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I am in the process (planning stage) of setting up a trust for my assets. I have one adult special needs daughter and two 14 year old children.
None of them could administer a trust or be the executor of a will. In considering relatives, the ones I would trust to do this task are all a generation older than me, and less likely to be around or maybe able to do anything of this level of effort when the time comes because of their age and health.
My generation is just a druggie brother who would take all the assets for himself and have a good ol' time. And I just spent most of a year closing out my parent's trust and fought him each step of the way. So he is NOT a candidate for any role.
Looking at the generation of my children's peers in relatives, there are none that manage their own money well, so I would not trust them to manage mine.
So relatives are out, so are friends.
For those that do not use friends or relatives to administer their estates / trusts, how did you choose who? Do you have two people to do it jointly for accountability? I was thinking like a financial manager and an attorney.
Any ideas?
I would forget family. A bank is a good idea. I have an executor now of a family estate and he has made his way through many of our allotted spots. My Grandfather chose the most trustworthy son just didn't know he was taking Shakspearian acting classes on the side. Not sincere. Go w bank always. Make it very simple. You can not trust family and they will take from your brother who may just need a great rehab.
Indeed, the executor has already taken a couple hundred k (that we found out about) from Dad b/c my Dad is not as swift as the executor who loves to buy a lot of homes. It is very sad. I'm sure there will be very little if anything left for the grandkids when the executor is done playing world wide.
letting family be trustee has likely broken up as many families , as one kid playing caretaker has , who steps up to the plate and is the one providing long term care while the others step back .
so many have a mis-conception about trusts making things easy peasy . that can be so far from reality .
this is why i keep saying do not do trusts unless you really need them . they are big money makers for attorneys . they will find a way to utilize one if you let most of them , whether you need them or not . it has become like the lipitor of the estate planning profession .
this is why i think vanguard is making a big mistake pushing clients in to trusts who don't want to start splitting up accounts in to individual accounts . i think it is even a bigger conflict of interest now that they are promoting their trust services so heavily . but heck , i already voted with my money and pulled it out .
Last edited by mathjak107; 10-22-2017 at 02:30 AM..
I naively don't understand how the executor gets to change things his deceased Father put in writing? Grandmother in a nursing home and unable to speak due to stroke. How do I make executor accountable for his weird behavior, ie, moving homes (name wise) around and blatantly taking large cash chunks from my Dad( he on too many meds) who is not supposed to touch this. One of the Uncles (my dad and two other brothers( say I will have to have a lawyer in place second Grandmother passes to attempt to get sneaky exactor to do as his Father wishes for. Is this fantasy? Will I lose money getting a lawyer in that the state all this takes place in?
they do not change things . who ever is the trustee controls the money in and out . it is all to easy to find ways of pocketing more than the others if you are an heir and trustee
I would never wish a trust on anyone after my experience as Trustee
Hopefully we can forego having one....
Put our only sons name as beneficiary on my 401k & bank account.
Slowly turning the 401k into a Roth as we age so he can avoid taxes
cash money & gold in the safe
Help to buy him a house way before-hand (very soon)
He can inherit our electric car pretty easily https://www.dmv.ca.gov/portal/dmv/?1...klists/probate
Something to consider in case it is workable
And you clearly haven't read a word the OP has typed.
There are professional trustees - your attorney may be able to recommend one. Call a few and ask about their services and fees. Some offer different levels of involvement, some offer discounts if you name your financial advisor as staying the one who manages the finances, etc.
Also, your relatives that are older than you, yes they may not be around at some point, but they will probably be around in the near future and could be named as trustees for now if something were to happen. But more likely you will still be here at the point they are not around, then perhaps one of your children would be old enough to do it. You CAN CHANGE your trust at that point. Let your attorney know your concerns. You will probably want to change a few things once your children reach adulthood anyway. Anyone you name as trustee, be sure to check with them ahead of time.
My grandfather elected to have my lawyer father as the exec to my trust fund. I've known the man for 28 years and I totally trust his honesty and business sense ( he's been quite successful in his own right, and a great dad to boot!) I also trust my grandfather's judgement in choosing my father. He didn't make a ton of money being stupid or making dumb decisions.
Just sayin....
And you clearly haven't read a word the OP has typed.
You are confused.
I shared my experience for the benefit of others.
I am fully aware of what a special needs trust is pertaining to her situaiton
I also work with Mentally Ill Adults as a Supervisor
In fact, If my son gets worse (he has schizophrenia) a special needs trust will be our only option
As trustee, part of the huge Trust I administered...encompassed a Special Needs Trust for my BIL
So yes, I am OVERLY familiar with this topic.
Our 27 year old son is showing signs of schizophrenia (talking to himself) but seems to pulling out of it just as my other BIL did around age 29. Had it for about 9 yrs. The other brother was not so lucky
I would've added to it but she got good advice
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