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ehh, no point in really bringing it up to begin with. it would be a bit of a mood killer if im on an early date and she feels the need to tell me shes dating other ppl
i would just assume we're not exclusive until someone wants to make it that way and the other person is free to do what they want in the meantime. doesnt most of the world operate that way to anywayS?
ehh, no point in really bringing it up to begin with. it would be a bit of a mood killer if im on an early date and she feels the need to tell me shes dating other ppl
i would just assume we're not exclusive until someone wants to make it that way and the other person is free to do what they want in the meantime. doesnt most of the world operate that way to anywayS?
I think you can see by this thread that the answer is no. You should do what feels right, but just remember that you would certainly have no room to complain if you found out the gal was seeing others.
I'm a believer in communication...but that's just me.
communication is fine but this isnt something worth bringing up in the first few dates, if at all. wouldnt try and hide it but she shouldnt really be asking anyways
Thanks for the feedback Chessie. Honestly, about the chemistry/fireworks I guess there hasn't been. Although after date two was a pretty intense makeout session which doesn't happen often. But I'd say I'll just go with it. She said she had plans in Sunday when I asked her to do something then, so I'll wait until Monday to call her. She didn't say what her plans were, and it could be a date with another guy for that matter. I wouldn't hold it against if she is on another date, and I don't want to even know.
ehh, no point in really bringing it up to begin with. it would be a bit of a mood killer if im on an early date and she feels the need to tell me shes dating other ppl
i would just assume we're not exclusive until someone wants to make it that way and the other person is free to do what they want in the meantime. doesnt most of the world operate that way to anywayS?
I'm with you EP. Aren't there really only the two options? Exclusive or not exclusive? If you haven't talked about being exclusive, this early in the game I wouldn't require a discussion.
I am however a fan of the inbetween - not seeing other people but not being overly serious. It's a good comfort level without pushing the relationship faster than it needs to be.
communication is fine but this isnt something worth bringing up in the first few dates, if at all. wouldnt try and hide it but she shouldnt really be asking anyways
No I didn't mean to imply that she should be asking. I just prefer that things be clear. I've have my share of men that make these assumptions (yes...men can be every bit as wacko about this ) so if I get some idea that the guy is thinking you-and-only-you, and I'm not there, I absolutely will make some sort of statement to ensure that they are aware of that.
I have to add though, I usually either feel it, or I don't. I've tried the dating a few times to see if something happens...and that just doesn't work for me. I always give it a shot (and I always encourage others too as well ), but my initial gut feelings are usually correct.
I For cdubs obviously that first girl doesn't care one way or another, she is doing what she does and it might involve other men.
She might or might not care. Not all women are the same. Unless she says that she is dating several men, it is insulting to a woman that isn't, that she be accused of doing precisely that. Insecurity is not a pretty quality. And neither is being put into a category that isn't her. Better to trust that she is being honest, than to tell her to her face that she has several boyfriends, when she might not have any.
If I was woman number 1, I wouldn't expect to be the only woman he is dating. I also, would try to see, someway, if he is the type of guy who minds if a woman he is dating is seeing other men as well. 3 dates is not enough to hold anything together. My personal motto is always : Sex can be quick, but love takes time. If she wants to take it slow, she definately wants a serious relationship, otherwise she wouldn't of said she wants to take it slow. Take what slow? The sex? They're already making out, so what is it that she wants to take slow? Probably the love part.
Seems to me that right now, she is still emotionally somewhere else, but willing to move on from where she was. However, love isn't built in 3 dates, and slow is the only way to go.
Last edited by temptation001; 06-04-2010 at 01:27 AM..
it depends you should really chose one of the other get to know them and decide who you want to date one way or the other they will find out and you may end up completely dateless when you make it official
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You should do what feels right, but just remember that you would certainly have no room to complain if you found out the gal was seeing others. 
) so if I get some idea that the guy is thinking you-and-only-you, and I'm not there, I absolutely will make some sort of statement to ensure that they are aware of that.
), but my initial gut feelings are usually correct.
