Why Does Dating Suck In Metro Atlanta areas? (Columbus, Perry: moving, cars)
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Really, that list is too much to consider? Let's examine it, just to be sure.
Non-attached: Okay, that seems like a reasonable request. Most folk don't want to be with someone who is with someone else.
Heterosexual: Again, quite reasonable. I think it's beyond the pale to expect a woman to want a man who is into other men.
Tall, physically fit: Can't fault her this one. To my mind a woman wanting a man who is tall and physically fit is the equivalent to a man wanting a physically attractive woman. This is especially true if she herself is tall and physically fit.
Kind: I'm actually surprised this one made the list. Surely it's a given. Who wants a jerk?
Witty: A good sense of humor is crucial to me as well.
Educated: Assuming that she too is educated I don't think this is too much to ask.
Age-appropriate: I gather that she wants a man within a reasonable range of her own age. Nothing outrageous there. Personally I never wanted an old dude and had no interest in being a grown man's mama. I so totally get this.
Adventurous: If she's an adventurous woman it makes sense that she'd be looking for the same in a spouse. After all, I can't imagine anything more awful than being stuck at home with someone when I'd rather be out rock climbing.
So she had eight or nine things she was looking for, of which three (sexuality, unattached and kindness are givens). Of the remaining six, I don't see anything outrageous there. I also required that any guy I dated be non-racist/sexist/homophobic. I think anyone has the right to establish whatever criteria they like for someone that's going to be with them for life. I think it's crucial to examine yourself and potential mates very diligently. There are things that are on my list that wouldn't be on someone else's and vice-versa. But I certainly wouldn't slam anyone for what they have on their list. If someone says that a woman must have big breasts and be able to cook I think they should definitely go for what they like. Life's too short to be stuck with someone incompatible.
Hmmm, it seems to be a female thing to create a defined list of things they want in a mate. I'm not saying it's necessarily bad but I don't know any of my male friends who approach dating in a checklist sort of way. If we meet someone who is reasonably attractive, halfway nice, and not bat-guano crazy then we can pretty much consider them dating material. I wouldn't necessarily care if she ran her own multi-million dollar company or scrubbed toilets for a living.
But just for S's and G's I'm gonna comment on that list. (My comments)
Non-attached: Okay, that seems like a reasonable request. Most folk don't want to be with someone who is with someone else.(Unless they have a Siamese twin fetish.)
Heterosexual: Again, quite reasonable. I think it's beyond the pale to expect a woman to want a man who is into other men.(Yet I see a ridiculous amount of bisexual female profiles on a certain dating site. Do women think average guys view actively bisexual women as long-term relationship material? Don't give me no jive that women are naturally more prone to bisexuality than men because many of us have seen the movie 300 or have at least a passing knowledge of Greek history.)
Tall, physically fit: Can't fault her this one. To my mind a woman wanting a man who is tall and physically fit is the equivalent to a man wanting a physically attractive woman. This is especially true if she herself is tall and physically fit. (How tall is tall? 6'? 6'2"? 6'4"? Where does she draw the line? How physically fit is physically fit? Are we talking six-pack here? Muscle-bound? Lean? Not morbidly obese? Is she expecting a guy straight out of Fitness magazine? Is she willing to allow him more time at the gym than with her because that is really what it takes for an average guy to achieve that sort of body? Also, a physically attractive women doesn't necessarily have to be physically fit.)
Kind: I'm actually surprised this one made the list. Surely it's a given. Who wants a jerk?(And we expect the kindness to be returned and our gestures appreciated.)
Witty: A good sense of humor is crucial to me as well.(As long as we aren't doing ALL the entertaining. Nothing is more irritating than having to carry BOTH sides of the conversation. This is something a lot of women should look into. A funny and witty woman is rare indeed.)
Educated: Assuming that she too is educated I don't think this is too much to ask.(Just don't be an education snob. If you pull that crap then expect to be dropped. If someone obsesses so much on their education(either past, present, or future), it's a sign that they haven't really lived out in the real world. Rejecting a guy because he only has a Bachelor's degree when you have a Master's is also pretty dumb but I'm sure it happens. Like it actually is a measure of someone's intelligence or ambition...)
