How do you tell a woman she needs to get in shape ? (low carb, gluten)
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You're just being ridiculously insensitive about this topic. Your fat bashing just doesn't jive with me.
Where am I fat bashing?
So we've reached a point in society where not wanting a parter of a different race/culture is racist and not wanting an overweight partner is fat bashing? ok.
I would never allow myself to get into that position. It was a hypothetical situation and you know it. So stop playing dumb (perhaps that cannot be controlled)
You believe that you will always be as you are now, or that you will always have a say in what you look like, which means your lesson, whenever you learn it, will hurt.
Yes, if a partner gained 200 lbs, a committed spouse would stay with them because THAT IS WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOU ARE COMMITTED.
I have seen it with a couple where a lifetime smoking habit disintegrated a lovely woman into a hacking, wheezing skeleton. Not cancer, but emphysema, and certainly brought on by her choice to continue her unhealthy habit, but her husband stayed with her because he is not a shallow, petty *sshole.
I've SEEN IT MANY TIMES. Your outlook is wrong and sad and you need to examine your thoughts on self-worth and true love.
No comment on this particular case, but I'll say two things in general. IMO, there's a big difference between leaving someone over a pre-existing condition (one they had at the start of a relationship and you knew about) and leaving someone over a condition they developed after the relationship started. And there's a big difference between leaving someone over something they have control over (diet, personality, interests, etc...) and leaving someone over something they don't generally have control over (injury from an accident, disease, etc...).
I would never allow myself to get into that position. It was a hypothetical situation and you know it. So stop playing dumb (perhaps that cannot be controlled)
It's sad that you continually resort to ad hominem attacks when people challenge your position or ask you to think more critically about it.
Can you please, PLEASE! link those methods you used to lose those pounds? Or even your source for that info. I need to lose pounds so is my husband.
Simple. instead of eating of 5 cheeseburgers, you eat 4 until u stop losing weight. Then decrease the number of cheesburgers you eat until you reach the desired weight. It's called being at a caloric deficit. Nutrition 101
It's your diction that shows just how naive you are. The hell I am naive. I can support and back up my position, easily. I know what current nutrition and obesity research says. I've spent years studying it. I've also lost well over 100 lbs by implementing the methods of the current data.
And still firmly hold the position that your "belief," your approach, is not only naive, but downright fallacious, erroneous, and simple-minded. It lacks understanding for why this epidemic exists, and no, it has little to do with "reckless eating and laziness," an uninformed belief, a misconception. When we know better, we do better. When we have better, current, research, we make better, educated, informed decisions. If, say, Susie is not familiar with current research then she's less likely to make better, sound, and healthier decisions that are sustainable.
If Susie has been following the protocol of the standard American diet and CW, and doesn't know of any other approach, it stands to reason that she will struggle and face challenges as a result of the information she has received. She and many others. If someone is fed bad information in the guise of "medical advice" how is it reckless? If said bad information induced a metabolic response that then contributed to more excess weight gain, it is not a situation of laziness or lack of "willpower." It is a metabolic, hormonal issue that needs to first be understood before going any further. One can not effectively solve a problem without knowing the proper steps to solve it, and those proper steps of "join a gym and put the chips down" are not it. If it were the case then more and more people should be "getting fit" since this dogma is so heavily preached. Perhaps a simple lesson on hormones and their physiologic effects is in order. Simply being active and participating in mud races does not mean one is knowledgeable and informed on current research, and the ill effects of the standard American diet.
I've lost weight as well, and I've struggled with being overweight as well as having EDNOS
Again, weight loss isn't rocket science. Calorie deficit+exercise.
More people aren't getting fit because being overweight is the norm. There's no reason to get fit in a society where being overweight is socially acceptable (versus Asia, where it's very common to tell someone they are fat out loud)
Sure, there are medical exceptions, but when 200 lbs Sally is at Wal-Mart using an electric scooter instead of walking to buy her bags of potato chips, I guess there's something to say about that.
There are things a man can do including surgery,rings to use during relations, and injections. It's not commonly done, and luckily for men most women wouldn't ask for any of this.
