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Old 08-12-2019, 05:37 AM
 
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Searching for our retirement home, we have been focused on over 55 communities. Wondering, how many of you have moved,to a new state, and have not known a soul, and purchased a home in a regular neighborhood.
Were you able to meet people, find clubs to join, or are you happy in your own little world. It seems to me, being in a retirement community, would give you a support system, people watching out for others. Love to hear your thoughts.
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Old 08-12-2019, 05:58 AM
 
Location: Redwood City, CA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marcandme View Post
Searching for our retirement home, we have been focused on over 55 communities. Wondering, how many of you have moved,to a new state, and have not known a soul, and purchased a home in a regular neighborhood.
Were you able to meet people, find clubs to join, or are you happy in your own little world. It seems to me, being in a retirement community, would give you a support system, people watching out for others. Love to hear your thoughts.
Old state: California. New state: Arizona. Didn't know a soul other than our real estate agent and one could argue he has no soul. (Doesn't see himself in the mirror, either. )

We bought a large home in a non-HOA neighborhood, which looks just like the HOA neighborhood nearby. In other words, quality people who don't collect broken-down cars in their front yards don't need HOAs.

We have been meeting people through an assortment of Meetup groups. I even started one of my own for lovers of post-apocalyptic science fiction. The nature of community in the Phoenix metro is such that people rarely hang out in their front yards, so we can go months without seeing a particular neighbor. Privacy is a big thing here. Still, all of us keep an eye out for anything untoward happening, so we have a low-key support system without a Gladys Kravitz or other busybody trying to stir up mischief.

We had some experience in our old neighborhood with retired people with too much time and too little to do trying to cause trouble for others. It seems to me that a 55+ community would be a Petri dish for such people.
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Old 08-12-2019, 10:37 AM
 
Location: Florida
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Look around your own neighborhood. How well does everyone interact. Did you go and introduce yourself to the last person that moved into your block? Why would it be different if you moved?

I think a well established over 55 community could be just like the area you live in now. But I think a new 55 community will be more open and easier to meet people as everyone is new.

Also communities with lots of clubs and people with similar amounts of free time will probably interact better than a community of diverse people. Thus I think you will have better luck in an over 55 community of any age that a mixed neighborhood.
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Old 08-12-2019, 11:45 AM
 
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As I got older I realized that I was becoming more comfortable with those in my own age group. Upon retiring I moved from a very heavily populated city to a very small town one hundred miles away, a bit of a culture shock, but overall not too bad. I do photography as a hobby so the area was perfect for that, rural and quiet, full of creeks, farms, forests, and the Ocean less than a thirty mile drive.

My wife had died a few months into my retirement and I was alone in a new town, it was very difficult to get to know the locals, they had their circle of friends and just weren't looking for any more. Polite enough, but not extending themselves too much either. Fast forward to the point that I wanted to date and hopefully find that special someone. Thanks to online dating sites and the fact that people my age weren't the ones playing games, I did find that person and we've been together eight years, and another hundred miles further south.

Now we are contemplating another move, we're getting old and tired of doing yard work, so we too are thinking of an over 55 development, the trouble is, there are far too few of these in the state. Upon visiting AZ a couple of years ago we did find a gold mine of "oldy housing" in places like Green Valley and the Phoenix burbs. I'd prefer to live around older people just because we can relate to them.

CD relocation forums are still one of the best sites for real time city/neighborhood assessments. We did note a far better social setting in the AZ developments, most of the residents were transplants and easy to start a conversation with.The AZ heat was the barricade to moving there. My present neighborhood is in an older golf community with the homes set back and secluded from each other, no one goes out of their way to be sociable and most are getting long in the tooth. Every place will have it's drawbacks so it's wise to look at it as a balance of good and bad, and be realistic on both counts..
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Old 08-12-2019, 11:52 AM
 
3,211 posts, read 2,984,272 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marcandme View Post
Searching for our retirement home, we have been focused on over 55 communities. Wondering, how many of you have moved,to a new state, and have not known a soul, and purchased a home in a regular neighborhood.
Were you able to meet people, find clubs to join, or are you happy in your own little world. It seems to me, being in a retirement community, would give you a support system, people watching out for others. Love to hear your thoughts.

Personally, I wouldn't want that...I prefer to be left alone by neighbors, so I'd stay out of that kind of community. But, if I had an elderly neighbor who needed and wanted to be watched, I would do that of course.


My sister moved into a 55+ community and says she hates it because all her neighbors are dying off. She tends to be a bit dramatic, though, so I'm not sure about that.
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Old 08-12-2019, 12:07 PM
 
Location: NMB, SC
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If you have never lived in one then rent for at least a year to see if that is what you really want.
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Old 08-12-2019, 12:12 PM
 
Location: Wasilla, AK
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We moved into a 55+ community in Arizona when we retired. We fit right in immediately and made lots of friends and had lots of activities we got involved in. What had us scurrying back home after 15 months was the summer heat and my wife constantly flying back home to visit family. We did keep the house and decided to snowbird. Other than the heat, we had absolutely no problem adjusting to Arizona.
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Old 08-12-2019, 12:24 PM
 
Location: A blue island in the Piedmont
34,109 posts, read 83,054,663 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marcandme View Post
Searching for our retirement home, we have been focused on over 55 communities. ...
It seems to me, being in a retirement community, would give you a support system,
people watching out for others.
Substitute could or even should for would... and you're golden.
Is someone advising you otherwise?

Quote:
Wondering, how many of you have moved,to a new state, and have not known a soul,
and purchased a home in a regular neighborhood. Were you able to meet people,
find clubs to join...
In an older area with ready access to the X and Y and Z
that constitute your interests and needs.

So... just don't pick the wrong 55+ or the wrong regular neighborhood.

Last edited by MrRational; 08-12-2019 at 12:50 PM..
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Old 08-12-2019, 12:45 PM
 
1,205 posts, read 937,322 times
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My folks moved from a home in the woods in Michigan to an over 55 condo building in Florida. They never got involved in the groups, but did develop some good friendships with the people who lived near them. Mom went to the pool a lot but never tried to socialize at the pool. They were happy living quietly and sticking to themselves and a few friends. Relatives lived in the same complex, and were more social, enjoying the group gatherings. They both seemed to like it quite well, although approaching it differently.
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Old 08-12-2019, 01:24 PM
 
Location: Elsewhere
88,647 posts, read 84,928,808 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TMSRetired View Post
If you have never lived in one then rent for at least a year to see if that is what you really want.
That is what my sister and her husband did. They decided they liked the complex they rented in and bought a unit.

She has a nice place, but it is not for me. I have kids in my neighborhood and people of all ages, and I prefer that.

Another person I know definitely wants to retire to one. She wants to be only with people her own age, she says.

It's up to the individual.
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