Find it difficult to meet Hispanic Neighbours (San Antonio, Post: insurance, homes)

[The Man in SATX]

I am hispanic and I know if I saw you struggling with a light bulb or whatever you are attempting to do, loaded with the knowledge of your significant other being away, I would have offered to help out with those things. But, as you have pointed out, there are many people who do not even help out. The point being, and as I said before, society has changed drastically to where.. our kids, do not communicate face-to-face, they communicate with their cell phones, going on line and talking in chat rooms or texting each other. I mean .. your daughter comes in and says I am going to go talk with my girlfriend, walks to the computer and starts chatting in IMs. Well back in our days.. we had to walk over to their house to do that and while doing that you ran across people on your walk over there. So people knew each other, stopping by to talk to neighbors and such. My point is that people no longer have to walk to another person's house to communicate. Back in my day we used the phone when we had to, If I tried to talk on the phone as long as the kids do today, my parents woulda been po'd citing the "the phone is not yours" rule to me.

This is off subject as pfc has stated but I think it has a lot to do with why people do not help each other out anymore or dont even turn an eye to one another. I dont think it runs just in the Hispanic culture.. but it is a growing "Amercian Culture". Why go outside and talk when you can turn on your computer or use your cell phone and do that.

[CreekKnoll]

Originally Posted by firstclassflyer

We brought some homemade tamales (wife is Mexican, I'm Gringo...AKA "Anglo") over to a lot of my neighbors (Hispanic, Black and Gringo) when we first moved in....boy that was a hit. Made sure to save some for myself!

We moved from SoCal...don't hate me either.

No tamales for meh

[sa_native1977]

Sorry to hear about the difficutly in meeting your neighbors, and I'm sure it's no fun with your SO away on deployment. I agree with the other posters who say this is a national trend, not a local issue. So many of my neighbors move in and out [and I don't live in a "bad" neighborhood] that I think some people have stopped trying to get to know the new families on the block. I also think people are just plain busy these days. I don't take it personnally.

I'm sure having your SO on deployment is hard, too. But, honestly, this is the life you've chosen. I have family members in the military [Air Force] and they have a pretty sweet deal, with the great bennies and all. I wish Uncle Santa would give me a tax-free $10,000 bonus for Christmas!

[Goominim]

Hi! Interesting discussion here. I'm hispanic and have waved at white neighbors in my block only to receive blank stares. That has happened multiple times throughout my nine years here. I just shrug it off as well...people that don't wave. ;-) As for the post about having neighbors that need help with light bulbs, lawn mowers, etc. - heck ya! I'll help anyone, and I have. There are probably multiple reasons why a response hasn't happened, but I also feel that it's just a change in society as a whole. Heck with cable TV, computers, Playstations, cell phones everywhere... it's amazing people talk to anyone face to face anymore. Now that I'm thinking about it, the thing that shocks me the most are the kids and their games (Playstations or whatnot). When I was a kid, my parents could not keep me INSIDE. I was always riding my bike or playing outside with friends. I wouldn't even want to come in for dinner! heheh.. That doesn't seem to be the case with kiddos these days. Ah well, I guess it IS the new millenium. ;-)

[Goominim]

Hey! My paragraphs didn't work. ???

[missmypfc]

sa_native1977,
I know I said I was done posting, and frankly, after reading your post, I needed ten minutes to calm myself down. First of all, you are opening up a whole other can of worms talking about military people like that... I never once complained about my life-- we were not even discussing the pros and cons of a military lifestyle. Second, my husband does not receive ANY bonus currently and we paid a pretty penny in taxes. Some do get bonuses, but no everyone, and not everyone's are tax-free. You are speaking in generalities of which you know nothing. Third, you, too, can "choose" to join if you want to partake in our great "bennies", as you call them. Are you willing to go to war at a moment's notice, move your family every two years, and be separated time and time again? My husband has worked hard for his "sweet deal", as you call it. Nothing was given to us. And my son, an enlisted Marine, is enjoying his "sweet deal", too. He barely makes enough to pay rent. I think we better stick to the topic title, because you are going to offend many people in San Antonio with this kind of talk.

[nikip]

I agree with Mspfc many people think about the miltary as freebies but they just don't know. We have struggled just like others if not more my hubby got injured and still don't receive all he should get. We as spouses have to deal with long deployments and new schools, moving jobs and communites that are sometimes un accepting to different cultures. I have felt your isolation time and time again and I am a friendly person not only have I felt your isolation my kids have in school with kids not in Dods schools hanging in clicks and my kids feeling isolated as well this is no free ride. But we love supporting our country and will continue doing it no matter the cost . I know that we will meet others if we continue being friendly. Mspfc let me know if you need anything I would be happy to be of support. I also want to say I don't think that all are unfriendly it might just be where we live

Blessings

[hadleyzoo]

I agree with the last 2 posters on this one sanative. This is a whole 'nuther can of worms.

My DH has NEVER got a bonus in his 22 years of service.

I could go on about our "great bennies" you mentioned, but I could write a novel on that and I feel my blood-pressure going up...which I've been trying for 2 weeks to get an appointment to get seen and am told daily "call back tomorrow to see if anything opens up on our books". Gotta love these great bennies...

[Merovee]

I am sure the culture of the military is far different than that of many of the places one can be stationed at. I have heard that living on base is not all that cheery either for everyone and there is much competition between soldier's wives, not to neglect the fact that many a servicewoman does exist.

As far as the culture down here, as another poster pointed out, getting to know the neighbors does not play a very big part in the social lives of many. Growing up I remember my parents being very friendly to the elderly black lady next door, and somewhat friendly to the also elderly white couple next door, but as far as the other neighbors they really had no relations with them at all. I do remember going over and in turn my parents hosting family, their friends from work, and their friends from church quite often.

I would not take it to heart that your neighbors have thus far have not been reciprocating your friendly advances and I am sure it has nothing to do with anyones ethnicity specifically and think perhaps not getting to know your neighbors might be more of the norm in many places than the close knit communities that the military might contain. Like someone else posted, if you really want to make friends keep trying, but I would also add in that you should perhaps focus on one or just a few of the neighbors instead of all of them. Neighborhood wide dinners for sure are not going to be scheduled anytime soon if ever.

[els565]

As I read these replies, I am just getting mad! What is up with the "blank stares" from people when waved to??? I am so sick of living in neighborhoods and not knowing my neighbors.

Why are we such isolationists? I just moved into my current neighborhood a few months ago and only one neighbor has dropped by to say hello on moving day. That is awful.

I'm just sick of people looking at me like I have 2 heads when I try to be friendly.