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I have known other people who sort of block out food restrictions similar to the OPs. I had a friend who was not diabetic but very overweight. When she would visit her mother from where she had moved out of state, her mother would wring her hands over how much "Jill" weighed and have conversations with other family members about how much she feared Jill would die young of a heart attack.
And then, she'd send her home with an entire cake. A homemade-from-scratch, frosted cake in a lovely Tupperware cake container. Jill lived alone. The cake was just for HER. And pack a big sandwich plus cookies and candy bars so she wouldn't get hungry on the four-hour drive home. It was the weirdest thing, and it happened every time she visited. Plus, while my friend was there, I would often be invited for dinner. Everything had cheese sauce on it. The food was delicious, but it was fattening as hell.
In some families, food equals love. Maybe that's the psychology behind this behavior.
I think the OP can just quietly reaffirm his dietary restrictions and mention his "numbers" if necessary, as others have suggested. Not overly so, but enough that perhaps the message will get through that watching his diet is an intricate and necessary part of life for him.
[quote=Jimrob1;30954994]
I don't believe it is a lack of knowledge. I believe it is a lack of empathy concerning family members and Diabetes. I don't know how to explain that, I just noticed she has always offered a lot of sweets to the Diabetics in my immediate family. She seems bored and turned off if I mentioned I have to count carbs each day. It's part of why I hesitated staying here until I got an apt
Thanks for your comments.[/quote
I don't know what it is in other cases but I do know one case where it was truly intentional. A friend's husband was diabetic. She would deliberately load the meals with sweets - and said so. Said she 'had to have her sweets'. She once bragged that she ate sugar directly from the sugar bowl just to annoy him.
A couple of years ago, friends took me out to a birthday dinner. The meal was fine until dessert time. They didn't want dessert but had pre-ordered a huge cake and ice cream dessert for me. I said I couldn't eat it and asked them to eat it. No, they said, it's your birthday; eat it. I took two bites and shoved it aside which didn't make them happy at all. They complained all the way home about my ungratefulness and how I spoiled all that they had tried to do for me.
On the brighter side, I had a dear neighbor who delighted in bringing home sweets and hanging some on my door. Then I was diagnosed with diabetes. She immediately switched to fruits.
So, there are reasons galore - some unintentional; some intentional.
That said, an idea. Can you take what they serve (the parts you can eat) and cut the serving sizes far down. You'll be eating their cooking, just not as much. Perhaps you have tried that? If not, go for it. Then, while they munch down on all those no-no snacks, take a good walk and enjoy nature. :-)
And, are they against you actually cooking their evening meal since they work all day? Most people enjoy coming home to an already-cooked meal after a hectic day.
From my experience you might have to let them as well as others label you a "finicky eater". They will never understand why you won’t celebrate food with them. I am not a diabetic but I have five siblings who are. Long before any of them became diabetic I worked a social service job and had to care for a T-1 diabetic. While trying to educate myself on food prep, I came across the phrase "everyone should eat like a diabetic" so I started to over 20 years ago.
The funny thing is I was the overweight one with the poor dietary habits who was supposed to become a diabetic. My diabetic mother always warned me about how I ate.
It’s very hard on me to always decline offers to drink beer and eat meat or do pizza and hang out. But I just let people peg me as a vegetarian or a finicky food guy.
They really don’t want you fall off the wagon they want you to break your regime just once for them or only when you are around them. I have been around a lot of diabetics and too many of them feel like they can eat whatever they want as long as they take their medicine.
I found myself in a situation where I have had to move in with family for awhile. I lost my pension quite suddenly and without any warning, so I have moved in with my Sister and Brother-In-Law. It has been a huge adjustment to accept having to do this. I'm sure it is for them also, and I try to stay out of their way as much as I can. Though I love them dearly I hesitated doing this, but I had no choice.
They have been wonderful and very kind but there is a problem when it comes to meals. I really only eat an evening meal with them. They work full time and I'm out looking for a part time job, since Social Security only allows me to earn so much now. So the problem is I rather prepare my own meals since I can't eat like they do. I don't think they want people cooking at different times in the evening. There is a lot of evening ice cream and sweets and just plain junk. They seem hurt if I don't eat with them, and they have some good meals but not always. I might add thru the years I have noticed both of them, seem to have no real sympathy for a Diabetic and food. I finally told my brother-in-law yesterday when he wanted me to come and eat pasta, texas toast, fried potatoes, heavy meat sauce. I said I can't I ate pasta yesterday and its just to many carbs for me. He seemed hurt and told my sister so. I certainly don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I can't eat like they do. My brother-in-law is very overweight and under a doctors care for it. My sister was the same with my parents who were both Diabetics. Always bringing ice cream and cookies to them. I honestly wonder how people so wonderful can come across as so lacking in caring for a person that is under strick diet control.
