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My dad was diagnosed with Acute Leukemia in November 2013
Mom called me and I drove them to U of M Motts
After months of Chemo/radiation/treatment he was cured...but was told it had high percentage chance of coming back
He did Stem Cell Transplant...donor...despite all the possible side affects
He got Graft Host Disease...back in the hospital for a couple weeks in November 2014
Thought he was doing well
11-19-2014 got the call at work...family needs to get here now
Sister was called (another country) HIS sister (who had a mastectomy in 90's) and bro in law in another state...get on plane get here...he died at 1:30...had to call my sister and tell her dad died...at 70
He barely got a year...over half of it was suffering and treatment
His best friend just recently died of brain/liver cancer
good friend of ours brain/liver/spine...leaving behind young kids
friend I work with...younger than me...diagnosed with prostate cancer recently
on and on and on
We can all relate to these stories especially those of us over 70. For us, personally hubby who had treatments back in 2012 is now considered cured. At 81 we are so thankful. Now as for friends, we just learned a very good friend of ours has been diagnosed with both liver and pancreatic cancer. I don't know his prognosis yet but am guessing it isn't good news at all.
As for your friend and prostate cancer there are stats on this, but if I remember right the chances are pretty good if you live long enough you will develop it. That was one of the kinds of cancer hubby had, but not the only. It is usually quite curable and grows very slowly so I have been told. We have a friend here who was diagnosed a couple of years ago and his urologist is playing the waiting game. So far it hasn't even grown .
I lost my lovely 34 yo DIL last year. She left my son and 4yo grandson. They are doing okay but she is missed so much by us all. I still cry privately most days thinking of her being cheated out of her life and my little grandson growing up without his wonderful mother.
My dad died of pancreatic cancer six months after diagnosis. He knew he wasn't feeling right, but it took them a while to find the cause, and when they did it was too late to do much. He was 52.
My father-in-law has stage four kidney cancer. He was diagnosed in January almost six years ago. He had his kidney removed, his hip, part of his leg, and most recently his knee. The stuff just keeps spreading. He's been down all year because of his knee replacement getting infected over and over again. He's off his cancer meds so that the knee can hopefully heal, but I can't help but worry about the cancer spreading even more.
My grandmother on my dad's side also died of breast cancer at age 50.
Sometimes it feels like cancer is everywhere and we can't win. It takes too many people's lives every single year.
My wife just died of lung cancer that had metastasized in her bones. We missed our 50th anniversary by 25 days when she died last month. I miss her; but I never wanted her to live in pain. Her suffering is now over. Both our son and I were with her as she took her dying breaths. She looked peaceful after she died.
One subject that I would like to talk about is euthanasia. I know that all we like to think about is our loved ones living forever. But none of us want our loved ones to live forever in pain. I know my wife did not want to live in pain. This was the hardest part of her passing for me. If she asked me once; she asked me 1,000 times to shoot her and end her misery. I wish that others could picture what they would do in similar circumstances? My wife was aware that we could not stand to see wildlife suffer and I would render a quick and painless death to the animal.
But I could never help my wife with her pain other than making sure she had the pain killers that she required. More than anything she wanted our son to have an inheritance and, if I had assisted her in her death, I could forfeit his inheritance to the state.
With all cancer treatments there is a time of hope. Some, like my wife's cancer, are still going to be incurable. But when attempts to save our loved ones fail; should we not have that option to die with dignity? Right now six states and the District of Columbia permit euthanasia. For all the other states they treat their dogs and prisoners to a better death than their loved ones.
Most humans do not want to live in pain and it is especially hard when you loose your mobility. What is wrong with allowing individuals to chose their method of death and time of death when they are of sound mind and can do the proper documentation?
None of us will live forever. Even though new drugs bring new hope for cancer patients; some will not be saved from the pain and suffering. I really hope that nobody else is ever in my shoes with a loved one wishing to die and you know that you cannot help. Please give this careful consideration and push for legislative action. Sometimes being human is not humane!
