Visiting other denominations. (salvation, church, Baptist, bible)
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Hi. I have said it before, my family is Southern Baptist. My family has also now gone through a separation. The kids live with me, and go to my husbands house on the weekends.
We had agreed that they would worship with me, but all of a sudden, after 2 years, he started going back to church.
Now, he is taking the kids to a Methodist church. Now, nothing against Methodist. I have been to this church myself, I do think there is a difference between the two, and have talked to the Pastor at that church in the past, and asked him what he thought the difference was, and he said that methodist was more laid back.
When I was there, I felt a bit of Catholocism (sp) going on there. It felt as though the church was a sping off of of the catholic church. Pastor told me that they were just like So Bap, but laid back.
I even posed the ?/ here on this board. My daughter has gone before the church and has given her heart to Christ, has said the sinners prayer, etc, and was supposed to be Baptised a few weeks ago, but now, we are without a preacher. It has been put off.
Now my husband is taking them to a different church. I know people visit, etc, but I think he does this so that they dont see me during the time period of worship service. A couple of weeks ago, my dd wanted to sit with me, and he did not want to let her. 3x he would not let her by, and she started getting upset and did not understand why she couldn't just sit w me.
The three of them sit in one pew, and I sit just behind them. I really think he is doing this just so that I will not see the kids during this hour of time, of 'his' time.
I think that the kids should remain where they have been going, and with my dd going to be baptised soon, and my ds having already been baptised there, they have connections w other children, Sunday school teacher, youth leaders, etc,,
They have been through the change of our separation and now he is changing their church going around, or if I am sick and he knows I am not going, he doesn't take them at all. I think he is doing this as a 'power' issue.
I am just venting, but would like your input on the changing around of denominations in kids, at an impressionable age, 11 and 13, esp w one getting ready to be Baptised, then the stopping of her going to her home church... ;(
Since you posted this thread on the religion forum and not the Christianity sub-forum I assume you are asking for ALL of our inputs. I think a major problem with religion is the constant feeling that one's own belief system is somehow deemed "better" than anothers. I really got this vibe from your intonation of the Catholic church. What is wrong with the Catholic church? You made it sound like as long as the Methodist church was more similar to the Southern Baptist church it would be ok. However, I couldn't ignore the fact that you seemed to put emphasis on being certain that the Methodist church was not like Catholic church in that you almost specifically asked the pastor about this. I think it's important to have children exposed to AS MANY beliefs as possible and not streamline them into any one particular religion. I think that perhaps you are seeking a validation for your underlying motives? Don't take that the wrong way, but I do suspect that perhaps you feel the only way to God is the Southern Baptist way?? If so, isn't that being a bit narrow minded and in effect doesn't that bode the same possibility for your children?
Hi. I have said it before, my family is Southern Baptist. My family has also now gone through a separation. The kids live with me, and go to my husbands house on the weekends.
We had agreed that they would worship with me, but all of a sudden, after 2 years, he started going back to church.
Now, he is taking the kids to a Methodist church. Now, nothing against Methodist. I have been to this church myself, I do think there is a difference between the two, and have talked to the Pastor at that church in the past, and asked him what he thought the difference was, and he said that methodist was more laid back.
When I was there, I felt a bit of Catholocism (sp) going on there. It felt as though the church was a sping off of of the catholic church. Pastor told me that they were just like So Bap, but laid back.
I even posed the ?/ here on this board. My daughter has gone before the church and has given her heart to Christ, has said the sinners prayer, etc, and was supposed to be Baptised a few weeks ago, but now, we are without a preacher. It has been put off.
Now my husband is taking them to a different church. I know people visit, etc, but I think he does this so that they dont see me during the time period of worship service. A couple of weeks ago, my dd wanted to sit with me, and he did not want to let her. 3x he would not let her by, and she started getting upset and did not understand why she couldn't just sit w me.
The three of them sit in one pew, and I sit just behind them. I really think he is doing this just so that I will not see the kids during this hour of time, of 'his' time.
I think that the kids should remain where they have been going, and with my dd going to be baptised soon, and my ds having already been baptised there, they have connections w other children, Sunday school teacher, youth leaders, etc,,
They have been through the change of our separation and now he is changing their church going around, or if I am sick and he knows I am not going, he doesn't take them at all. I think he is doing this as a 'power' issue.
