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p.s. The reason this is of interest to me is because being a combination of English, German, Irish, and Swiss, I pretty much have NO pigmentation in my skin. I'm about as white as it gets and I'm not capable of tanning, just burning, so I am very good friends with high-numbered sunblock. I'm a very happy person, I like making friends, and I'm not one to throw attitude so I dont' think that will be an issue, I just keep hearing stories about things and I get nervous. Nothing more!
We really DO like to help people out, at least most of us do, but of the over 6,000 threads in the archives here, it seems at least half of them are people asking the same handful of general questions, over and over and over. What about jobs? What about the cost of living? What about schools? What about crime? etc. And then there are a few which always seem to degenerate into a swamp of craziness, like the one you asked.
In fact, I think the best way to use the Forum is to search through back threads to get your general questions handled in depth, then ask more specific questions pertaining to your individual needs and interests. And then be willing to take it all with a grain of salt, because people are different and the viewpoints expressed will be all over the map.
If you like, I can DM you a list of people you can safely ignore.
p.s. The reason this is of interest to me is because being a combination of English, German, Irish, and Swiss, I pretty much have NO pigmentation in my skin. I'm about as white as it gets and I'm not capable of tanning, just burning, so I am very good friends with high-numbered sunblock. I'm a very happy person, I like making friends, and I'm not one to throw attitude so I dont' think that will be an issue, I just keep hearing stories about things and I get nervous. Nothing more!
heck, if i take a nap on the beach, It would not surprise me if the coroner was called out to declare me.
I also have the problem that although a born and sorta raised american, I have grown up where englsih is the 2nd or 3rd language and at times my schooling consisted of a lot of english speaking classes (bad english at times) along witht he grandparents limited command of englsih so I also sport a distinct eastern european acccent.
Accent + pale skin + = one #1 haole. But hawaii is by far the most comfortable place I go where none of this seems to matter, so brush that aside and concentrate on realities and not other people's reported suspicions
The reason this is of interest to me is because being a combination of English, German, Irish, and Swiss, I pretty much have NO pigmentation in my skin. I'm about as white as it gets and I'm not capable of tanning, just burning, so I am very good friends with high-numbered sunblock.
Yup, I'm pretty much the same, but with Scotch in place of Swiss, and pale blonde hair, when I had more hair. My skin is so pale I sunburn under movie and TV lights. So I gotcha.
First, haole actually means foreigner in Hawaiian, not "white," so don't fall into that semantic trap.
Second, in Hawai'i, as the census tells us, "white" is a minority, at less than 25%. Asians are the majority, at nearly 39%. "Mixed" is about equal to white, and "Native" are about 10%. So accurately, 90% of the residents are haole.
Also keep in mind that long sleeves and large brims are very practical for palefaces in Hawai'i, and that any company that claims over 100 SPF factor for their sunblock is lying. The waterproof kind lasts a lot longer in all this humidity.
And a smile and a friendly attitude will take you a long way. Relax, be nice, you'll be fine. But cover up.
I'm so white, I burn under a full moon. Seriously, you'll be fine. In over a decade of going to Hawaii with my Hawaiian wife, I've only twice been the victim of rudeness that I knew for a fact was due to my being a Mainland haole. If you're sensitive to the culture, show interest in it, are respectful, and are open and friendly with people, you'll find Hawaiians overall to be some of the friendliest, most generous people anywhere. If you project an attitude of entitlement because you're a Mainlander, or wonder why things aren't done as they are on the Mainland, you'll get cold shoulder and stink eye. The people I feel sorry for are well-meaning Mainlanders who come from blunt or emotionally non-expressive cultures and don't understand all the friendliness and hugging, and who assume that Hawaiians must have ulterior motives, so they pull back, which causes Hawaiians to pull back, thus beginning a downward spiral of misunderstanding.
I don't live in HI to know, but I always assumed 'Mixed' meant more Hawaiian...i.e. probably people who might feel more identity or have partial blood with being 'Hawaiian'.
And you have to realize that when the store clerk is ignoring you because he's talking story or waiting on a friend, it's because that's what business is like here. It has nothing to do with the color of your skin. Unfortunately, people who don't understand the culture here would probably think it has to do with the color of their skin, and that's how those nasty stories get started.