Age-appropriate: I gather that she wants a man within a reasonable range of her own age. Nothing outrageous there. Personally I never wanted an old dude and had no interest in being a grown man's mama. I so totally get this.(Can't say I disagree with this and I must admit that I seldom consider women more than a couple years older than me. It's weird, I just don't seem to notice them.)
Adventurous: If she's an adventurous woman it makes sense that she'd be looking for the same in a spouse. After all, I can't imagine anything more awful than being stuck at home with someone when I'd rather be out rock climbing.(For some women adventurous means flying in your private jet around the world to exotic locations like Monaco or Fiji. i.e. rich)
So she had eight or nine things she was looking for, of which three (sexuality, unattached and kindness are givens). Of the remaining six, I don't see anything outrageous there. I also required that any guy I dated be non-racist/sexist/homophobic. I think anyone has the right to establish whatever criteria they like for someone that's going to be with them for life. I think it's crucial to examine yourself and potential mates very diligently. There are things that are on my list that wouldn't be on someone else's and vice-versa. But I certainly wouldn't slam anyone for what they have on their list. If someone says that a woman must have big breasts and be able to cook I think they should definitely go for what they like. Life's too short to be stuck with someone incompatible.(I just have never thought about it enough to develop a list of requirements. Like I said, if she is cute, friendly, and sane she's halfway to matrimony with me.
Yall see that lkobe wife is about to take him to the cleaners? This right here is one of the reasons men aren't rushing to get married
Never really liked Kobe, but I always knew that Vanessa chick was gonna rape him. He will probably get raped worse than Shaq...as a dude I feel bad for him. He was only being AMBITIOUS & ADVENDTUROUS. Never meet a man who was Ambitious & Adventurous who didnt want to sleep with all the flavors available. Kobe made a mistake by getting married. Just Like Shaq, Tiger, Jordan, Tyson, etc etc....Ambitious/Adventurous men should never get married. They dont have to...The fishes are jumping in their boat while the other fishermen are having their bait ripped. Live & learn Kobe....maybe he should go back to # 8.
Never really liked Kobe, but I always knew that Vanessa chick was gonna rape him. He will probably get raped worse than Shaq...as a dude I feel bad for him. He was only being AMBITIOUS & ADVENDTUROUS. Never meet a man who was Ambitious & Adventurous who didnt want to sleep with all the flavors available. Kobe made a mistake by getting married. Just Like Shaq, Tiger, Jordan, Tyson, etc etc....Ambitious/Adventurous men should never get married. They dont have to...The fishes are jumping in their boat while the other fishermen are having their bait ripped. Live & learn Kobe....maybe he should go back to # 8.
Should the payout be millions of $$$$ for cheating? If she didn't cook/etc does she deserve it? I know she wasn't the perfect wife
Uh, could we possibly reserve the use of this word for actual rape? There's something seriously wrong when we equate a couple of millionaires divorce settlement to a brutal sexual assault. I find it unbelievable that anyone would empathize with a man who exposed his wife and unborn child to the possibility of STDs or worse by having unprotected anal sex with some stranger he picked up in a hotel.
As for the adventurous and ambitious men you know, all I can say is that's really sad. Thanks be to God that they don't get married.
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Originally Posted by FlyiMetro
Never really liked Kobe, but I always knew that Vanessa chick was gonna rape him. He will probably get raped worse than Shaq...as a dude I feel bad for him. He was only being AMBITIOUS & ADVENDTUROUS. Never meet a man who was Ambitious & Adventurous who didnt want to sleep with all the flavors available. Kobe made a mistake by getting married. Just Like Shaq, Tiger, Jordan, Tyson, etc etc....Ambitious/Adventurous men should never get married. They dont have to...The fishes are jumping in their boat while the other fishermen are having their bait ripped. Live & learn Kobe....maybe he should go back to # 8.
