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I joined two online dating sites recently and went on my first date in a long time yesterday. My date had to borrow his sister's car to come on our date. When he got there, we had Tex Mex which he was trying for the first time. He really liked it. We had good conversation throughout. When the bill comes, he says "So, how are we gonna do this?" and he turns to me.....I'm glad I was able to convince him to try the restaurant's special which was fajitas for two at $12.87 which is normally $25. I ended up paying for our meal which included his sprite and the tip. Total was right below $20 so not expensive at all....but...so we leave the restaurant. Outside in the parking lot, he catches me off-guard and kisses me. One of the worst kisses I've had in a long time. He suggests we go to the mall. By the way, I knew he was unemployed before we went on the date. I didn't let that bother me since many have fallen on hard times lately. (But he doesn't even have a cell phone.) Well, once in the mall, he asks to borrow my cell phone to call his sister to find out if he can stay out later or if she needs him to return with the vehicle. He is 32 y/o. (He is currently living with his sister rent-free.) I tell him I'm meeting some of my friends at a pub. He says "I don't want you to go to the pub, I rather you stay and hang out with me." I was just laughing inside. You can't even pay for a $20 meal yet u wanna tell me what to do?? LOL. So I say, well, where exactly are we gonna go? He has no money or at least pretends not to and I definitely am not gonna pay for anything else. So I told him it was either we go to the pub or he can leave. He suggests we go to my place to which I responded by scoffing. He goes with me to a pub where I met some of my friends. He was so quiet...didn't say a word to my friends outside of "Hi, I'm _______." He left shortly thereafter and went home. I stayed with my friends. He asked me if I was going to call him today. I didn't. I get a message from him saying "Did I do that poorly last night that I don't even get a last call to say things won't work. I have to admit I expected better from you. I guess I miss judged u." So that's his message word for word, spelled just like he did.
Needless to say, there will not be a second date. How could he expect a second date and for me to be head over heels with him after that?????
Strictly speaking, you go out with an unemployed dude stowing away at a sibling's house and what do you expect??
Better yet...what is a betamanlet? Is that like someone testing what it's like to be under 5' 11"?
OP you played the game and lost. Don't hate the player...hate the game. Keep your chin up and keep fishing. Your bound to make a decent catch eventually.
Dutch is bad enough - I'd probably dump a guy if he wanted to go dutch on a first date too. (He'd have to have the best reason in the world for not wanting/ able to be chivalrous)
How about because this is the 21st century and it's no longer considered "chivalrous" to presume a woman doesn't have the financial wherewithal to pay her share; in fact it's practically considered patronizing. Just as you'd dump a guy who didn't pick up the whole tab on the first date, I would have serious reservations about a second date with a woman who thinks the man should pick up the tab on the first date. What that says to me is "she expects to be a kept woman." That doesn't fly in 2010.
How about because this is the 21st century and it's no longer considered "chivalrous" to presume a woman doesn't have the financial wherewithal to pay her share; in fact it's practically considered patronizing. Just as you'd dump a guy who didn't pick up the whole tab on the first date, I would have serious reservations about a second date with a woman who thinks the man should pick up the tab on the first date. What that says to me is "she expects to be a kept woman." That doesn't fly in 2010.
That doesn't say much for your manhood. You probably think it's ok to live with your sister and borrow her car too?
If the guy asked her on a date, the least he could do is pay the 20 bucks it cost at some elcheapo fast food joint.
Chivalry is not dead. It's just that there are more manlets running around than there are men these days.
That doesn't say much for your manhood. You probably think it's ok to live with your sister and borrow her car too?
If the guy asked her on a date, the least he could do is pay the 20 bucks it cost at some elcheapo fast food joint.
Chivalry is not dead. It's just that there are more manlets running around than there are men these days.
Yeah sure, going Dutch is the exact equivalent of living with your sister and borrowing her car. Awesome critical reasoning skills there. This isn't the Leave It To Beaver era: women are now independent, autonomous, capable beings -- or at least the ones I want to spend my time with are. I'm secure enough in my manhood that I don't feel the need to patronize women. Treat them with respect and dignity, yes. Put them on a pedestal and treat them as fragile objects... no. Those days are gone, and women themselves have seen to that.
I also wouldn't go to a cheap-o Mexican restaurant on a first date either, but to each their own.
Location: somewhere close to Tampa, but closer to the beach
2,035 posts, read 5,037,251 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rance
That doesn't say much for your manhood. You probably think it's ok to live with your sister and borrow her car too?
If the guy asked her on a date, the least he could do is pay the 20 bucks it cost at some elcheapo fast food joint.
Chivalry is not dead. It's just that there are more manlets running around than there are men these days.
Again..Well said Rance!!!..the real men around here need to start the anti manlet campaign..and expose these weakling, pink shirt wearing whining in the corner peepers for who they aren't...men of course..
Sensitivity is fine...so is desiring to not be any woman's..or best friends bank account..but for god's sake..don't whine about paying for the first date..you ask her out, YOU pay..PERIOD..if you can't, or, even worse, ..think she should, expect to get tossed for a real man ......DOWN WITH THE MANLET!!!..or what ever excuse you desire to call your lack of b^^^S
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