Dating in Seattle (Vancouver, Bellevue, Renton: fit in, theatre, high school) - Washington (WA) -Seattle and King County Suburbs - City-Data Forum

kattwoman2 · 06-23-2008, 04:48 PM

I'm in my early 20's and another reason why I want to get away from the area I'm in right now is that a lot of the guys here are pigs who want to talk about NASCAR, get drugged & drunk, and have sex with easy girls that drop out of high school and work in fast food. I have nothing against social drinking, but there's a difference between social drinking and getting so drunk that your sister starts to look hot.

I want to be in an area where people will talk about a wide variety of things from silly stuff that's fun to talk about to deeper stuff like politics, religion, the world in general, unverse, theories, etc. I was hoping that there would be a strong dating scene in Seattle, but I'm not sure from what I've read so far.

So, my questions are: Are there any good places for someone in their 20's to go to meet people (even a little older) who talk about more than just NASCAR, Power Rangers, and whether or not they would bang Britney Spears? Should I try dating sites instead to meet guys in the area due to the Seattle freeze? Are the guys a little more mature in Seattle or are they like the guys in the South and in England where they would make out with you before knowing your name and where their pick-up lines are, "Hey, wanna f**k?"

Or should I just save the idea of finding a guy that wants more than just sex for the guys in Vancouver?

AzDreamer · 06-23-2008, 05:06 PM

I've lived in a lot of places and nowhere have I seen anything like what you described. You probably won't find it in Seattle unless you look for it.

cobolt · 06-23-2008, 05:39 PM

No kidding. Wonder where the heck this girl lives? Scary!!

LIS123 · 06-23-2008, 05:57 PM

They say Women have the numbers in their favor in Seattle. Perhaps this is related to the fact that a High Tech economy tends to employ more Males than Females.

Supposedly, it's tough to make new friends in the area, though you should interact with a more sophisticated crowd than you're used to. Women in general tend to do well in the realm of online dating, so that could be a start.

kattwoman2 · 06-23-2008, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cobolt

No kidding. Wonder where the heck this girl lives? Scary!!

Well, one of the places is in Northeast England. The guys there would get drunk and then walk up to me. Some of them would have nice conversations like, "Where are you from? Oh! I hear America is nice what are you doing in England?" Then, about 10 minutes later they say, "Hey, wanna f**k me?" I've also ran into a couple of guys where I would be dancing with some friend, then suddenly this guy comes up from behind and starts not just grinding, but doing it like he's trying to shove something up my behind. I've also had another guy start trying to make out with my neck when I was on the dancefloor before he even knew my name! I turned around, said, "hold on a minute" and then I walked away. There are some really awesome guys there, but a lot of the single ones I met that were interested in me just wanted sex.

The other place is around the Appalachia region. However, this area is a bit different for me. I mean, everyone has their own experiences so someone might say, "I lived there and that's never happened to me." That's fine, but what I've seen down here are some guys (not all mind you) who actually say, "I want a woman that's dumb so that way I can tell her what to do." They usually do go for the skinny blonds who either act dumb and/or have wealthy parents. I sort of fit into a size 10 brunette with a degree, so I have been called an "ugly, fat***** nerd" even though I believe differently. I'm not a super model, but supposedly I sort of resemble Lucy Lawless and Lara Croft if you believe most of my friends and some of the strangers. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but I am currently in a small town with very little to offer job wise, money wise, dating wise, and social wise. If not for my family I probably wouldn't be living here at all.

Not all the guys are like this. There are some sweet guys, but some of them are gay (nothing wrong with that, but it means I can't date them) and others are already taken or just want to be friends (which is fine too). I mean, I know there are guys everywhere who might fit what I described above, but I was wondering if it's swarming with them in Seattle or if there are more decent guys. I'm not looking for a supermodel, but I also don't want a guy whose going to mooch off of me while trying to get his heavy metal career going and lives on someone's couch.

LIS123 · 06-23-2008, 08:42 PM

Seattle should have plenty of intelligent men who are ambitious in their careers. Every place has weirdos, but you should have nice choices if you put effort in meeting people. It may seem like some men 'just want to be friends,' but don't bet on it if they're single. They may not be vulgar like the some of the men described above, but it's certainly possible that they're interested in dating you (but don't have the courage to ask).

bella25 · 06-24-2008, 11:33 AM

Kattwoman2~~~

I know exactly how you're feeling. I'm actually looking at a bunch of different cities to see where are the single, nice, professional men are at.

I was raised in Vegas and the majority of guys only want the one night stand type of ladies. I guess when you're surrounded by the "barbie" type girls and the guys have many gorgeous girls to choose from, it makes it more difficult for the avg girl.

