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. Our daughter is raising havoc with our marriage. This is not a new thing, it has been going on for far to long. She got herself pregnant, with a varmint who seriously needs killin', and to 'keep her relationship with her daughter intact' my wife insisted that I tolerate the creep, until hings got wayyyy out of hand, then I needed to 'handle it'. So, now we can at least all agree the guy is vermin, and our daughter now uses the grandbaby as a tool to keep herself planted firmly in between my wife and I. She is at our house , every single day, for t least 4-5 hours, in the evening, usually she goes into OUR bedroom, lays on my side of the bed, text messaging, while my wife chases the baby around the house. So, I says this needs to stop, my wife flips out, and , of course , the daughter (I adopted her and her older brother, we have one together as well, ...still living at home) takes this as her cue to call me an 'abusive *******" (drama is her speciality) and the whole thing goes nuclear twixt my wife and I. Every single time I try and talk about this with my wife she will not hear my concerns, or see what I see. There is far more going on, and things that have gone on, than I can list here,however, my biggest concern is the strain this is putting on my marriage. The daughter knows how to play her mother, and the MIL as well,(nuther long story) and I get to be the dick. All I want is my own household back, and for the daughter to be a friggin adult and respect our home. What does a guy do when his wife puts the daughter and grandchild so far above her husband? Actually just refuses to see what this girl is doing? I cannot describe how infuriated I am getting with this, but, I know if I do what I want to do, it's going to get all kinds of ugly. Right now, I can't care a whit about alienating my daughter. She has disrespected me to the point that I don't care anymore. She is a nasty creature, it pains me to say that, but, it's true. I suppose this is just a vent , at the end of the day, but it helps to put it all down somewhere. Sometimes, I sorely miss the days when it was just me, my dog and the most I had to worry about was filling my gas tank. As much as I love my wife, I can't take much more of this. I cannot even fathom how MY Dad would have reacted to this. Ya know, small as it seems , in the big picture, the laying on my bed (even going in our bedroom without so much as a by your leave) irritates me the most. The parents bedroom is PRIVATE, and off limits, in the world I grew up in. What is with todays youth? Why my wife cannot see how I feel about this (she actually said I was being "stupid") is just beyond me. (sigh) maybe I'll just take off on my horse for a couple weeks, the solitude might put things in perspective a bit more.
This probably isn't what you want to read..Let it be your wifes problem...you did say she's okay with this. Turn a blind eye. Eventually the girl will move out and on with her life (maybe)or Your wife may tire of the situation on her own and lay down some rules.
. Our daughter is raising havoc with our marriage. This is not a new thing, it has been going on for far to long. She got herself pregnant, with a varmint who seriously needs killin', and to 'keep her relationship with her daughter intact' my wife insisted that I tolerate the creep, until hings got wayyyy out of hand, then I needed to 'handle it'. So, now we can at least all agree the guy is vermin, and our daughter now uses the grandbaby as a tool to keep herself planted firmly in between my wife and I. She is at our house , every single day, for t least 4-5 hours, in the evening, usually she goes into OUR bedroom, lays on my side of the bed, text messaging, while my wife chases the baby around the house. So, I says this needs to stop, my wife flips out, and , of course , the daughter (I adopted her and her older brother, we have one together as well, ...still living at home) takes this as her cue to call me an 'abusive *******" (drama is her speciality) and the whole thing goes nuclear twixt my wife and I. Every single time I try and talk about this with my wife she will not hear my concerns, or see what I see. There is far more going on, and things that have gone on, than I can list here,however, my biggest concern is the strain this is putting on my marriage. The daughter knows how to play her mother, and the MIL as well,(nuther long story) and I get to be the dick. All I want is my own household back, and for the daughter to be a friggin adult and respect our home. What does a guy do when his wife puts the daughter and grandchild so far above her husband? Actually just refuses to see what this girl is doing? I cannot describe how infuriated I am getting with this, but, I know if I do what I want to do, it's going to get all kinds of ugly. Right now, I can't care a whit about alienating my daughter. She has disrespected me to the point that I don't care anymore. She is a nasty creature, it pains me to say that, but, it's true. I suppose this is just a vent , at the end of the day, but it helps to put it all down somewhere. Sometimes, I sorely miss the days when it was just me, my dog and the most I had to worry about was filling my gas tank. As much as I love my wife, I can't take much more of this. I cannot even fathom how MY Dad would have reacted to this. Ya know, small as it seems , in the big picture, the laying on my bed (even going in our bedroom without so much as a by your leave) irritates me the most. The parents bedroom is PRIVATE, and off limits, in the world I grew up in. What is with todays youth? Why my wife cannot see how I feel about this (she actually said I was being "stupid") is just beyond me. (sigh) maybe I'll just take off on my horse for a couple weeks, the solitude might put things in perspective a bit more.