Should the payout be millions of $$$$ for cheating? If she didn't cook/etc does she deserve it? I know she wasn't the perfect wife
Depends on who you ask. This is where Wit, Street Smarts & Discernment would come into play. 3 things Kobe didnt have before stepping in this trap. He has enough to pay out I guess, but In my opinion dude didnt do anything wrong.
Uh, could we possibly reserve the use of this word for actual rape? There's something seriously wrong when we equate a couple of millionaires divorce settlement to a brutal sexual assault. I find it unbelievable that anyone would empathize with a man who exposed his wife and unborn child to the possibility of STDs or worse by having unprotected anal sex with some stranger he picked up in a hotel.
As for the adventurous and ambitious men you know, all I can say is that's really sad. Thanks be to God that they don't get married.
Its a shame that you think your female/religious point of view is the right point of view. If a woman wants an ambitious man, please know that sexual ambition comes with it. I guess your type will call Kobe a FAKE man? lol...but when a man does all the things his woman wants him to do he is then a REAL man right? Kobe has money, fame, influence etc, he has the power to slept with as many attractive women that throw themselves at him. He shouldnt have his accounts raped because of that. Shame on Vanessa for not allowing Kobe to enjoy the fruits of HIS Labor. Kobe & other ambitious types should not get married, but they keep getting pressured to do so. Society has misantry on the brain.
Actually I wouldn't call any of the guys you've listed a adventurous at all. Other than playing sports I haven't seen them do anything adventurous. And I've certainly watched all of them play enough ball that I'd categorize them as selfish brats, especially Kobe and Shaq. Kobe has the emotional maturity of a seven-year-old and Shaq isn't much better. Tiger is a psychological mess and good GOD I just realized you included Mike Tyson in your list. Like I said, something definitely got lost in the translation when you equate the words ambitious and adventurous with people like them. In my book none of those guys would ever have made the cut. Next.
Heterosexual:(Yet I see a ridiculous amount of bisexual female profiles on a certain dating site. Do women think average guys view actively bisexual women as long-term relationship material? Don't give me no jive that women are naturally more prone to bisexuality than men because many of us have seen the movie 300 or have at least a passing knowledge of Greek history.)
Can't help you there. I don't know any bisexual women, though I do know at one point it seemed quite fashionable to be bisexual. And some men seem to think it's hot, but I dunno.
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Tall, physically fit:(How tall is tall? 6'? 6'2"? 6'4"? Where does she draw the line? How physically fit is physically fit? Are we talking six-pack here? Muscle-bound? Lean? Not morbidly obese? Is she expecting a guy straight out of Fitness magazine? Is she willing to allow him more time at the gym than with her because that is really what it takes for an average guy to achieve that sort of body? Also, a physically attractive women doesn't necessarily have to be physically fit.)
I guess it depends on the woman. I'm 5'9" so at least 6' seems appropriate, though I've dated men my height. I actually rarely meet men who are shorter than myself. I think one poster mentioned that she's 6' tall, so I'm guessing she's talking about a guy who is 6'2" or so. I don't know any women who are into fitness mag dudes. I've always assumed that was mainly for the non-hetero population, but I could be wrong. Plus a lot of those guys use steroids and "roid rage" is nothing nice. I personally prefer tall lean men, like the President for example. My husband has a similar physique and he doesn't live in the gym. He runs and plays soccer regularly. I think the President works out some, but mainly plays basketball.
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Kind:(And we expect the kindness to be returned and our gestures appreciated.)
Most assuredly, like I said I would think reciprocation would be a given. I think it's very sad that such a thing would even be mentioned.
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Witty:(As long as we aren't doing ALL the entertaining. Nothing is more irritating than having to carry BOTH sides of the conversation. This is something a lot of women should look into. A funny and witty woman is rare indeed.)
Can't comment. As far as I know I have a good sense of humor.
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Educated:(Just don't be an education snob. If you pull that crap then expect to be dropped. If someone obsesses so much on their education(either past, present, or future), it's a sign that they haven't really lived out in the real world. Rejecting a guy because he only has a Bachelor's degree when you have a Master's is also pretty dumb but I'm sure it happens. Like it actually is a measure of someone's intelligence or ambition...)