I've had two friends die of pancreatic cancer. Watching them deteriorate was very sad and difficult to understand how it could happen so quickly. One friend, Rick, who was the drummer in our band went from a mountain of a man at 280 lbs, to this shell at about 180. My brother died from esophageal cancer, which was bad, but not as bad as pancreatic cancer. This disease is truly horrible.
I had breast cancer 10 years ago. As soon as I finished treatment, I put it out of my mind, until my sisters breast cancer metastasized to her bones. It was 10 years after the original cancer. She lost the battle after a hard fight.
Now, I no longer am able to put cancer out of my mind. Every day I think, is this the day that mine will come back? We all need to live each day to the fullest.
I remain adamant that I do not participate in any of the pink brigade stuff. I want no part of it. In a way, it seems exploitive to me. Pink this, and pink that is just a way to sell more stuff.
My wife just died of lung cancer that had metastasized in her bones. We missed our 50th anniversary by 25 days when she died last month. I miss her; but I never wanted her to live in pain. Her suffering is now over. Both our son and I were with her as she took her dying breaths. She looked peaceful after she died.
One subject that I would like to talk about is euthanasia. I know that all we like to think about is our loved ones living forever. But none of us want our loved ones to live forever in pain. I know my wife did not want to live in pain. This was the hardest part of her passing for me. If she asked me once; she asked me 1,000 times to shoot her and end her misery. I wish that others could picture what they would do in similar circumstances? My wife was aware that we could not stand to see wildlife suffer and I would render a quick and painless death to the animal.
But I could never help my wife with her pain other than making sure she had the pain killers that she required. More than anything she wanted our son to have an inheritance and, if I had assisted her in her death, I could forfeit his inheritance to the state.
With all cancer treatments there is a time of hope. Some, like my wife's cancer, are still going to be incurable. But when attempts to save our loved ones fail; should we not have that option to die with dignity? Right now six states and the District of Columbia permit euthanasia. For all the other states they treat their dogs and prisoners to a better death than their loved ones.
Most humans do not want to live in pain and it is especially hard when you loose your mobility. What is wrong with allowing individuals to chose their method of death and time of death when they are of sound mind and can do the proper documentation?
None of us will live forever. Even though new drugs bring new hope for cancer patients; some will not be saved from the pain and suffering. I really hope that nobody else is ever in my shoes with a loved one wishing to die and you know that you cannot help. Please give this careful consideration and push for legislative action. Sometimes being human is not humane!
Fisheye, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. The loved one is out of pain finally, but we have to endure and live with the pain of loss.
I have prepared an Advance Directive, which spells out my wishes for end of life care. I made it as specific as I could and my PCP signed it. I would hope that everyone would have one.
Fisheye, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. The loved one is out of pain finally, but we have to endure and live with the pain of loss.
I have prepared an Advance Directive, which spells out my wishes for end of life care. I made it as specific as I could and my PCP signed it. I would hope that everyone would have one.
Thank you! It is good advice to have an Advance Directive; which my wife had. She wanted to die at home and did not want to suffer or receive life sustaining treatments.
But Advance Directives are not euthanasia. In many cases religion bans euthanasia; nobody is going to force somebody that has religious beliefs into being euthanized. It isn't an easy process even in the states that do have legal euthanasia; there is a lot of documentation and most require permanent residency for a year before the applications will even be considered.
I just feel that euthanasia is one human right that most are currently denied. That is especially true for our elderly that never planned to live a life where they are in pain, confused and have no quality of life. Cancer takes that to another level; it is not something you can take two Tylenols and you are great for the rest of the day. In many cases the 'pain relief' does not relieve all the pain. Being confined to a hospital bed does not help; you have to rely on others that might or might not come when needed. It was one of the reasons that I slept in a chair by her side in the hospital until she could come home.
PS At least your State does allow euthanasia; ours does not.
Fisheye, I'm so sorry about the loss of your wife. She was very fortunate you were so devoted in keeping her as pain free as possible, and I'm sure that you saved her from much suffering.
I definitely agree with you about euthanasia. My sister died from breast cancer. She saved up a good store of her pain meds and then chose her own time to pass when the pain became too much.
I hope you are taking care of yourself. It takes time to recover from the stress and fatigue as well as the loss of a loved one.
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