Geez, I thought I had it bad buddy! BTW, fellow "tin banger" and firearm enthusiast here. You know I know what we feel like at the end of the day. The last thing you need is to come home to this s***! I don't know about you but our busy season is just about ready to start. At least while we are on the gas and kicking a** it helps take your mind off it a little. I hope everything eventually works out for you and wish you the best of luck. Rugged (band of brothers)
Sounds like you need to be rid of your wife. You should disappear for awhile and let wife handle her stupid daughter herself. I think a month long trip is in order for you. And don't leave a phone number.
Sounds like you need to be rid of your wife. You should disappear for awhile and let wife handle her stupid daughter herself. I think a month long trip is in order for you. And don't leave a phone number.
Oh, they will call! They always do!LOL...... Can you hurry I'm freezing or sweating my a** off!LOL...........
Wow, man.. that totally sucks. My dad wouldnt have put up with it.. Either address it and be the man of the house and tell her how its going to be (not because I agree with that kind of mentality, but clearly someone needs to step up and take charge) or get out of there. Give her (your wife) an ultimatum and stick with it..
Put up a "Do not ENTER" sign on your door and lock it up. Go to her room and sit on her bed and watch t.v. there while she is on your bed. Ask her to pay rent. Tell her that she has to pay the phone/internet bill. Go through her stuff while you are in her room. Tell her that she gets no/little privacy since its your house.That should work. She'll be out of there in no time.
I just realized that she might not even live there. If that's the case, then you just need to find yourself somewhere else to hang out at while she is there. Like go to a bar or a friend's house for a few hours. When your wife sees that you are not there to help, she might try to negotiate with you. Its not right that she is simply ignoring how you feel. I will tell you this though, she won't change anything unless she starts seeing your point of view.
Put up a "Do not ENTER" sign on your door and lock it up. Go to her room and sit on her bed and watch t.v. there while she is on your bed. Ask her to pay rent. Tell her that she has to pay the phone/internet bill. Go through her stuff while you are in her room. Tell her that she gets no/little privacy since its your house.That should work. She'll be out of there in no time.
I just realized that she might not even live there. If that's the case, then you just need to find yourself somewhere else to hang out at while she is there. Like go to a bar or a friend's house for a few hours. When your wife sees that you are not there to help, she might try to negotiate with you. Its not right that she is simply ignoring how you feel. I will tell you this though, she won't change anything unless she starts seeing your point of view.
She'll be out in no time, yeah, along with her mom
I'm wondering if the OP will have the same issues blocking his head, if it were his "own" daughter
Fatherhood in this case isn't about shagging step-daughter's mom alone. It's all about being a father.
