[Lalalally]

He's classic textbook and shouldn't be encouraged. Feeding him only exacerbates the situation and his sickness. Ignoring him, while it may seem harsh, is actually the best thing for him. He's in fact so textbook, that the following cut and paste requires no editing, at all... People with victim mentality disorder are generally:

"negative, with a general tendency to focus on bad rather than good aspects of a situation. A glass that is half full is considered half empty. A person with a high standard of living complains about not having enough money. A healthy person complains of minor health problems that others would ignore (cf. hypochondriasis).
self-absorbed: unable or reluctant to consider a situation from the point of view of other people or to "walk a mile in their shoes".
defensive: In conversation, reading a non-existent negative intention into a neutral question and reacting with a corresponding accusation, hindering the collective solution of problems and instead creating unnecessary conflict.
categorizing: tending to divide people into "goodies" and "baddies" with no gray zone between them.
unadventurous: generally unwilling to take risks; exaggerating the importance or likelihood of possible negative outcomes.
exhibiting learned helplessness: underestimating one's ability or influence in a given situation; feeling powerless.
stubborn: tending to reject suggestions or constructive criticism from others who listen and care; unable or reluctant to implement the suggestions of others for one's own benefit."

[UKWildcat1981]

As Seinfeld used to say" Make your money work for you" best advice I ever got.

[Lalalally]

Originally Posted by Stratford, Ct. Resident

Doesn't buy natural hair either. Can't tell you the number of bald men my age in Ferrari's/Porsche's/etc. that look at my head(of hair) with absolute lust in their eyes.

[bobtn]

OP"Not once in my career, at any company, did I look at my managers/directors and think to myself, "geez...I would love to be in their shoes someday."

That's odd, as in other threads, you've complained about never being promoted, and about that sibling of yours already being promoted. So I guess not once did they look at you and say "We'd like to promote him someday".

Now that symbiotic relationship works perfectly. A staff level guy wanting to stay a staff level guy, with superiors in full agreement.

[nep321]

Originally Posted by bobtn

OP"Not once in my career, at any company, did I look at my managers/directors and think to myself, "geez...I would love to be in their shoes someday."

That's odd, as in other threads, you've complained about never being promoted, and about that sibling of yours already being promoted. So I guess not once did they look at you and say "We'd like to promote him someday".

Now that symbiotic relationship works perfectly. A staff level guy wanting to stay a staff level guy, with superiors in full agreement.

Actually, I don't mind being staff level for a long period of time. Career advancement is not a natural human desire. It's a "value" that has been instilled and indoctrinated in American society. It doesn't need to apply to all of us, as this is a free country and we can lead our lives however we wish.

When it boils down to it, what is career advancement for, really? Money. If someone wants to make a lot of money, kudos to them. But not all of us care for it.

[bobtn]

07-02-2014, 09:16 PM
[SIZE=5]nep321[/SIZE]
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Today, my younger brother had just announced on Facebook that he is being promoted to an IT Management position at a company he has been employed with for five years now, after college. It's a major insurance company in CT. He is probably going to be making more money than I am now (probably around $80K, since he was currently making $75K), and he's only 27 years old. He is gay, single, has a house for three years now, two cars and plenty of money for vacations and stuff. And he has had a boyfriend for almost two years now. He's always happy no matter what.

Contrast that to me....

I'm also gay, single, but 30 years old. I have a master's degree in accounting (but don't like it) and here I am on my fourth job, making only $75K here in CT, at staff level still. I've been staff for all 7 years of my career now. "

You posted the above just 7 months ago.

[nep321]

Originally Posted by bobtn

07-02-2014, 09:16 PM
[SIZE=5]nep321[/SIZE]
Senior Member
befriend
[SIZE=2]Status:[/SIZE] [SIZE=2] "Get me out of Fairfield County NOW!!!" [/SIZE](set 25 days ago)[SIZE=2] [/SIZE]
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Norwalk, CT
7,279 posts, read 5,563,850 times
Reputation: 3986




Today, my younger brother had just announced on Facebook that he is being promoted to an IT Management position at a company he has been employed with for five years now, after college. It's a major insurance company in CT. He is probably going to be making more money than I am now (probably around $80K, since he was currently making $75K), and he's only 27 years old. He is gay, single, has a house for three years now, two cars and plenty of money for vacations and stuff. And he has had a boyfriend for almost two years now. He's always happy no matter what.

Contrast that to me....

I'm also gay, single, but 30 years old. I have a master's degree in accounting (but don't like it) and here I am on my fourth job, making only $75K here in CT, at staff level still. I've been staff for all 7 years of my career now. "

You posted the above just 7 months ago.

Lol. I was just complaining that day. Really, I don't care about his career progress compared to mine. Why should I? Good for him.

[Stephy0519]

Originally Posted by mlassoff

I wonder how many more successful people would disagree with you. I do...

Working hard doesn't necessarily equate with more hours. At all. I do agree about working smart--I too, get exceeds expectations and I was the least tenured consultant, yet the first taken on full time at my hospital, because the work I do and how I do it was noticed.

I've said it time and time again....Same age as you, great boyfriend, great friends, great career (that I love), great health, very little-no stress, and a great social life.

Also, many of the more "upper-upper" class people I know, with careers, do the same thing I do--and lead a stress free, happy life.

I think you are just an unhappy person, who doesn't know what they truly want for themselves or who they truly want to be.


I'm done feeding nep in this post.

[bobtn]

You also shouldn't care what the 1% make. Class envy is worthless, whether in a state where it takes 678k or 378k to be in the 1%, that is NOT changing the salary levels of the 99%. Those vary wildly, based largely on experience, skills, work ethic, ct..in short the harder one is to replace, the more one is likely to make.

[nep321]

Originally Posted by Stephy0519

Working hard doesn't necessarily equate with more hours. At all. I do agree about working smart--I too, get exceeds expectations and I was the least tenured consultant, yet the first taken on full time at my hospital, because the work I do and how I do it was noticed.

I've said it time and time again....Same age as you, great boyfriend, great friends, great career (that I love), great health, very little-no stress, and a great social life.

Also, many of the more "upper-upper" class people I know, with careers, do the same thing I do--and lead a stress free, happy life.

I think you are just an unhappy person, who doesn't know what they truly want for themselves or who they truly want to be.


I'm done feeding nep in this post.

Great. Sounds like you have the perfect life.