issues or negoiate the day to day stuff (we aren't even in the same political party!) but that doesn't negatively impact my happiness at being married to him. I thank God every day for the privilege of being with this wonderful person
Young women, remember this...don't marry the one you can live with - marry the one you CAN'T live without - when each partner does that, nothing can break you apart.
There are parts of me where she does not see eye to eye.
1. I'm hyper-religious and am a regular church-going catholic (She's not)
2. Career-obsessed and ambitious (She just needs an average ordinary Joe, while I aspire 180 degrees opposite that)
3. It's no doubt I'm a mama's boy
But it's all about compromise and connection. I am attached to her like I am attached to nothing else.
Last edited by Currency Pair Crocodile; 04-08-2010 at 10:27 PM..
Reason: typo
So they say you should look for a mate who is 80% of what you want (including all core values being in alignment of course) and the other 20% you just have to compromise and negotiate on.
Never heard of this. Who are this "They" that you speak of? Human interaction and especially relationships are so complex that they cannot be measured in terms of percentages. What, if you met someone who was only 79.5% does that mean they are not a good match?
Ive seen people who found great life-long mates who were probably only 25% of what they were originally looking for/wanted but because the spiritual (NOT religious) connection they had, it made all the other little things they were seeking seem obsolete.
The stuff people come up with sometimes is just so ridiculous. 80% crap is just ridiculous b.s.
OMG people stop being so literal. It's an IDEA geez. "OMG he's 79.5% I can't marry him". The IDEA is that you get most of what you are looking for and don't sit here and look for 'Mr. Perfection In All Areas No Problems No Nothing'. Some people on these boards can be so immature. Thank you to those who actually answered the question.
Sorry, you can't measure happiness, emotions are not quantifiable commodities..
I'm happy, that's all that counts.
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