I just saw a map that said there are tons of single men compared to women in Vegas. I guess that is true but, the quality of men in Vegas is low.

It would be nice to find a city with good quality single men :-)

wannabeaTexan · 06-24-2008, 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kattwoman2

Well, one of the places is in Northeast England. The guys there would get drunk and then walk up to me. Some of them would have nice conversations like, "Where are you from? Oh! I hear America is nice what are you doing in England?" Then, about 10 minutes later they say, "Hey, wanna f**k me?" I've also ran into a couple of guys where I would be dancing with some friend, then suddenly this guy comes up from behind and starts not just grinding, but doing it like he's trying to shove something up my behind. I've also had another guy start trying to make out with my neck when I was on the dancefloor before he even knew my name! I turned around, said, "hold on a minute" and then I walked away. There are some really awesome guys there, but a lot of the single ones I met that were interested in me just wanted sex.

The other place is around the Appalachia region. However, this area is a bit different for me. I mean, everyone has their own experiences so someone might say, "I lived there and that's never happened to me." That's fine, but what I've seen down here are some guys (not all mind you) who actually say, "I want a woman that's dumb so that way I can tell her what to do." They usually do go for the skinny blonds who either act dumb and/or have wealthy parents. I sort of fit into a size 10 brunette with a degree, so I have been called an "ugly, fat***** nerd" even though I believe differently. I'm not a super model, but supposedly I sort of resemble Lucy Lawless and Lara Croft if you believe most of my friends and some of the strangers. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but I am currently in a small town with very little to offer job wise, money wise, dating wise, and social wise. If not for my family I probably wouldn't be living here at all.

Not all the guys are like this. There are some sweet guys, but some of them are gay (nothing wrong with that, but it means I can't date them) and others are already taken or just want to be friends (which is fine too). I mean, I know there are guys everywhere who might fit what I described above, but I was wondering if it's swarming with them in Seattle or if there are more decent guys. I'm not looking for a supermodel, but I also don't want a guy whose going to mooch off of me while trying to get his heavy metal career going and lives on someone's couch.

I think Seattle is going to be just like any other place. I can't imagine that any area will have guys like you described "swarming" around. If you are looking for someone to date at a club, same thing is going to happen to you.

Just two days ago, I was walking in the WalMart parking lot, not in a great mood anyway from having to be in the Renton WalMart, and some guy stopped for me to walk across the parking lot. As I was passing, he used every obscene word he could think of to describe me and what he wanted to "do" to me. Of course all guys are not like that, just like I don't believe they are all like that anywhere you go.

I had a guy try to put his hand up my skirt when dancing at a club before (in this area), so I haven't worn a skirt out to a club since and that happened 10 years ago. Point being, I would say don't expect anything to be different if that is the kind of experience you're getting at clubs. Somebody correct me if I'm wrong, but I would think you might have better luck depending on the type of club you go to as well. Something like that may not happen at The Parlor in Bellevue, but very well could at Ibiza or J&M Cafe in Seattle.

Also, the way you describe yourself, you likely will have black men interested in you. They certainly won't think you are skinny.

cobolt · 06-24-2008, 12:05 PM

Right....even professional men can act like A$$es once they get a few drinks in them or whatever. Doesn't matter where they are, what city, blah blah. My suggestion would be to get involved in activities that don't center around drinking and meat market clubs. For instance, hiking and outdoor activities are a real big deal in the PacNW and you can join a hiking group. Or a group that gets together for movies, theatre, whatever. I think you're more likely to find quality men in those groups where you are doing something you enjoy anyway, rather than clubbing or going to all the cool hangouts.

5chevin5 · 06-24-2008, 06:11 PM

I dont normally comment on posts that are about dating or making friends or the chances of getting "frozen",but I would recommend not thinking about what might happen in a negative way. If those thoughts are in your sub-conscience even before you have moved to Seattle, it may be something that manifests in how you meet/communicate with people on an outward appearance? It goes with the law of averages that as we mature and find ourselves with different needs or different things to offer a potential mate, it is true that the dudes (and girls for that matter) in Seattle are considered somewhat well educated and career minded. As others have stated, meeting someone in a night club would be as successful as trying to find a tofu burger in a butchers shop.

I have read several of your posts kattwoman and its sounds as if you are already making a plan b to find a date going to Vancouver? I would recommend just putting that outta your head. Go to Seattle without a care in the world and allow things to develop "organically". There is enough stress about moving with everything that can happen, why add dating to the list? I always found that when I was "looking" for someone to date or meet...I found bad people, when I didnt think about the opposite sex, great ladies would walk into my life and the rest is history....

Just go with the flow...there is no perfect answer.
Be yourself and the right person will find you..

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