It is wonderful being able to stay here for awhile until I can find affordable housing, but I don't know how to live with Non Diabetics that just don't seem to understand. I'm certainly not trying to change their meal routine. Again Id rather just eat my own meals but its not my kitchen. So what to do without hurting their feelings and stay on my routine I have had for decades.
In your situation I would give them a copy of a good diabetic food guide and maybe a copy of what your dietician has outlined for you as far as requirements for your daily food intake.
If their feelings get hurt so be it, better that than your numbers run into the 200's because they do not eat properly and insist that you do the same.
I am not diabetic but my husband is and so are very good friends who dine with us all the time and we always have plenty of room for someone who needs a wee bit of a helping hand.
From my experience you might have to let them as well as others label you a "finicky eater". They will never understand why you won’t celebrate food with them. I am not a diabetic but I have five siblings who are. Long before any of them became diabetic I worked a social service job and had to care for a T-1 diabetic. While trying to educate myself on food prep, I came across the phrase "everyone should eat like a diabetic" so I started to over 20 years ago.
The funny thing is I was the overweight one with the poor dietary habits who was supposed to become a diabetic. My diabetic mother always warned me about how I ate.
It’s very hard on me to always decline offers to drink beer and eat meat or do pizza and hang out. But I just let people peg me as a vegetarian or a finicky food guy.
They really don’t want you fall off the wagon they want you to break your regime just once for them or only when you are around them. I have been around a lot of diabetics and too many of them feel like they can eat whatever they want as long as they take their medicine.
Why would you decline this all the time? Everything in moderation and accounted for like we do with my husband who is diabetic and I am not.
His numbers have been stable since 14 days after he was diagnosed because we plan well and he still eats pizza, will have a glass of wine or a beer occassionally and eats meat when he wants.
From my experience you might have to let them as well as others label you a "finicky eater". They will never understand why you won’t celebrate food with them. I am not a diabetic but I have five siblings who are. Long before any of them became diabetic I worked a social service job and had to care for a T-1 diabetic. While trying to educate myself on food prep, I came across the phrase "everyone should eat like a diabetic" so I started to over 20 years ago.
The funny thing is I was the overweight one with the poor dietary habits who was supposed to become a diabetic. My diabetic mother always warned me about how I ate.
It’s very hard on me to always decline offers to drink beer and eat meat or do pizza and hang out. But I just let people peg me as a vegetarian or a finicky food guy.
They really don’t want you fall off the wagon they want you to break your regime just once for them or only when you are around them. I have been around a lot of diabetics and too many of them feel like they can eat whatever they want as long as they take their medicine.
Vegetarian question. If you avoid meat, what do you use for protein entrees? I know a few things but not many and none really satisfactory if I'm to do my own meals, not use Amy's.
Why would you decline this all the time? Everything in moderation and accounted for like we do with my husband who is diabetic and I am not.
His numbers have been stable since 14 days after he was diagnosed because we plan well and he still eats pizza, will have a glass of wine or a beer occassionally and eats meat when he wants.
Perhaps because, if you do it once, they expect you to do it all the time? The difference is that your husband is controlling his own diet and that does work. I do it also - although not pizza which I love or beer which I do not love. But, when someone else is trying to control it, it's a whole new ball game.
You can add tofu to almost everything. I use it in soups, sauces, etc. I drink soy milk as well, the unflavored kind. If I need sweetness say for cereal, I add Stevia. I found a protein bar that has only 20 carbs and 20 grams protein, Pro Protein bars. Not sure about the vegetarian aspect as I am not one exactly.
You can add tofu to almost everything. I use it in soups, sauces, etc. I drink soy milk as well, the unflavored kind. If I need sweetness say for cereal, I add Stevia. I found a protein bar that has only 20 carbs and 20 grams protein, Pro Protein bars. Not sure about the vegetarian aspect as I am not one exactly.
Thank you for the other ideas. I mustn't forget protein bars. There is a new brand on the market whose name evades me right now. Their yogurt bars are very good.
Why would you decline this all the time? Everything in moderation and accounted for like we do with my husband who is diabetic and I am not.
His numbers have been stable since 14 days after he was diagnosed because we plan well and he still eats pizza, will have a glass of wine or a beer occassionally and eats meat when he wants.
These are weekly gatherings for beer and steaks or payday pizza parties which are fairly routine and on an ongoing schedule. I have gone occasionally but they know I am not "one of the gang"
Most of us as well as diabetics need to focus on the balance between nutrition and calories. Pizza has too many calories for a food that has hardly any nutrition. When I had to prepare meals that were approved by the Health Department, we could not claim Pizza as a component of the meal .We could serve it, but like potato chips the nutritional requirements had to come from others foods in the meal. High calorie foods that don’t pack a lot of nutrition are foods most of us like but our bodies have to work hard to digest with no gain for its effort.
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