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I'm putting this in retirement because I'm 74 and retired and wonder why did I do this and maybe people closer to my age can help me repair it.
I live in a senior apartment complex. I'm not particularly social with my neighbors, always been one to say hello, good morning, how are you..... that kind of thing. But don't play cards or bingo, mainly because I have no interest and prefer staying in my apartment or going out with other friends.
Today, I was very frazzled. It seemed from the minute I got up till my explosion this afternoon, some dumb little thing was going on and as the old saying goes, along came the straw that broke the camel's back. A while ago, a few of the women gathered in the community room for a pot-luck meal. By invitation only. No, I was not invited but would have gone had I been. So that more or less festered in me for a while. One of the attendees mentioned it today and resentment perked its miserable head up in me. Today was the first time I saw the "lead" lady in this pot-luck along with her close friends and I mentioned it, only it got loud (me).
Now I am embarrassed as all get out, and I believe I deserve to be. I feel like a total idiot. I'm sure those ladies from today will have some of their own resentments.
Can I make this better? I know I need to apologize for my childish behavior. I also know I should not discuss my frazzled-state since it had nothing to do with them.
If it will bother you to not apologize, I would do so, but without any expectation of rekindling any kind of relationship. It doesn't sound like they are your cup of tea anyway - why would you have said yes if they asked you?
I'm putting this in retirement because I'm 74 and retired and wonder why did I do this and maybe people closer to my age can help me repair it.
I live in a senior apartment complex. I'm not particularly social with my neighbors, always been one to say hello, good morning, how are you..... that kind of thing. But don't play cards or bingo, mainly because I have no interest and prefer staying in my apartment or going out with other friends.
Today, I was very frazzled. It seemed from the minute I got up till my explosion this afternoon, some dumb little thing was going on and as the old saying goes, along came the straw that broke the camel's back. A while ago, a few of the women gathered in the community room for a pot-luck meal. By invitation only. No, I was not invited but would have gone had I been. So that more or less festered in me for a while. One of the attendees mentioned it today and resentment perked its miserable head up in me. Today was the first time I saw the "lead" lady in this pot-luck along with her close friends and I mentioned it, only it got loud (me).
Now I am embarrassed as all get out, and I believe I deserve to be. I feel like a total idiot. I'm sure those ladies from today will have some of their own resentments.
Can I make this better? I know I need to apologize for my childish behavior. I also know I should not discuss my frazzled-state since it had nothing to do with them.
What would you do?
I think in that boat I'd apologize to those ladies, tell them I don't know what got into me, and then let it go at that.
But I might also wonder why I wasn't invited to that pot luck meal if I wanted to be. I might wonder if it was because I really didn't socialize enough with those ladies for them to know me very well, they didn't know if I'd be interested in participating in a pot luck meal or not, or maybe they just didn't think about me when they planned the event, and it was just an oversight, again, because I'm maybe not around that much and don't express interest in socializing with them.
But if I wanted to be included in these events in the future, I might make the effort to get to know these folks better, maybe talk to the folks and let them know I'm really not a hermit, and would like to be included in some of the things they do.
I'm putting this in retirement because I'm 74 and retired and wonder why did I do this and maybe people closer to my age can help me repair it.
I live in a senior apartment complex. I'm not particularly social with my neighbors, always been one to say hello, good morning, how are you..... that kind of thing. But don't play cards or bingo, mainly because I have no interest and prefer staying in my apartment or going out with other friends.
Today, I was very frazzled. It seemed from the minute I got up till my explosion this afternoon, some dumb little thing was going on and as the old saying goes, along came the straw that broke the camel's back. A while ago, a few of the women gathered in the community room for a pot-luck meal. By invitation only. No, I was not invited but would have gone had I been. So that more or less festered in me for a while. One of the attendees mentioned it today and resentment perked its miserable head up in me. Today was the first time I saw the "lead" lady in this pot-luck along with her close friends and I mentioned it, only it got loud (me).
Now I am embarrassed as all get out, and I believe I deserve to be. I feel like a total idiot. I'm sure those ladies from today will have some of their own resentments.
Can I make this better? I know I need to apologize for my childish behavior. I also know I should not discuss my frazzled-state since it had nothing to do with them.
What would you do?
Just go and do a face to face apology to everyone involved. If they stay mad, its their problem.
I think in that boat I'd apologize to those ladies, tell them I don't know what got into me, and then let it go at that.
But I might also wonder why I wasn't invited to that pot luck meal if I wanted to be. I might wonder if it was because I really didn't socialize enough with those ladies for them to know me very well, they didn't know if I'd be interested in participating in a pot luck meal or not, or maybe they just didn't think about me when they planned the event, and it was just an oversight, again, because I'm maybe not around that much and don't express interest in socializing with them.
But if I wanted to be included in these events in the future, I might make the effort to get to know these folks better, maybe talk to the folks and let them know I'm really not a hermit, and would like to be included in some of the things they do.
Ugh. What a predicament. How loud did you yell? Was the language unladylike? Did you stalk off into your apartment and slam the door. Or was it just minor, letting them know they are rude not to invite everyone. They really ARE rude to hold such a gathering in the common area and keep out some residents who may have wanted to attend. (you)
I think I would apologize to the head lady only and say you had a terrible migraine and was simply "out of your head." Or make up some other awful thing that will excuse your behavior.
Anyway, forget about it. Stuff happens. Getting older ain't always a barrel of laughs.
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