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Old 03-03-2008, 06:39 AM
 
Location: New Orleans Louisiana
156 posts, read 387,958 times
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I recently saw The Bucket List with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman about two older guys who find out they are terminally ill. Without ruining the story for those who haven't seen it they handle the news a little differently than many probably would. I liked the movie but I think some others think that it's too much of a downer to even think about. Do you ever think about what you would do if you ever found out how much longer you have to live? Would you want to know how much longer you have to live?
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Old 03-03-2008, 06:51 AM
 
1,862 posts, read 3,343,406 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GregoryS View Post
I recently saw The Bucket List with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman about two older guys who find out they are terminally ill. Without ruining the story for those who haven't seen it they handle the news a little differently than many probably would. I liked the movie but I think some others think that it's too much of a downer to even think about. Do you ever think about what you would do if you ever found out how much longer you have to live? Would you want to know how much longer you have to live?
Gregory - you always bring up interesting questions!

I didn't see the movie yet, but the way I think about it is that I have done just about everything I've wanted to do, so if I had a few months left, that would be OK. But, I don't think I'd want to know it!!
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Old 03-03-2008, 07:46 AM
 
Location: New Orleans Louisiana
156 posts, read 387,958 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cousinsal View Post
Gregory - you always bring up interesting questions!

I didn't see the movie yet, but the way I think about it is that I have done just about everything I've wanted to do, so if I had a few months left, that would be OK. But, I don't think I'd want to know it!!

Thanks cousin for the compliment. Hope it's not too depressing of subject for some but the movie really was kind of a neat premise (at least I thought so) and I never would have guessed from the title what it was about. I think many would agree with you about not wanting to know though.
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Old 03-03-2008, 07:48 AM
 
18,727 posts, read 33,396,751 times
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Sure, I'd want to know. I must admit, I've done pretty much everything I wanted to, within my power and means. Should I live a longer healthy time, there are some things I'd like to try, but nothing big. I've had the odd life of running around without a plan or responsibilities my whole life, except for "having experiences." I've left quite a trail, and few things not done.
I would certainly want to know if my time was specifically limited- to quit working, spend my savings, make clear arrangements for my dogs... I have seen a lot of people die (in hospice work). I have sort of a Buddhist attitude- not in terms of after-life or lives, but acceptance of things the way they are.
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Old 03-03-2008, 09:11 AM
 
Location: The beautiful Rogue Valley, Oregon
7,785 posts, read 18,830,750 times
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Originally Posted by GregoryS View Post
Do you ever think about what you would do if you ever found out how much longer you have to live? Would you want to know how much longer you have to live?
I spent the last 3 years of my father's life shuttling between my home and family and his home, dealing with the medical, life, insurance, finance issues during his slow descent from home to assisted living to group home to nursing home. I came to know several of his friends in similar situations and served much the same function for them during that time. So I know what the best and worst outcomes look like.

My father had a form of hereditary OPCA (olivopontocerebellar atrophy), which his father and brother also died from (his father's diagnosis was after the fact, based on symptoms and method of death). It looks a lot like Parkinson's disease but doesn't respond to any treatment, primary or palliative. The odds are very good that I carry the same genetic marker. I did have my father's DNA tested, and it is one of the heritable versions. I've not had myself tested, for two reasons:
1. I can't find a place to do it anonymously, and a positive result would NOT be something I want in my medical records; and
2. The test is known for false negatives. So even a negative result can't be taken with a real sigh of relief.

Likewise, my mother and her two brothers all died of colon cancer, and all while they were in their 50s. I'm on a very regular testing schedule for that as well.

So - yes, I've thought about it, and in my heart of hearts, ever time I stumble for no reason or lose words or sentences, I worry that it's starting. Despite the fact that I'm 48, and none of those things are really all that uncommon in my age bracket. So I live a pretty good life - we retired early, moved, built a new house, travel a lot, and don't take life particularly seriously.
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Old 03-03-2008, 09:59 AM
 
Location: Oxygen Ln. AZ
9,319 posts, read 18,749,757 times
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We have a friend that was just about to retire and travel with his wife when he found out he has Pancreatic cancer and it spread to his liver. This is one of the most interesting people we have come across in years. Born in Russia and fled with his family to China until the Japanese invaded. They then came to the USA completely broke. He worked his way through college to become a phamacist. We love his stories. He of course did not take the news laying down and has beaten the cancer back. He and his wife just got back from Costa Rico and went zip lining through the jungle. I would hope to draw some strenghth from our friend and just enjoy the time we have left.
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Old 03-05-2008, 08:47 AM
 
1,862 posts, read 3,343,406 times
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Originally Posted by MotleyCrew View Post
We have a friend that was just about to retire and travel with his wife when he found out he has Pancreatic cancer and it spread to his liver. This is one of the most interesting people we have come across in years. Born in Russia and fled with his family to China until the Japanese invaded. They then came to the USA completely broke. He worked his way through college to become a phamacist. We love his stories. He of course did not take the news laying down and has beaten the cancer back. He and his wife just got back from Costa Rico and went zip lining through the jungle. I would hope to draw some strenghth from our friend and just enjoy the time we have left.
My aunt and uncle saved their money for years and years, and didn't travel or anything. They planned on doing things when they both retired. However, at 62 or so, my uncle got cancer, and was sick until he died at 71. My aunt always said, "do things while you're young - you might not be able to later". So, instead of them enjoying their retirement, they left the family lots of money. They were both such good, good people - no children of their own - and they were great to all the nieces and nephews. But, they were not able to have joy in their retirement. You just never know.
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Old 03-05-2008, 09:34 AM
 
Location: Oxygen Ln. AZ
9,319 posts, read 18,749,757 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cousinsal View Post
My aunt and uncle saved their money for years and years, and didn't travel or anything. They planned on doing things when they both retired. However, at 62 or so, my uncle got cancer, and was sick until he died at 71. My aunt always said, "do things while you're young - you might not be able to later". So, instead of them enjoying their retirement, they left the family lots of money. They were both such good, good people - no children of their own - and they were great to all the nieces and nephews. But, they were not able to have joy in their retirement. You just never know.
How sad. My Aunt and Uncle were also very frugal as well. Never went out to eat, never bought much in the way of furniture. The both died with millions in the bank. Take a trip now and then.
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Old 03-05-2008, 10:01 AM
 
69 posts, read 251,308 times
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I have been taking care of my elderly parents for the past three years as a sole caregiver. I have dealt with lawyers, doctors, financial planners, nursing home staff, assisted living staff, VA, insurance companies, and everything in between. They were scammed out of $12,000, lost all their belongings (long story-another scam job). They have lost their health, dignity and minds. My life lesson in all this: I no longer fear death.
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Old 03-05-2008, 10:14 AM
 
48,502 posts, read 96,867,563 times
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I think the thing I see most often is the young not being financially prepared if one partner dies.That often leads to the survivor being in dire straights as they the saying goes.My wife and I are close to retiremnt and that is one thing I feel good about. If either one dies the other will be as financially secure;barring disaster.As far as death and what you do now that is just not in the cards for us to see;all we can do is be prepared for the future as if we will be here.
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