Thinking About Moving to San Diego Instead of the New York City Area (NY/NJ/CT) (income, living in)

[sgw99]

I don't live in San Diego (also hoping to relocate there!) but I've lived in central NJ, northern NJ, and NYC (upper west side) as well as southern california - and some other places! I've moved too much, for various reasons.

I think it may come down to how important it is to you to be close to your family. Sure, people will come visit you and you can visit them, but you won't be able to see them nearly as often as if you live in driving distance. Elderly relatives, relatives with young kids, or on tight budgets, etc. may not be able to come at all. So, it puts more onus on you to visit them. This hasn't been a big issue for me or my husband since our families are scattered around the world, but we do end up spending a fair amount of money and vacation days traveling to visit family.

I didn't miss Northeast winters one bit when I lived in LA. Others may feel differently. I'm an early morning runner and it was so nice to not have to contend with ice, wind, freezing rain, etc!

Regarding NYC, your experience may differ, but I actually found it less stressful to live very close to NYC or in the city itself rather commuting from a farther-out suburb. Especially if you work long hours, it just makes your day feel LONG. I commuted by train from Princeton to mid-town Manhattan for about 8 months, and I don't really recommend it. It was hard to find time to exercise, cook dinner, etc. on weekdays. I preferred living closer to my job. I'm also not one to stay out all hours (especially now that I'm a mom!), but there were a lot of nice things about living in Manhattan where everything is so convenient. I could walk or take a short subway ride to run almost any errand, meet friends for dinner, run or bike in central park, go to a museum or show, etc. I was in my 20s and had two roommates who were friends I knew from college. It was fun and we looked out for each other. I don't mind crowds though, so the density of New York didn't bother me.

All that said, I do prefer the West Coast to the Northeast in terms of lifestyle, scenery and outdoor activities which is part of why we're looking to relocate to the San Diego area if we can make it work.

Good luck with your decision!

[sdurbanite]

Originally Posted by NoTimeToTalk

Hi. I'm considering an opportunity to move to the San Diego area instead of the New York City area (NY/NJ/CT). Career opportunities are okay in either of the two areas, and the income will be roughly the same (around $115,000). I'm currently in NJ, but not in the NYC region. Please tell me what you think is best given my situation.

- Single male, late twenties
- Want reasonable access to the city without living in it (I like peace and quiet in a suburban home)
- Like warm and sunny weather, but also like experiencing the four seasons
- Like relaxed and laid-back attitudes, but also appreciate sophistication and ambition
- Eventually want kids and do not want to have to move to a new metropolitan area
- Enjoy a healthy, active lifestyle with outdoor activities
- Like beach views and the beach environment, but also like being able to go to a busy downtown area
- Whole family is in the NYC area
- Don't want to be in the rat race and prefer a lower-stress day-to-day living experience
- Don't want to spend all day in the office and commuting to the office
- Like having a car
- Want to own a single family detached home with a garage in the near future

Thank you in advance.

Gee, I wish I had your problem. I love both places. For the lifestyle the that you are seeking , SD should fit the bill just fine. I've gone to NYC every year for the last few years and I can't get enough of that place. But everyone says it's a big difference between visiting and living there. I'm actually going again in May!

[Cardiff Kook]

did the OP say what he did for a living? is he self employed or did he get a job lined up in SD for 115k already?

[sschibuola]

Originally Posted by NoTimeToTalk

. . . . I guess I would have a different perspective if I had my own family.

Not to sound facetious, but you are:

- young
- enjoy a healthy lifestyle, so presumably in pretty good shape
- earn a good living
- are very family-oriented, mature, and interested in kids.


I believe this is what's referred to as "a catch". I don't think you'll have any problem having your own family here. It's exactly what happened to me when I moved out here from the East as a 30-year old single male.

So now my immediate family is here, my wife's (and therefore my) family is here and my extended family is back East. Yes it's a little tough - maybe a little easier for me as we are a bunch of immigrants (me, twice over!) so I also have family in Europe . . it's just a part of our family DNA. But my mom gets a built-in automatic yearly winter vacation in a very nice place, and I go back too. And thanks to Skype etc. the whole world is smaller. It works.

YMMV but it's worth considering.

[robertpolyglot]

A lot of Easterners who get the urge to move to the large Pacific Coast cities, particularly those with all of their ties in the East, are still caught in a tug-of-war when they get out West. They like the beauty and atmosphere, but miss the social and intellectual aspects of the Northeast. My 2 cents.

[sschibuola]

Originally Posted by robertpolyglot

A lot of Easterners who get the urge to move to the large Pacific Coast cities, particularly those with all of their ties in the East, are still caught in a tug-of-war when they get out West. They like the beauty and atmosphere, but miss the social and intellectual aspects of the Northeast. My 2 cents.

Speaking as an Eastern transplant - yes - but a few days like yesterday and today (in February!!) bake that right out of you for a while!

[tonyinsd]

Originally Posted by robertpolyglot

A lot of Easterners who get the urge to move to the large Pacific Coast cities, particularly those with all of their ties in the East, are still caught in a tug-of-war when they get out West. They like the beauty and atmosphere, but miss the social and intellectual aspects of the Northeast. My 2 cents.

Nope. The so called intellectuals in the DC area were in my experience, often people who wanted to appear smart. But once you got beyond the talking points they picked up from whatever organization they were programmed by, they were true idiots.

For example, I remember one doofus who kept on going on about how "real America" was small towns and farms.

I asked him a simple question. If 90-99 percent of America is something other than what he defined as "real America," how did he reconcile that?

That kind of crap is what passes for intellectualism. They can take that and shove it where the sun don't shine.

And the sun don't shine a lot more back there than here.

[NoTimeToTalk]

Thank you for all your responses! They are very helpful and have given me a lot to think about. To answer someone else's question regarding employment, this is an internal transfer opportunity for me.

Given my ideal home living conditions and my disdain for long commute times, it seems like San Diego is best in that respect. On the other hand, my whole family is on the East Coast. Gratefully, I still have some time to think about this.

[NoTimeToTalk]

To be honest, I think the only things I don't like about San Diego are the lack of seasons and how far it is from my family.

[moved]

Originally Posted by NoTimeToTalk

To be honest, I think the only things I don't like about San Diego are the lack of seasons and how far it is from my family.

Then maybe you should reconsider moving here.