I never, ever worry about how I'm being treated, because I go to people with a smile and open arms and they respond in kind.
And you have to realize that when the store clerk is ignoring you because he's talking story or waiting on a friend, it's because that's what business is like here. It has nothing to do with the color of your skin. Unfortunately, people who don't understand the culture here would probably think it has to do with the color of their skin, and that's how those nasty stories get started.
I never, ever worry about how I'm being treated, because I go to people with a smile and open arms and they respond in kind.
I observe the same thing over here in Japan/Korea.
I seldom if ever personally see or experience racist things here as a white guy in an Asian country (unlike some other white people I know who've lived in Japan/Korea)...but I also remember that just general white american people when I'm back in the U.S., occassionally rub me the wrong way, or I might even rub them the wrong way, from time to time.
Sometimes people forget that people are just people. People get away from home, and than assume that 'everyone back home' always behaved exactly in the way they wanted them to, at all times.
And, yeah, cultural differences throw people off. They read things wrongly because of it.
I observe the same thing over here in Japan/Korea.
Sometimes people forget that people are just people. People get away from home, and than assume that 'everyone back home' always behaved exactly in the way they wanted them to, at all times.
And, yeah, cultural differences throw people off. They read things wrongly because of it.
So very true.
People come here, hearing about the "haole" thing, and misread common human behavior as personal affront.
Are there people who will instantly misjudge you because of your complexion? Yes.
But, with rare exception, you can prove that your are not worthy of their knee-jerk evaluation within mere minutes, if not seconds. Courtesy, deference, just being nice and not taking the reins. A smile, giving up your place in line, offering to let someone go ahead of you, holding a door.
It may not be offered to you, at first, but take the higher road. It's well worth it.
Will you be loved by all? Nope. But then again---were you loved by all where you came from?
I don't live in HI to know, but I always assumed 'Mixed' meant more Hawaiian...i.e. probably people who might feel more identity or have partial blood with being 'Hawaiian'.
Across the country the self-identification with "two races or more" was the fastest growing demographic from the previous census, and in Hawai'i this "mixed" group sustained a 34% increase. The analysts say two factors are at play here. First, there has been an increase in the number of children from mixed marriages. Second, the generation coming of age now seems much more relaxed about identifying with "mixed." In other words, racial identity is apparently less of a concern to the next generation than it has been to ours.
Of the 1,211,537 residents of Hawai'i reported in the 2010 census, to look at the four largest racial groupings:
80, 137 - 6.6% call themselves Hawaiian (plus another 3% other Pacific Islander) but
282,667 - 23.3% say they have at least some Hawaiian or Pacific Islander blood
294, 102 - 24.3% say they're White but
476,162 - 39.3% say they have White blood
503,868 - 41.6% say they're Asian but
703,232 - 58.0% say they have Asian blood
22,003 - 1.8% say they're Black but
33,343 - 2.8% say they have Black blood
A total of 259,343 Hawaiian residents, 21.1% of the total, self-identify as Mixed (2 or more races)
According to the US Census, Hawai'i is the most diverse state in the country. So it makes sense that "Mixed" is a large and growing demographic.
Last edited by OpenD; 04-25-2012 at 08:53 AM..
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But hawaii is by far the most comfortable place I go where none of this seems to matter, so brush that aside and concentrate on realities and not other people's reported suspicions 
Seriously, you'll be fine. In over a decade of going to Hawaii with my Hawaiian wife, I've only twice been the victim of rudeness that I knew for a fact was due to my being a Mainland haole. If you're sensitive to the culture, show interest in it, are respectful, and are open and friendly with people, you'll find Hawaiians overall to be some of the friendliest, most generous people anywhere. If you project an attitude of entitlement because you're a Mainlander, or wonder why things aren't done as they are on the Mainland, you'll get cold shoulder and stink eye. The people I feel sorry for are well-meaning Mainlanders who come from blunt or emotionally non-expressive cultures and don't understand all the friendliness and hugging, and who assume that Hawaiians must have ulterior motives, so they pull back, which causes Hawaiians to pull back, thus beginning a downward spiral of misunderstanding.
