Should a family of 5 with small kids not even consider living in SF? (Oakland: to rent, crime rate)

[Tarheelkid]

My spouse has a job offer in SF and we’ll be relocating at the beginning of the year. His job is not far from the Montgomery Bart station. Our top two in finding a place to live are:

*Family-friendly
I have three kids under 5 so want to find stuff for us to do (i.e. recreation programs, parks, preschool options) and good elementary school options (not private).

*Decent commute to SF
My husband doesn’t mind driving but after living in the East Bay for a few years in college, I think we need to live near a Bart station/public transportation.

Sorry to be a cliché! I know EVERYONE is looking for this.

Can you all suggest places to consider & why? Our budget will be about 4k to rent. We’re currently looking into the Lamoraga area and also Mill Valley based on advice and research here but are there any other places? After reading this forum, it seems we probably shouldn’t even consider SF? I know the schools are spotty but are there other reasons? There’s a lot in SF that appeals to me, but I wonder since I’ll usually have three small kids in tow if that means I probably won’t be able to take advantage of what SF has to offer and that I should just stick to the 'burbs. Thoughts?

[clongirl]

I wouldn't consider the City now days because there's a very strong anti-kid/anti family vibe. If you can handle people calling you a breeder, rolling their eyes at you because your kid steps in front of them, or you have the guts to dare bring your kid into a restaurant, supermarket, or use a stroller on the sidewalks and not mind the hard looks and eye rolling then go for it! There are of course more family friendly neighborhoods but unless you have a parking spot then try to imagine getting home from the supermarket with two sleeping kids in the back, 5 bags of groceries, and a great parking spot a mere two blocks away! (that was my life for a long time!). My kids were born/raised partially in the City, and honestly, I just wouldn't do it now days...too stressful.

The towns you mentioned (Lafayette, Moraga, Orinda...or Mill Valley) would all be excellent choices (I don't have the lowdown on Mill Valley though). Great schools, really welcoming, family friendly with an amazing amount of choice for kids activities/classes, safe bike trails and hiking, and the weather is perfect. The Bart runs through here and your husband will be home in about half an hour. Walnut Creek would be another good option. The downside of course is that it's not urban (if that's what you're looking for) and even though there are restaurants, stuff can be very dead after 8:30. My husband and I tend to venture into Oakland/Berkeley a lot now days when we want fine dining, concerts, foreign films etc. The upside is that Lamorinda is semi-rural and there's tons of wildlife and nature all around.

[dalparadise]

Mill Valley seems like the ideal place to raise a family, given your parameters. Golden Gate Transit provides convenient, reliable transit to downtown, on nice, long-haul-type buses. Or, the Sausalito ferry could work some days, when he wants a change of pace and scenery. A chance to work in The City and live in Marin is the best of both worlds for a lot of people. Good luck.

[beb0p]

Originally Posted by Tarheelkid

After reading this forum, it seems we probably shouldn’t even consider SF? I know the schools are spotty but are there other reasons? There’s a lot in SF that appeals to me, but I wonder since I’ll usually have three small kids in tow if that means I probably won’t be able to take advantage of what SF has to offer and that I should just stick to the 'burbs. Thoughts?

Schools and the high cost of housing are pretty much the only reasons families w/kids bypass SF. If schools and cost are not issues for you, by all means, I think your family will enjoy SF. The more kids friendly nabes are in Noe Valley, Richmond District, Sunset District, Bernal Heights, etc, etc.

With regard to burbs, not all burbs are created equal. Lamorinda are great burbs with great schools, but the area is dead. It's a rural community smacked in the middle of a bustling bay area. If that's your cup of tea, fine. But if you're more of an urban person, and it sounds like you are, I'd suggest you check out Walnut Creek and Piedmont if you decide to live out east.

[Venom Point]

I would not recommend SF since you have so many kids. San Mateo sounds like a better place with your budget. mod cut

[0'Farrell]

The city is not a place for kids.

[jsba]

Oakland is actually very nice and kid friendly. Its also much closer for things for your kids to do like Fairyland at Lake merrit, the Oakland zoo, which is really the best run zoo in the area, though i would suggest seeing them all, Chabot space and science center as well as the Lawrence hall of science in Berkeley. Rockridge is of course nice and very family friendly as well as areas like Piedmont ave and less urban feeling Redwood Heights. Elementary schools in these areas a quite good though the quality of schools dips in Oakland past middle school.

Other areas I would look would be the city of Piedmont itself excellent schools and its basically just a part of Oakland so all the same attractions and benefits of the city.

Walnut Creek as mentioned is a good choice for the urbanish type of living. Outside of the city but a very nice downtown with lots of shopping.

[Venom Point]

Originally Posted by jsba

Oakland is actually very nice and kid friendly. Its also much closer for things for your kids to do like Fairyland at Lake merrit, the Oakland zoo, which is really the best run zoo in the area, though i would suggest seeing them all, Chabot space and science center as well as the Lawrence hall of science in Berkeley. Rockridge is of course nice and very family friendly as well as areas like Piedmont ave and less urban feeling Redwood Heights. Elementary schools in these areas a quite good though the quality of schools dips in Oakland past middle school.

Other areas I would look would be the city of Piedmont itself excellent schools and its basically just a part of Oakland so all the same attractions and benefits of the city.

Walnut Creek as mentioned is a good choice for the urbanish type of living. Outside of the city but a very nice downtown with lots of shopping.

I wish you would be real with people seeking advice. Oakland is ranked as having some of the WORST performing schools in the state. Not to mention the crime rate is outrageous. I went to U.C. Berkeley and I know Oakland like the back of my hand. The lake used to constantly be in the paper as an area to avoid due to all of the rapes and robberies and from reports it looks like not much has changed. The Zoo is a fortress, outside you're in East Oakland not far from the ghetto. Don't get lost or you might find yourself in Seminary surrounded by thugs.

[18Montclair]

Originally Posted by Venom Point

I went to U.C. Berkeley and I know Oakland like the back of my hand.

Credibility FAIL.

But I do find your refusal to accept defeat to be quite entertaining.

[jsba]

Sorry Venom but I am being very honest with OP. She asked what areas would be good for kids, all of these areas would be good for kids. I mentioned that the schools above middle school dip off but that our elementary schools in those areas were actually good. The zoo is actually not near seminary at all its off of 98th and golf links. actually if the OP exits the zoo at 106th and heads straight her and her family will be treated to a very nice drive up Malcolm ave. and be able to see some of the most wonderful views of the bay area as well as some spectacular homes in the upper hills. Rather than spew hate at the city of Oakland maybe you could participate and give the OP more than just dated and false accusations about the city of Oakland and provide her with suitable and family friendly areas in the bay area for her and her family to live. I suggested Oakland for its large amount a family friendly activities and urban lifestyle. The city is centrally located making it easy for people to get to and from.

beb0p, i hope you find my actual insight helpful and best of luck to you wherever you decide.