. Our daughter is raising havoc with our marriage. This is not a new thing, it has been going on for far to long. She got herself pregnant, with a varmint who seriously needs killin', and to 'keep her relationship with her daughter intact' my wife insisted that I tolerate the creep, until hings got wayyyy out of hand, then I needed to 'handle it'. So, now we can at least all agree the guy is vermin, and our daughter now uses the grandbaby as a tool to keep herself planted firmly in between my wife and I. She is at our house , every single day, for t least 4-5 hours, in the evening, usually she goes into OUR bedroom, lays on my side of the bed, text messaging, while my wife chases the baby around the house. So, I says this needs to stop, my wife flips out, and , of course , the daughter (I adopted her and her older brother, we have one together as well, ...still living at home) takes this as her cue to call me an 'abusive *******" (drama is her speciality) and the whole thing goes nuclear twixt my wife and I. Every single time I try and talk about this with my wife she will not hear my concerns, or see what I see. There is far more going on, and things that have gone on, than I can list here,however, my biggest concern is the strain this is putting on my marriage. The daughter knows how to play her mother, and the MIL as well,(nuther long story) and I get to be the dick. All I want is my own household back, and for the daughter to be a friggin adult and respect our home. What does a guy do when his wife puts the daughter and grandchild so far above her husband? Actually just refuses to see what this girl is doing? I cannot describe how infuriated I am getting with this, but, I know if I do what I want to do, it's going to get all kinds of ugly. Right now, I can't care a whit about alienating my daughter. She has disrespected me to the point that I don't care anymore. She is a nasty creature, it pains me to say that, but, it's true. I suppose this is just a vent , at the end of the day, but it helps to put it all down somewhere. Sometimes, I sorely miss the days when it was just me, my dog and the most I had to worry about was filling my gas tank. As much as I love my wife, I can't take much more of this. I cannot even fathom how MY Dad would have reacted to this. Ya know, small as it seems , in the big picture, the laying on my bed (even going in our bedroom without so much as a by your leave) irritates me the most. The parents bedroom is PRIVATE, and off limits, in the world I grew up in. What is with todays youth? Why my wife cannot see how I feel about this (she actually said I was being "stupid") is just beyond me. (sigh) maybe I'll just take off on my horse for a couple weeks, the solitude might put things in perspective a bit more.
All I can say is, we teach people how to treat us...
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. Our daughter is raising havoc with our marriage. This is not a new thing, it has been going on for far to long. She got herself pregnant, with a varmint who seriously needs killin', and to 'keep her relationship with her daughter intact' my wife insisted that I tolerate the creep, until hings got wayyyy out of hand, then I needed to 'handle it'
. So, now we can at least all agree the guy is vermin, and our daughter now uses the grandbaby as a tool to keep herself planted firmly in between my wife and I. She is at our house , every single day, for t least 4-5 hours, in the evening, usually she goes into OUR bedroom, lays on my side of the bed, text messaging, while my wife chases the baby around the house. So, I says this needs to stop, my wife flips out, and , of course , the daughter (I adopted her and her older brother, we have one together as well, ...still living at home) takes this as her cue to call me an 'abusive *******" (drama is her speciality) and the whole thing goes nuclear twixt my wife and I. Every single time I try and talk about this with my wife she will not hear my concerns, or see what I see. There is far more going on, and things that have gone on, than I can list here,however, my biggest concern is the strain this is putting on my marriage. The daughter knows how to play her mother, and the MIL as well,(nuther long story
) and I get to be the dick. All I want is my own household back, and for the daughter to be a friggin adult and respect our home. What does a guy do when his wife puts the daughter and grandchild so far above her husband? Actually just refuses to see what this girl is doing? I cannot describe how infuriated I am getting with this, but, I know if I do what I want to do, it's going to get all kinds of ugly. Right now, I can't care a whit about alienating my daughter. She has disrespected me to the point that I don't care anymore. She is a nasty creature, it pains me to say that, but, it's true. I suppose this is just a vent , at the end of the day, but it helps to put it all down somewhere. Sometimes, I sorely miss the days when it was just me, my dog and the most I had to worry about was filling my gas tank. As much as I love my wife, I can't take much more of this. I cannot even fathom how MY Dad would have reacted to this. Ya know, small as it seems , in the big picture, the laying on my bed (even going in our bedroom without so much as a by your leave) irritates me the most. The parents bedroom is PRIVATE, and off limits, in the world I grew up in. What is with todays youth? Why my wife cannot see how I feel about this (she actually said I was being "stupid"
You know I know what we feel like at the end of the day.
The last thing you need is to come home to this s***! I don't know about you but our busy season is just about ready to start. At least while we are on the gas and kicking a** it helps take your mind off it a little. I hope everything eventually works out for you and wish you the best of luck. Rugged
(band of brothers)
My dad wouldnt have put up with it.. Either address it and be the man of the house and tell her how its going to be (not because I agree with that kind of mentality, but clearly someone needs to step up and take charge) or get out of there. Give her (your wife) an ultimatum and stick with it..
