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Right after college, a college friend (good acquaintance is a better word) with whom I had classes asked me to be his "best man." What are you going to say? So I said ok. There was a girl I was going out with at the time, but this was not known to him and his new wife. My friend's future wife also went to college with us. Her sister was going to be the maid of honor. BTW, the mother-in-law rivaled the best of sitcom meddlesome New Yorkers.
When I arrived to the wedding, I brought my date. The mother, the New Yorker, was mortified and kept giving my date dirty looks throughout the event. I think my friend and new wife sent a thank you note for my gift, but they cut me off immediately after the wedding.
It was obvious the mother-in-law and, possibly his wife, thought they had "carte blanche" to make this a matchmaking event. Is that how you read it? Do people actually also try to make the wedding party an opportunity to pair people off? Do you find it distasteful?
Eh, my husband and I were plotting to set his best friend up with his sister...BUT, we made them both aware of it ahead of time. lol That way they could voice objections.
To me, the faster his sister is set up with someone, the faster my MIL leaves me the ___ alone.
Right after college, a college friend (good acquaintance is a better word) with whom I had classes asked me to be his "best man." What are you going to say? So I said ok. There was a girl I was going out with at the time, but this was not known to him and his new wife. My friend's future wife also went to college with us. Her sister was going to be the maid of honor. BTW, the mother-in-law rivaled the best of sitcom meddlesome New Yorkers.
When I arrived to the wedding, I brought my date. The mother, the New Yorker, was mortified and kept giving my date dirty looks throughout the event. I think my friend and new wife sent a thank you note for my gift, but they cut me off immediately after the wedding.
It was obvious the mother-in-law and, possibly his wife, thought they had "carte blanche" to make this a matchmaking event. Is that how you read it? Do people actually also try to make the wedding party an opportunity to pair people off? Do you find it distasteful?
When you received your invitation, was it addressed to you only, or did it mention you could bring a guest? If it didn't specifically state you were allowed a guest, they may have been irritated by you bringing an uninvited guest - and it has nothing to do with "matchmaking".
When you received your invitation, was it addressed to you only, or did it mention you could bring a guest? If it didn't specifically state you were allowed a guest, they may have been irritated by you bringing an uninvited guest - and it has nothing to do with "matchmaking".
This is axactly what I was thinking.
That said, if you had a girlfriend and weren't invited with a guest they were also extremely rude.
No, they didn't give you dirty looks because they were trying to matchmake. They were giving you dirty looks because you brought an uninvited guest without telling them. Have you any idea how long it takes to put together a seating chart, how much a wedding costs per head etc etc???
Why agree to be best man for someone that you don't even know well enough to tell you have a girlfriend? That is weird.
Right after college, a college friend (good acquaintance is a better word) with whom I had classes asked me to be his "best man." What are you going to say?
Hereis where you made the mistake. You say "no." Not rudely, but you don't accept to be someone's best man if you do not feel you are close enough to them for the honor!
Regarding your questions, I do not think people regularly expect to set the best man up with the maid of honor. I could be wrong, but my wife and I never gave thought to that.
Actually, we didn't even do a traditional "head table" because we wanted our wedding party to be able to enjoy the reception with their dates/spouses.
^I was just talking about the head table thing in another thread. Separating your nearest and dearest from their dates/SOs on a day that supposed to be about love is one of the most asinine traditions out there! I tried to convince a friend not to do it, but she wouldn't listen. We're doing a sweetheart table.
Hereis where you made the mistake. You say "no." Not rudely, but you don't accept to be someone's best man if you do not feel you are close enough to them for the honor!
Correct. I've thought about that. I was a complete waste of my time. He didn't use his older brother because they didn't get along. He transferred into my university at about the half-way point, had numerous classes with me, and we would go off-campus to lunch about twice a week.
I did believe I wrote 2 on the RSVP. I don't think I would overlook that.
I did believe I wrote 2 on the RSVP. I don't think I would overlook that.
It doesn't matter what you wrote on the invitation; how was the invitation addressed? Unless it listed your girlfriend's name, or said "and guest", she was no invited. (Yes, it is rude not to invite anyone without a guest, but that's another topic.)
You can't get an invitation to a wedding addressed to only you and assume it means you can bring other people.
It doesn't matter what you wrote on the invitation; how was the invitation addressed? Unless it listed your girlfriend's name, or said "and guest", she was no invited. (Yes, it is rude not to invite anyone without a guest, but that's another topic.)
You can't get an invitation to a wedding addressed to only you and assume it means you can bring other people.
Yeah, but going to post #1, don't you think that there was a "purpose" in addressing it just to me, if that's what happened...this was college, I don't remember. With about 250 people in attendance at a country club, many were with spouses and significant others. I doubt another platter of Chicken Cordon Bleu was going to break the bank. If there was indeed a "purpose," and I suspect there was, then I didn't feel so guilty about bringing a date. It's pretty standard to invite a single person with an "and guest."
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