Fair enough.
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Adventurous:(For some women adventurous means flying in your private jet around the world to exotic locations like Monaco or Fiji. i.e. rich)
I don't think of that as adventurous, maybe we need some type of translator. To me, adventurous is taking off to Europe without a dime to your name and making your way around. Taking off to Europe when you have money, what's the adventure there? When I was younger I would think nothing of taking off by myself on a cross-country trip. I wasn't broke, but certainly didn't have a lot of money. Money doesn't adventure make. Adventure is based on attitude and a spirit of "Hmmm, I wonder what will happen next?" Indeed, IMO money can sometimes get in the way of that.
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(I just have never thought about it enough to develop a list of requirements. Like I said, if she is cute, friendly, and sane she's halfway to matrimony with me.
But that's a list. I get your point, and not all women have lists, but I think a lot of women develop one because so many people are constantly asking them "What are you looking for? Why aren't you married yet?" (All this is done in an accusatory tone. Hmph she must be looking for a dude with Denzel's face and LL's body.) So you develop a list so you can show people that you aren't searching for a bunch of superficial nonsense.
Gotta love these conversations on dating and marriage in America. It's almost like a lot of these women expect an average man to send in a resume and provide a list of 3 professional references before the first date even starts. And the bar gets even higher when marriage comes into play. No wonder there aren't too many male applicants willing to step up to the plate these days.
The requirements are reasonable to a certain extent I guess, but Tall? Adventurous? Really?
So not only must a man be at least 6ft in height but he must also be willing to shell out $$$$ for weekend jaunts to the Bahamas? Who the heck can fulfill those requirements but men like Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O'Neal!?!?
I mean, I certainly can't fulfill them. I'm barely over 5ft 8inches so being "tall" by western standards is out of the picture. Adventurous for me is a drive down to Miami once a month, and even then I'm bumming it in some low-rent dive type of Motel.
You gals may have your requirements and that's good for you. Everyone should have standards. But geez louise some of y'all should look at how you sound when you make those requirements, even if they are reasonable to a certain extent.
Dating is a free-marketplace, and like any market you want to make a good sales pitch to your potential consumer on why they should buy your "product"; and right now a lot of women in Atlanta are failing to make a decent pitch.
Your product is sitting on the shelves too long and getting older by the day, and y'all women need to realize that at some point a mark-down is in order. But if you women are so hell-bent on maintaining those standards in light of the reality that the dating marketplace has now gone global, so be it.
That's why I so love the fact that I was born a man.
Men are simple: We want food. We want beer. We want easy sex. We want to come home from a hard day's work to a peaceful house with no nagging. No need for an average woman to fill out a resume in my book. A man's product is simple; it's almost like shopping at Wal-Mart when you think about it!
Too bad far too many of you feminist/puritanical type of women like to over-complicate things. Dating in this country would be so easy and sooo much of a non-hassle if y'all didn't continually insist on jamming up the situation with unreasonably high application fees and overly bureaucratic rules to navigate through.
Just...sayin'.
Last edited by AcidSnake; 12-18-2011 at 09:08 AM..
So not only must a man be at least 6ft in height but he must also be willing to shell out $$$$ for weekend jaunts to the Bahamas?
Did you ask the poster to define adventurous? An adventure to my husband and I was a road trip to NH and we had a fab time. Some women like backpacking or hanggliding. You have to know what she means.
And again tall is relative. I have a girlfriend who is 5'2". To her, a man who is 5'8" is practically a giant. She thinks my husband's 6'2" is freakish. (Oddly enough, tall guys adore her and they freak her out.)
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I get your point, and not all women have lists, but I think a lot of women develop one because so many people are constantly asking them "What are you looking for? Why aren't you married yet?" (All this is done in an accusatory tone. Hmph she must be looking for a dude with Denzel's face and LL's body.) So you develop a list so you can show people that you aren't searching for a bunch of superficial nonsense.
Adventurous for me is a drive down to Miami once a month, and even then I'm bumming it in some low-rent dive type of Motel.