I am just venting, but would like your input on the changing around of denominations in kids, at an impressionable age, 11 and 13, esp w one getting ready to be Baptised, then the stopping of her going to her home church... ;(
As far as doctrine goes, there is not much difference. A little here a little there. But who has the absolute truth anyway? You'd have to have the mind of God to know that. So as long as God's drawing power is in that church (people being saved), then God approves. A church God does not approve of will not have a drawing power for salvation.
mt 7:20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.
John 6:44 No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him: and I will raise him up at the last day.
I choose to be non-denominational. In this way it leaves me with not being govern by denominational rules. Which allows me to explore more into the word for myself.
phil 2:12 Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.
I find it brings me closer to God when I do it this way.
Last edited by ikester7579; 10-09-2007 at 05:22 AM..
Imo, there is nothing wrong with taking children to different denominations, this allows them to see and know that God has no favoritism and that no one group of christians are "chosen".. The problem is with the person who uses his children as an excuse to hurt his ex-wife by his transferring his power over her to using the children to abuse her...mentally.
First, I don't think there is anything wrong with children attending other denominations, but I also don't think any denomination is has a monopoly on the path to God.
Second, I can completely understand why your husband might want to attend a different church with your kids. I imagine that returning to church after an absence of two years would feel a little awkward, and then to be attending the same church as the spouse from whom you are separated, and THEN to have your child want to sit with your spouse instead of you even though technically the weekends are your time . . . I would want to attend a different church also.
If he really is doing this just to spite you, then I imagine he will stop attending after a while and the kids can attend where they want. On the other hand, if he is really wanting to attend church again, then I think you should be supportive of that.
Is there some reason why your husband has the kids every single Sunday, robyn? I would probably want them to go to the Baptist Church at least every other week if it were me.
I know some Methodist Churchs are different but many have gotten very liberal even to the point of not accepting the Bible as the Word of God. Now I don't know what the one in your town is like. They may still be theologically conservative. If it were my kids, I would certainly want to know what their doctrine was as it has the potential, at least, to be DECIDEDLY different than Baptist.
Go ahead and make an issue of this if you want to. What will it gain you? Will it bring you children closer to you or drive another wedge between you and their father?
We left the Southern Baptist church years ago. We were both Sunday School teachers and the more we taught "the Baptist Way" the more we were convinced that we didn't want to bring our children up like that.
The Methodist church is a great church. I personally feel that it is a better church in which to raise children. The Methodist do at least recognize that there is more than one road to travel. Please learn more about it by studying your self. Don't just take your pastors word for it. He, of course, would not want to see them change.
I think your children will be fine, as far as the church issue goes. Kids don't have near the problems with spiritual matters as adults do, in my opinion. What would concern me more, would be the issues between you and your estranged husband. I think that the two of you need to address these problems, before they become worse. That is what will affect your children, much more than which church they worship God in.
It was the Pastor at the Methodist church who gave me what he felt was the difference. My husband is attending church all of a sudden, not wanting to go before, keeping me and the kids from going before, now going, just a few weeks before custody hearing.
Right now he has the kids every weekend. UNtil we can get something else figured out. He did not go to mediation. I dont really get much time with the kids, just lets get ready for school and lets get ready for bed time.
I am not on here to start arguements with people, just asking a simple question.. Thank you all... Blue...
Also, I am for the SOBaptistway, and so is my husband,he was brought up in it. He just chose not to go for a while, and if my dd wantsto sit with me, whats wrong with that? Stand there and hold her back like a child?
This is howhe treats us, belittles us, verbally/mentally/emotionally abuses us. Even in the church. He chose my Sunday school class to come in to... he is not uncomtortable around me...
He does, however, know, that our dd is soon to be baptised, andis taking her from the church in which that is to happen. No matter whatthe case.
Oops, sorry that I misunderstood. I should have read more carefully. Yes, I tend to agree with the Methodist minister. It's not that they are more "laid back", but that they seem to recognize that there are matters outside of the church life that can be meaningful to people.
When we were Baptist, what with our, and the kids, organizations, obligations, etc, we seldom had a night at home together during the week. It was Sunday School meetings, adult choir, childrens choir, men's groups, women's groups, planning groups and prayer meetings, Royal Ambassadors, monthly suppers, etc. When we told the Baptist minister that we were thinking about finding another church, he told us that perhaps our problem was that we didn't get involved in enough of the church activities. I put together a list of things that he thought we should do and it ended up that we would have two Saturday nights per month at home together with the kids. If we had had a girl, we could have added the girl groups to the list too.
The Methodists and others denominations think the home is important too.
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What would concern me more, would be the issues between you and your estranged husband. I think that the two of you need to address these problems, before they become worse. That is what will affect your children, much more than which church they worship God in.
