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I’d love for my child to get all A’s, who wouldn’t? That being said, if she’s doing her best I’m satisfied with that. Her best has always been A’s and B’s except for Math.Fortunately, she finally started understanding Math and now gets B’s. She works very hard to get the grades she does so I’m happy with it.
Several issues with MIT etc.:
1). Don't recall specifically but MIT requires 20% (might be 25%) of each freshman class to come from families in which neither parent has a degree.
2). Both MIT and Harvard employ "geographical quotas" to the point that a couple of years ago both stopped publishing state by state acceptance data. The rub is assuming identical metrics if one is from New England, New York and California ones chance are VASTLY better than if one with is from Mississippi, Louisiana, Alabama, Idaho etc. The New England part of that makes sense - the overwhelming CA bias does not.
3). The best school in the country that employs mostly on the merits admissions is Cal-Tech. Harvey Mudd is up there too.
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My kids are a little older but both are academic overachievers too. My advice would be to keep the proverbial powder dry for graduate/professional school. One of my son's friends from medical school is a Penn graduate with not quite $200K in undergraduate debt. IMO scarce is the BS degree worth $200K debt.
Thank you EDS for the info. We realize these are all reach schools, but we’ll see what happens. At MIT, they practice gender parity, so may help being a female in engineering. I think the male admittance rate was 6% and female admittance was 13%. She is thinking ChemE, Materials Science, or BioMech fields. She will also do a music supplement as part of her application.
MIT and Harvard seem to admit fewer from the midwest compared to other zones. We are in a competitive HS and they typically admit 1 or 2 of our students to Harvard and MIT each year. According to my daughter, Stanford admits maybe 1 student from our HS every 10 years or so. We are touring Stanford and Berkeley over springbreak.
We toured Caltech last summer. For some reason, my daughter did not click with the school, though I loved the area. I think the school felt too small and not urban enough for her. She prefers big city schools. She also has this impression they do not focus enough on the undergrad - I’m not sure where she’s getting that info..
My husband went to Caltech. They do look for geographic diversity. I like to joke he was the token Nebraskan, but he was well qualified to go there as well.
Interesting someone would have that much undergrad debt as the student loan debt is capped at $57,500 for undergrads. What'd he do, buy a house? Seriously, he must have a car loan and a lot of credit card debt as well. https://studentaid.ed.gov/sa/types/l...d-unsubsidized
My wife was born in Nebraska.......I'll have to use the token Nebraskan line on her soon.
Frankly, I don't know how the kid piled up so much debt. But the $57K limit you noted applies only to government backed loans.
In my family, anything under an A was unacceptable. I graduated with above a 4.0 in high school, though I was a B+ overall in college/grad school. When/if I have children, I will demand that they try their hardest but, as others have written, don't know if I'll have a minimum acceptable grade that I'm looking for.
Are you wealthy? Do grades matter for your children's outlook in life? I'm genuinely curious as yours is a position that I don't come across frequently.
This discussion is kind of a spinoff from the homework thread. There, a lot of posters were saying that they didn't think homework was necessary or they just barely did homework.
So, I'm wondering what people consider to be their goal in school and what is acceptable as far as grades are concerned.
Passing. (As long as they have the skills to move forward.) My children's grades are only their problem until the school calls me. Then the school AND I are their problem. They like to avoid that. Generally, they do very well. I'm always available to help.
Within a few years post-academia, regardless of level, no one cares how well you did. If you have the degree, skill to do the job, and are personable enough to get on with it, the grades will be irrelevant. (I never did homework in school... I was in detention for it every day. I also had the highest score on all quizzes, presentations, and tests, in classroom or standardized. My teachers loved me. My professors loved me. I had interest in the subject but no interest in wasting time on homework. In college, I'd often just submit the essays and arrive for tests because I'd rather work than listen to my classmates be chastised for wearing pajamas, not paying attention, or being stupid... like not knowing how to write a simple paragraph.)
No one cares that I had a 4.2GPA for my AA in Bus.Admin, then left because I didn't want to get a BA in it at a cost of $40K, sales paid more, and I wanted to start a family. The person picked over me for that cushy, well-paid, awesome-hours office job will have a 2.0GPA for their BA in Ancient Philosophy, $120K in student loans, and no experience. I stay in sales because it's what I'm good at and I have proof. I've literally had interviewers - at second and third interviews - say how LUCKY I am to not have student loans... and they want to give those jobs to people with oppressive student loans to pay back. I get passed over for having made prudent choices in order to avoid oppressive debt and stress. Nothing to do with luck. So yes - making sales is my trade.
I encourage our children to go into trade. Plumber, electrician, hair stylist, carpenter, mechanic. Nurse or Doctor. Architect. Surveyor. Your profession doesn't have to be your hobby. Do what you do well for good pay, SO THAT you can afford a lifestyle that allows you your hobbies and interests.
I care that our children's teachers and peers and their parents say my children are lovely and kind but have good sense and boundaries. I care that they pass and graduate. I don't care how high their grades are. I'm proud of their pro-active interest in clubs and starting clubs. I care that they can communicate with different people of any age who have different ideas.
Their grade is irrelevant unless it's so low that it affects their outcome (ie needing X.XX GPA to keep a scholarship.)
I always wondered how former "honor roll" students felt when they saw C students getting ahead in the business world or winding up with higher paying jobs.
It's awful, but not for being jealous... it's resentment toward your parents for messing you up, socially. Resentment for not being at peace with yourself and resentment for not enjoying things that are probably enjoyable for everyone else, but because there's no set goal, are not enjoyable for you. This is why I always excel in sales. I have no tolerance for achieving anything less than the best, for myself, personally. I am always top sales in every job. This "hunger" is acceptable in sales but is SO NOT acceptable in ANY other job.
I'm in a lifelong battle with myself, to train this out of me... it's very difficult. I have two modes: Achieving Me and Chill Me. I have many friends who are friends with one of those people and only two CLOSE friends who can understand both... when I walk in the door from kicking a$$ at work, then melt into Chill Me, who spends 2 hours cooking an elaborate meal, drinking wine while chatting with half a dozen neighbors who pop in to visit, helping my children with homework, and watching documentaries or shows streaming from my laptop on the kitchen counter. Both of Me are great... but I cannot seem to bring Chill Me to work. Ever. That's not good for an office job, apparently. I have NEVER had "friends from work." I once almost did... but I'd trained him to take my job so I could get a promotion... and then I married him. I married my only sorta-friend from work... 16 years ago.
eta: I am partially-estranged from my parents simply because I say NO so often. No to religious events. No to 4-6hr "dinners." No to attending celebrations of my many siblings' MANY achievements in MANY states. I simply congratulate them, send a card or a gift, and rarely attend unless the Celebrated One specifically asks. I am, apparently, supposed to laud their achievements across the land and travel to attend them as well. And also, create spawn with their own achievement-celebrations for my extended family to attend. I've opted out. My parents are disappointed. My siblings understand. Surprisingly - heh, NOT because they really are awesome - our children do have achievement-celebrations. I invite whom they ask me to invite. It has never included my parents, even though I've offered. "They end up telling my friends' parents how awesome we are and never ask them about their own child. And then they ask our teachers how well we did and record it. It's embarrassing."
My wife was born in Nebraska.......I'll have to use the token Nebraskan line on her soon.
Frankly, I don't know how the kid piled up so much debt. But the $57K limit you noted applies only to government backed loans.
Where in Nebraska? DH is from Omaha. I like to say he's a city boy from Nebraska.
True. That's why I asked if he bought a house! Seriously, you can have a car loan and credit card debt too. Or maybe the kid is exaggerating.
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