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I tried a couple of times to go out with this girl. She didn't reject me with a "No" but I thought she would look for excuses not to go out with me. It's not like she had to work, attend a funeral, or something. She just didn't go out with me. Ok, no hard feelings. I stopped trying and moved on. She then started to ask me if I would be available on the weekend, if I would work X day of the week, etc. I was a bit annoyed. Didn't play games but just told her what I would be doing, which was something I prefered than going out with her. Until she just asked me out straight up "...hey! How about going to X place this saturday? Oh, there's this new restaurant in town, let's go! I'll make reservations today!" I thought, why not? And she took me out, oh yeah .
My ex tried for like 2 years to come back with me. Apologized for what she caused for our break-up many times. I would tell her to forget that, it was in the past and we had to move on. We would still hang out with the same group of friends and even go out just her and me, I just didn't feel like going back to her and still don't. I think she got the idea now and I do feel she gave up. So no comeback there but we do have a nice friendship though.
Any of you guys got rejected by a girl you wanted to go out with and then later got accepted? If yes, how long did it take and how did you pull this off?
Sure did.
There was a girl that I got chummy with, so I finally asked her out. She said to me, "Well, that's awfully sweet of you, but I would rather stay friends."
Nice as I could be, I said, "Well, that's thoughtful of you, but I really have enough friends as it is." And I left it at that, and we had a funny conversation about something totally unrelated.
As it turns out, my reply drove her crazy to the point that she finally called me up and asked me out. Afterwards, when I asked what changed her mind, she said, "When you said that to me, and said it so nicely, I really liked it. Most guys would have been offended or embarrassed."
The moral of the story? Never take rejection as some soul-crushing rebuff. Often, "No" means "Not right now." Now that doesn't give you license to be a pest. Just have some panache about the entire enterprise.
Any of you guys got rejected by a girl you wanted to go out with and then later got accepted? If yes, how long did it take and how did you pull this off?
You've been watching too many chick flicks. In fantasy, women like to think like that. Makes their quest for a mate seem like a noble enterprise.
Reality is different. They don't want to be thought of as someone who cannot make up their mind, even if it is on a spur of the moment "gut" feeling.
Of course, its always possible that they might forget who you are. This is a strong likelihood for any woman who is "in demand". However, I don't like your chances in this case.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Texas User Well isn't that sounding desperate for never giving up?
You have to make her think that you can also get other girls and just her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Cat
Not really. Just because you're really interested in a woman and you got your mind set on getting her doesn't necessarily make you a stalker. You got to do things right in order for her to notice you and make yourself a little more intriguing to her.
The consensus of women on this site seems to be is she says she's not interested, well that's that. Of course, if he's a really wealthy looker, she will be very pleased if he persists. Makes her feel wanted and important.
For nearly all other men, if they stay on good terms with her, they've been demoted to the "friends" category and there is almost certainly no coming back from that.
Because women hold all the cards in such matters, this is 100% for the benefit of them. A guy can lower his sites considerably and probably find some sort of "success" or just realize that there is really little reason to keep looking.
when im shot down i rarely care, and i think it shows. not in a mean or bad way. a lot of times the girls come back around afterwards when they see it doesnot bother me. but by then ive lost interest so i dont persue again.
I tried a couple of times to go out with this girl. She didn't reject me with a "No" but I thought she would look for excuses not to go out with me. It's not like she had to work, attend a funeral, or something. She just didn't go out with me. Ok, no hard feelings. I stopped trying and moved on. She then started to ask me if I would be available on the weekend, if I would work X day of the week, etc. I was a bit annoyed. Didn't play games but just told her what I would be doing, which was something I prefered than going out with her. Until she just asked me out straight up "...hey! How about going to X place this saturday? Oh, there's this new restaurant in town, let's go! I'll make reservations today!" I thought, why not? And she took me out, oh yeah .
My ex tried for like 2 years to come back with me. Apologized for what she caused for our break-up many times. I would tell her to forget that, it was in the past and we had to move on. We would still hang out with the same group of friends and even go out just her and me, I just didn't feel like going back to her and still don't. I think she got the idea now and I do feel she gave up. So no comeback there but we do have a nice friendship though.
There was a girl that I got chummy with, so I finally asked her out. She said to me, "Well, that's awfully sweet of you, but I would rather stay friends."
Nice as I could be, I said, "Well, that's thoughtful of you, but I really have enough friends as it is." And I left it at that, and we had a funny conversation about something totally unrelated.
As it turns out, my reply drove her crazy to the point that she finally called me up and asked me out. Afterwards, when I asked what changed her mind, she said, "When you said that to me, and said it so nicely, I really liked it. Most guys would have been offended or embarrassed."
The moral of the story? Never take rejection as some soul-crushing rebuff. Often, "No" means "Not right now." Now that doesn't give you license to be a pest. Just have some panache about the entire enterprise.
Right, if its a No now then don't have your hopes up for her to say yes later either. Just keep her in the low priority list.
when im shot down i rarely care, and i think it shows. not in a mean or bad way. a lot of times the girls come back around afterwards when they see it doesnot bother me. but by then ive lost interest so i dont persue again.
When do you actually ask them out? Like after how many days?
could be a red flag, the gal that burns hot and cold.
but if it only happens once maybe she is cautious. that is a good quality.
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