Got A Wedding Invitation In The Mail Today Which I Don't Understand. (girls, polite)
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Look at a calendar. Please. It arrived December 5 and the wedding is Jan 9. 5 weeks exactly. Regardless - you are assuming this is an event wedding with a reception. The OP already indicated that it was simply dinner after the ceremony at the hotel dining room. If that is simply a public restaurant where they will be ordering off the menu, they do not need an advance head count weeks prior to the wedding. Hotel reservations also may not apply. It's a 45 minute drive to where the rest of the family lives. That's no different than a drive across town in medium sized city. They may well all be driving back home. The OP could presumably drive back and stay with family or at a hotel that didn't need a 2 month lead time for a room. The bride most likely knows who will come and who won't. OP already is put out because the bride didn't plan her wedding to the convenience of the OP. She doesn't need additional, unsubstantiated reasons to fuel her pouting. I also agree that if the OP was completely unaware this wedding was occuring, that would be odd. Families generally communicate these things.
People who send out wedding invitations to people they know can't/won't come - just so they can get a gift - make me sick to my stomach. What crass a$$-wipes.
People who send out wedding invitations to people they know can't/won't come - just so they can get a gift - make me sick to my stomach. What crass a$$-wipes.
From further clarifications it sounds like the invitation was likely sent as a courtesy invite to avoid hurting the feelings of a family member that will be visiting over Christmas holidays, thus the absence of an RSVP card. The ceremony sounds like it will be small and intimate, set in a lovely venue. IMO perfect for a second wedding.
People who send out wedding invitations to people they know can't/won't come - just so they can get a gift - make me sick to my stomach. What crass a$$-wipes.
I seriously don't understand this attitude. I would much rather be invited than not. It means you were thought of and they wish you could come. Don't want to send a gift, then don't. You don't know why they sent it. Don't ASSume.
I seriously don't understand this attitude. I would much rather be invited than not. It means you were thought of and they wish you could come. Don't want to send a gift, then don't. You don't know why they sent it. Don't ASSume.
Disagree with you completely. I have gotten wedding invitations from people halfway across the country from people I barely know. They know I'm not going to come to the wedding. So why send me an invitation?! It's because they want me to give them a gift - it's obvious! A$$%^%#$!
Disagree with you completely. I have gotten wedding invitations from people halfway across the country from people I barely know. They know I'm not going to come to the wedding. So why send me an invitation?! It's because they want me to give them a gift - it's obvious! A$$%^%#$!
I normally would agree with Kibbiekat on this....but you've pretty much convinced me you weren't invited for your charming personality.
Disagree with you completely. I have gotten wedding invitations from people halfway across the country from people I barely know. They know I'm not going to come to the wedding. So why send me an invitation?! It's because they want me to give them a gift - it's obvious! A$$%^%#$!
Maybe your friends are jerks. I've never ever received an invitation and thought I wasn't wanted there.
Look at a calendar. Please. It arrived December 5 and the wedding is Jan 9. 5 weeks exactly. Regardless - you are assuming this is an event wedding with a reception. The OP already indicated that it was simply dinner after the ceremony at the hotel dining room. If that is simply a public restaurant where they will be ordering off the menu, they do not need an advance head count weeks prior to the wedding. Hotel reservations also may not apply. It's a 45 minute drive to where the rest of the family lives. That's no different than a drive across town in medium sized city. They may well all be driving back home. The OP could presumably drive back and stay with family or at a hotel that didn't need a 2 month lead time for a room. The bride most likely knows who will come and who won't. OP already is put out because the bride didn't plan her wedding to the convenience of the OP. She doesn't need additional, unsubstantiated reasons to fuel her pouting. I also agree that if the OP was completely unaware this wedding was occuring, that would be odd. Families generally communicate these things.
The OP said it was 600 miles away, how is that 45 minutes? By plane, not driving.
And who walks into a restaurant(and especially in a hotel that is in a ski area in January) with say 25 people and expects to get seated. That is why a headcount is needed. You may not need a headcount weeks in advance I agree, but I would say at least a week since it's the height of their season.
Geez, even if you walk into an Applebees without calling ahead and say we have 20 people, expect to wait or not be accommodated on a weekend, never mind a busy ski lodge/hotel restaurant.
The OP said it was 600 miles away, how is that 45 minutes? By plane, not driving.
And who walks into a restaurant(and especially in a hotel that is in a ski area in January) with say 25 people and expects to get seated. That is why a headcount is needed. You may not need a headcount weeks in advance I agree, but I would say at least a week since it's the height of their season.
Geez, even if you walk into an Applebees without calling ahead and say we have 20 people, expect to wait or not be accommodated on a weekend, never mind a busy ski lodge/hotel restaurant.
The OP lives out of town. The rest of the family lives 45 minutes from the wedding venue. A dinner reservation can easily be made and adjusted as the date nears. No doubt the couple knows who can actually attend.
You continue to search for any reason to take umbrage - why is that? As another poster stated, it appears this is simply a small, casual second wedding for which the OP was extended the courtesy of an invitation based on her status in the family. What exactly is so awful about that?
The bride is damned if she does and damned if she doesn't. People here complained about the unseemliness of celebrating a second wedding, when the invitation was mailed (even though they had no intention of attending), the date, the location and even just the idea of being invited. If there was no invitation extended, people would be upset at the oversight. Good grief.
The invite should have said, "In lieu of your attendance please $end money"
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