Lol, none of those things are natural, and seriously doubt that they work. Kinda like those magic pills they sell on late night tv. If they did every man would be walking around with a 10 inch dong.
There's a difference between "Honey, I've noticed you haven't been enjoying some of your usual activities lately." than "Hey, so, I think the numbers on the scale are creepin' up a bit there." and "I am concerned for your health. How about we enter a Spartan race." when he really means to say "You're unattractive to me now, and it's bothering me, but I'm going to feed you this "for your health" speech because I think or believe this approach will be better received." Disingenuous.
Also, the advice is only effective if the giver knows what the heck they're talking about. Can their advice be properly supported? What if their advice is bad advice? What if said individual proposes his/her partner become vegan or vegetarian? What data supports that? The diet industry is full of competing and varying "advice" and ideas, so there's a good chance the advice giver may not know how to properly broach the subject or whether their advice is sound. Just saying "Let's go for a swim" or "Let's eat this chicken salad instead of..." doesn't actually tackle the issue. It's like getting a depressed person out for some sunshine and exercise. It's a band aid, a temporary fix to a real problem that needs to be addressed and tackled at its core.
Some things don't require a lot of effort to see results, but knowing the root cause, the real issue at hand, is how results, sustainable results, are seen. Telling someone "this is bad for you" doesn't explain why it is so. It's bad? According to what data and current research? If that's the case, support it. Explaining the mechanism behind why drinking that fruit smoothie from Jamba Juice (because it's obviously healthy) may not be the best idea due to its high glycemic index is better than "it's bad for you." And the majority haven't the slightest clue why this or that isn't the healthiest choice available.
Many people give bad advice, because many people have been fed bad advice. So they only regurgitate when they've been fed and told. A whole host of logical fallacies at play here.
I tend to agree with what you're saying here, but I think that a good first step is always to try to eliminate junk food, access to junk food, get a bit more exercise of some sort, etc.
I agree it's not "the answer," but what I see on here plenty of times are people finding someone and thinking "she'd be perfect if she only lost X pounds."
Um... no. She was fine before you met her and someone else will like her with X pounds on her and won't make her feel like crap for being herself.
I do agree that people need to research diet and fitness and not just go on anecdotes and crap they read on Buzzfeed. Absolutely. I don't do low carb, but I do lower carb than most people. It does take weight off. Anything that's processed is something I eat rarely, and I am the sort who will go out for a cheeseburger and either eat the bun and skip the fries, or eat half the bun and a few fries. I have realized that I tend to find sweets VERY sweet because I don't eat them very often (unless you count organic oatmeal cookies and dark chocolate... even those things are eaten VERY sparingly).
Soo... if I go to a nice restaurant with my husband, do we get dessert? Hell yes. We split one.
Do I eat dessert every night? If you count a small square of dark chocolate and some fruit? I reckon. If dessert means ice cream and cake? Good grief. No.
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You believe that you will always be as you are now, or that you will always have a say in what you look like, which means your lesson, whenever you learn it, will hurt.
Yes, if a partner gained 200 lbs, a committed spouse would stay with them because THAT IS WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOU ARE COMMITTED.
I have seen it with a couple where a lifetime smoking habit disintegrated a lovely woman into a hacking, wheezing skeleton. Not cancer, but emphysema, and certainly brought on by her choice to continue her unhealthy habit, but her husband stayed with her because he is not a shallow, petty *sshole.
I've SEEN IT MANY TIMES. Your outlook is wrong and sad and you need to examine your thoughts on self-worth and true love.
You didn't read what I initially said, did you? Reading is truly not fundamental on this site.
I've already said it is NOT DIVORCE WORTHY. I'm not sure what part of that some of you are not getting. You all cherry pick in order to get your granny panties bunched up.
That is where the OP's question comes into play. It would then be perfectly acceptable for the husband or wife to suggest eating healthier/exercising.
And where did I ever encourage leaving a spouse over an illness such as emphysema? Seems like you all enjoy twisting words in order to make yourselves feel better.
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