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Retirees aren't necessarily easily taken advantage of. As for the elderly, I give you two words: cognitive decline.
Not necessarily. Many who get scammed via newer technologies are simply not in step with current technologies. That doesn't mean they're in an overall cognitive decline.
My mom has no problem telling the phone solicitors NO. This includes the political solicitors. She gives them a piece of her mind! It's rather funny listening to her talk about it.
My dad did the same when he was alive, even though I think he enjoyed talking to the callers more than my mom does. They were both tightwads and had really good portfolios.
OP, it sounds like your mom is soft hearted & gullible. And perhaps lonely. It may be kind a hard for her to change at this point.
So I ask this question because of my mother specifically. She is retired and widowed. But she does not live alone. My brother and her mother both live with her. But she is constantly falling prey to telephone solicitors.
She answers every phone call. She talks to everyone who calls. And she seems to buy almost everything any of these phone solicitors try to sell her. She's bought cruises (that she has no intention of using) vitamin supplements, "cures" for diabetes, etc.
When I ask why she bought these things she says it was the only way to get them off the phone.
I can't understand why she would not simply hang up the phone. Is it just politeness from a different generation ?
I put her on the Do Not Call List and I've told her to not answer the phone if she doesn't recognize the number. I've also told her she can just hang up the phone.
Is this an issue other Retiree's have as well ... either themselves, a spouse or parent/sibling ?
I"m sure it can not be unique to her.
Maybe because many of us grew up in a time/place where most people were essentially honest and trustworthy?
Not necessarily. Many who get scammed via newer technologies are simply not in step with current technologies. That doesn't mean they're in an overall cognitive decline.
OP, it sounds like your mom is soft hearted & gullible. And perhaps lonely. It may be kind a hard for her to change at this point.
Probably True. The weird thing is even though I have had conversations and told her it is o.k. to just hang up the phone, she just can't seem to do it. Now, if one of those calls comes in while I'm there, I'll notice her take the phone into her bedroom so she can talk to the soliciters in private. I have no idea what she's been buying lately.
And for those of you wondering, "no", I won't give you her phone number. LOL.
But truthfully, it's good to see this is not an uncommon issue with retirees.
I tried to get some of the charges on her card reversed but was told that it was not a crime because she gave them her credit card number.
She seemed to start getting worse with this issue after her husband passed.
I just wondered if other retirees or children of retirees have had to work with this issue before. And sounds like many of you have.
Thanks sincerely for all the answers and input and sharing your experiences.
Me. I get taken by scam artists these days. Not the really obvious ones, but I trust people when I shouldn't.
For instance: The last TWO times I rented a house by myself - the first one turned out to have dangerous wiring and a drip in the tub that could only be turned off by turning off ALL the water. Landlord refused to fix either - but at least I hadn't signed a lease so I was outta there.
Second one, right after the one above - turned out to be infested with vermin. Rats and mice. Had been for years, according to near by business owners who talked to me about the property. The smell I thought was dirty carpet - was vermin in the walls. I HAD signed a lease there and was stuck for a year. I was also too sick to do anything about it.
I had a damaged piece of furniture. It was an old brass table with the mahogany curved legs that you could fold up. One of the legs had been broken. A guy who was working on a building repair crew promised to fix it for me for $50 up front, $150 total. In the first place - stupidly high amount of money for that particular repair, in the second - paying in advance for that? NO! Then he came back to get the other $100 without the piece, AND I PAID HIM. Never saw the table legs, which he had taken, again. Now I have the table and not even a BROKEN set of legs for it.
I have no idea why I did that but it seemed perfectly reasonable at the time.
Latest: For 30 years, I have done all the auto buying in this family, and nearly all of that for used vehicles. I have NEVER been ripped off on a used car. We have saved tens of thousands of dollars on vehicles. Probably well over 200k compared to buying new.
Until this last time.
Long story short, I paid about $3k for a car that was at best worth about half that, and was probably an unregistered salvage to boot. I got lucky - the car seems to be mechanically sound (maybe) - but it wasn't worth nearly what I paid for it and carries with it multiple risks given the ethics (or rather lack thereof) of the seller. For instance, after putting 300 miles on it I am starting to hear valve clatter. I suspect the guy had put something thick in the oil to hide that. I had asked the mechanic I took it to for servicing to change the oil specifically because I suspected something like that (after the fact), but he misunderstood and just CHECKED the oil and topped it off.
It needs a windshield - it has tiny pitting in the windshield that only shows when the sun is at the "right" angle, then I can't see out of it well because of the way it scatters the light. The paint is fisheyed - he painted over chipping and that is already starting to peel. The trunk lock doesn't match the door lock - so the trunk lid is a replacement. And I don't have a key for it either. I can only open it from inside the car.
I would never have bought this car if I were in my right mind.
But, sadly, I am not in my right mind anymore. The fact that I RECOGNIZE that is not nothing, but its not very helpful either, given that I only recognize my error after the fact.
Fortunately the phone thing is not (so far) an issue as I have absolutely NO QUALMS about hanging up on phone scammers. Plus the do not call list is very effective at keeping them off my back to start with. My son thinks I am loony about not giving my phone number out, but the reason I avoid it at all possible costs - including lying and saying I don't have one - is to keep my phone number out of the hands of scammers, just in case I become susceptible to them without noticing it.
When I'm in my own place again, I plan to have a land-line with a phone that is set up to allow only calls that are specifically enabled through. When this data phone bites the dust, I'll get rid of both it and the service and go to an emergencies-only pay per use flip phone, and my son will be the only person on the planet with that number. The phone I have now is no longer in my name as I transferred the entire plan to my son's name several years ago, once it became patently clear to both of us that I'm not coming back from lala-land.
I already have a trash e-mail account that I virtually ignore, which is used to open forum accounts like this one and for on-line ordering. It is set up to forward e-mails from legitimate sellers (from whom I have made a purchase) to my real e-mail account, everything else just piles up and gets ignored. I see virtually no spam on my "real" account.
I have scam-proofed myself about as much as I can hope to. I'm considering going ahead and making my son payee now so he doesn't have to make that decision later. We'll see.
Because most are trusting. Grew up in a different era.
That is a big part of it, IMO. They may also be taken with the "nice charming young man/woman" and anxious to do what the person perpetuating the scam asks of them. Or the scammer may play on the fears and insecurities that a number of older folks may have, so the senior thinks he/she is avoiding having those fears become reality if he goes along with and falls for the scam. I think it sometimes may be loneliness in the senior who has little contact with family, few if any friends, and no support system. They are happy for the company of the scammer, the attention paid to them by the scammer, and they go along with it because they want to please the "nice young man/woman". And for some seniors, deteriorating mental status may also rob them of the reasoning power to see that a proposition made to them is obviously a scam.
Before the days of Caller ID, when I'd answer and a telemarketer starting rambling on and on about 'donations', I would say, "That's wonderful! I definitely could use financial help, let me give you my address so you can send me a donation." Click
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