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Miscarriages and infertility have never been good reasons for finding a home for a child. This myth started with adoption agencies by the way. Quite simply, if parenting is something someone wants to do, they go to an orphanage or Foster care. They may adopt or not, but that's not as important as helping a child in challenging circumstances. Potential recipients for a heart transplant don't repeatedly ask/pray for someone to die, and potential adopters for infants only shouldn't ask/pray for someone's parents to die or not have enough help to remain parents, either.
OMG, even the title makes me sad and sick at the same time. Though we all know the adoption system has changed over the years, to advertise on Craigslist or anyplace similar is just scary. What are we dealing with? It is no more adoption for the sake of baby and mommy or we will buy your baby?
OMG, even the title makes me sad and sick at the same time. Though we all know the adoption system has changed over the years, to advertise on Craigslist or anyplace similar is just scary. What are we dealing with? It is no more adoption for the sake of baby and mommy or we will buy your baby?
I have read the ads, and yes, it is scary.
Also scares me when I hear that a couple is trying to adopt and has been rejected by all the agencies, so what should they do.
Red flags when it comes to the life of a child are very scary.
Exchanging pets on Craigslist is considered by some to be unethical, but somehow exchanging children is OK because there is a shortage and the wants of the privileged and entitled must be met? The things I read on the adoption forum never cease to amaze me.
How do you automatically categorize people who desire to be parents as "privileged and entitled"?
Also scares me when I hear that a couple is trying to adopt and has been rejected by all the agencies, so what should they do.
Red flags when it comes to the life of a child are very scary.
If a parent has a felony, they might never be allowed to adopt.
Example: I knew a couple, who happened to be a minority (always needed as foster parents) who wished to become foster parents. They were both in their 30s and were willing to foster to adopt even an older child. They went to their local social services agency and didn't make it past the first form. The father had a non-violent felony conviction (where he served under 3 months) when he was 18 years old. Automatic rejection.
They didn't have the funds to look into other forms of adoption. But just because someone is "REJECTED" does not mean they are unfit to parent.
When we adopted, some agencies would reject us because my husband was married and divorced before he and I married. One refused to consider us because we had 2 children. At the time I wasn't on an SSRI (I am now) but some refused based on that. International adoption is even more picky.
I don't like how the US handles adoptions, at all. But I don't think being rejected or choosing to go without an agency is that big of red flag.
Maddening.
Saddening.
Makes me ill.
Unethical.
Slippery slope.
Children exchange.
Everyone wants on the bandwagon that using social media or alternative methods is bad here in the US but we turn a blind eye to the reality that international adoption is a legalized black market. Your "fees" include bribes and payments to expedite paperwork that those without money cannot make happen. Somehow, when run through a "legitimate" agency and involving a birth parent from another country that in all likelihood cannot ever track down their child, buying that child from a foreign land is acceptable.
Red flags? There are red flags all over the place with many prospective parents. Children are born into imperfect families every day, in every community. People with mental illness, chemical dependencies, and poverty are having children right now. There will never be a system that can eliminate the imperfections and make every scenario perfect - in natural birth or adoption.
nobody is disputing what is best for the child. In the olden days there were plenty of available babies for adoption and if a couple wanted one they simply applied with the state or adoption agency. Today they are scarce and people have to use what is available to them to get the word out. Social media in the form of craigslist, FB, and all others should be used legally and fairly to make a good match. We all have to realize we cannot go back to the olden days.
With adoption agencies scrapbooks and photos and letters of recommendations are used to sway birth mothers to pick couples for their child. It becomes a beauty and popularity contest. Don't you think the child will be shown "This is the scrapbook we made to convince your birthmother we were the best out of all the others to adopt you" How is that any different than an initial inquiry on craigslist? I don't think anybody is espousing making a listing on CL , set a meeting time and place and handing over the kid. This story is not that at all. I said as long as legal proceedings are following I think it is just another tool.
Yes we all know things have changed. It started in the late 60s with the pill being a good birth control product and single moms not being looked down on so much. Adoption became much more difficult. But still advertising on Craigs List is not the answer. Adoption isn't like buying a used car and the number of things that could go wrong can not be counted on all 10 fingers.
It was even suggested to me I stand in front of an abortion clinic with a sign saying I wanted to adopt. Can you imagine.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gcm7189
Yet, people will stand outside of an abortion clinic with a sign saying they want to adopt a baby.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Illinoisadoptee
Would your kid want to know you held a sign in front of an abortion clinic?
I can think of few ways to better put a pro-life belief into practice than to do just that: to stand in front of an abortion clinic and offer to directly save the life of a little baby who is about to be butchered, and raise that baby as your own child.
Craigslist ads? Creepy to the max. Saving an innocent baby who is about to be killed, and making him your own? To me, that's a beautiful testimony of living out your convictions. This is not how I got my kids, but if it had been, I would be proud to tell them (once they were old enough to understand what abortion means).
Author refers to prospective parents but erroneously identifies an expectant mother as birth mother before relinquishment, and author does not understand the purpose of adoption because first paragraph is about the couple's infertility. And as the story unfolds, it is the Citrons blinded by covetousness and then lying about being desperate, when actually it was Nelson's family in crisis and therefore desperate.
Because there is less product for adoption clearinghouses, we will see more articles like this one, which is propaganda.
Advertising for a baby on Craigslist spells "desperation" and leaves that couple vulnerable to whatever is out there. I do not believe that pregnant women looking to do the best for their baby search the Craigslist ads.
I don't think some that are turned down by agencies tell their friends and families the reason(s) that they were rejected. They do a background check and require references. They dig deep as they should. There can be red flags during the interviews or classes that are required. Sometimes with older children, it really takes a lot to get a match as love does not solve ALL issues.
Seems "trashy" to me to advertise on Craigslist. I wouldn't even look there for a pet.
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Why?
