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Nothing wrong with paying bills, but don't you think it's a bit extreme to pass the plate around 2x a session? Come on, who do they think they are fooling? The flock knows how to watch expenses, but the leaders are exempt? Here's a real example, my local parish decided a few years ago to undertake this great big capital campaign to raise significant funds for the "upgrade" of the pews, windows and to create an additional meeting place". Did they really need to do that? Now after exhausting the parishoners means, they annoy them by passing the plate around 2x every weekend leading people to go less and less as they become weary of the gimme-gimme. Toss in the annual appeal and now that the summer months are coming, here come the missions looking for guess what? Is it any wonder attendance is dropping off?
We generally only have 1 collection in my parish. The 2nd is usually (rare) for some bishop's appeal.
We've also been told that we should be as generous as we can given our means, but we should only give what we can give. If that is nothing, then its nothing. Even for programs/religious ed that have costs for them, there is always a note saying... Please register even if you cannot afford the cost.... call xxx-xxxx or stop by the office for assistance
Again....look how many religions ask for a tithe. Would you prefer just writing a check once a year for 10% of your income or "endure" a second plate passing.
As a practicing Catholic who believes in what you call "hocus pocus", I take offense to people critizing my personal religious beliefs. Everyone is entitled to raise their children in whatever belief system they wish to. The children are free to make up their own mind when they grow up.
Everyone is entitled to believe what they want to believe, however being criticial or mocking someone's else beliefs is uncalled for.
If you dont believe in it, fine, dont be critical of those who do. If you feel that strongly, then don't be a hypocrite and go to a party and give a gift for something you don't actually believe in.
As a non-practicing Catholic, I WISH that it worked this way. Unfortunately, family obligations TRUMP whether I actually believe in a sacrament or not. To think that everyone in attendance at a communion celebration is not being hypocritical, and REALLY believes, is naive on your part. People do things out of obligation, tradition, or just because they have to payback the individuals who came to their child's function.
I am a wedding rehearsal coordinator for our parish. We relieve the parish priest of having to conduct a rehearsal for the couple. Why rehearse many have asked me? Why? Simple, because those that are "regulars" will know what to do and we are done in tops, a 1/2 hour or less, if all arrive on time. We get to show the readers, who may or may not be parishioners the pulpit from which they will read and they can get the "feel" of what it is like to actually stand there and read prior to the wedding. The bride and groom have the opportunity to have a dry run with me as the presider, when they are relaxed. All questions are answered, all paperwork, such as licenses are signed and music gone over and everyone leaves happy.
Now on the other hand, if you are not "regulars' or even occasional attendees, and perhaps this is the first time you have set foot inside a church since your confirmation, then you have the benefit of at least being familiar with the church and the "mechanics" of the big day. I can tell you that in 95% of the cases the "non-regular" couples are simply doing what Mom, Dad, Grandma, or Grandpa want and have little to no desire to be there. Many times they would rather be on a beach or anywhere other than in the church.
Often times sadly it is all about the aisle for the bride, and that is why the church.
They freely tell me this stuff because as soon as I introduce myself, they are told that I am a volunteer in the parish and I am only there to help them and not judge, lecture or preach. I will do anything within reason to make their wedding day as personalized as it can be according to the norms of the church. No, you can't have your adorable little tea cup yorkie wearing a pearl collar walk down the aisle before you and bring up your rings: but you can have a small table that holds pictures of your deceased parent or grandparent, if that is what you want.
It can be difficult to understand why the couple is in a church at all if they don't believe, until you understand the dynamic of the family.
I am not overly religious, not a regular at church on Sunday morning. I feel that religious education is one more form of passing a family's traditions and values to the children. My children will receive/have received their sacraments and as they enter the adult world they will be able to decide for themselves if they wish to continue as a Catholic or not. My oldest has declared himself an atheist; we'll see what happens when the day comes and he marries.
I agree with this.
Kids do not make all of the choices in life. And there are some that parents are better equipt to handle. This would appear to be one of them.
Most people go through an atheist or agnostic period. I was OK for confirmation but soon after, I began to question.
My kids have always complained about church attendance, but lately, have been happier about their faith.
My son even chose an important figure in our denominational history as the basis for one of his senior essays.
Evan if your children don't love it now, it is good to have something to rebel against - and good to have something to return to, at some point.
As a non-practicing Catholic, I WISH that it worked this way. Unfortunately, family obligations TRUMP whether I actually believe in a sacrament or not. To think that everyone in attendance at a communion celebration is not being hypocritical, and REALLY believes, is naive on your part. People do things out of obligation, tradition, or just because they have to payback the individuals who came to their child's function.
I am not saying that some if not more are doing this under family obligations. You dont have to believe either, but going out of RESPECT for someone else's beliefs and giving a gift because of that RESPECT is not too much to ask for.
What I meant by the hypocritical is that if you really dont believe and dont want to be there because of your beliefs, then dont go.
I'm not Jewish and have been to many a bar/bat mitzvahs. I've been to many a religious celebration that is not Catholic. I go because I RESPECT my friends/relatives and RESPECT their beliefs even though they are not mine. I do not mock their beliefs or call them hocus pocus when they aren't around.
Kids do not make all of the choices in life. And there are some that parents are better equipt to handle. This would appear to be one of them.
Most people go through an atheist or agnostic period. I was OK for confirmation but soon after, I began to question.
My kids have always complained about church attendance, but lately, have been happier about their faith.
My son even chose an important figure in our denominational history as the basis for one of his senior essays.
Evan if your children don't love it now, it is good to have something to rebel against - and good to have something to return to, at some point.
I believe that you have to give the kids some foundation... when they become adults they can make their own choices. Short of picking a belief system that encourages violence or harm to others, I will stand by their choice when they are adults.
I believe that you have to give the kids some foundation... when they become adults they can make their own choices. Short of picking a belief system that encourages violence or harm to others, I will stand by their choice when they are adults.
This thread is going off topic and I am guessing will be locked, but I have to ask... why does this foundation have to be religious? Isn't "don't be a jerk to other people, help when you can, do what you can" good enough? Or is it only good enough when a religious figure says it?
I was raised without religion (sans the boring religious class I had to go through in maybe 7th grade) and I'd say I turned out just fine.
This thread is going off topic and I am guessing will be locked, but I have to ask... why does this foundation have to be religious? Isn't "don't be a jerk to other people, help when you can, do what you can" good enough? Or is it only good enough when a religious figure says it?
I was raised without religion (sans the boring religious class I had to go through in maybe 7th grade) and I'd say I turned out just fine.
Never said it had to be religious.... but it can be religious....
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Here's a real example, my local parish decided a few years ago to undertake this great big capital campaign to raise significant funds for the "upgrade" of the pews, windows and to create an additional meeting place". Did they really need to do that? Now after exhausting the parishoners means, they annoy them by passing the plate around 2x every weekend leading people to go less and less as they become weary of the gimme-gimme. Toss in the annual appeal and now that the summer months are coming, here come the missions looking for guess what? Is it any wonder attendance is dropping off?
