Last thoughts of 5 years in Minneapolis before I leave the Midwest (St. Paul: income, income tax)

[wushuliu]

Originally Posted by MJ7

so a guy cant be classy if he isnt wearing the "proper" clothing?

or a guy is considered to be classy because of the clothes he wears?

either way it doesnt sound very good

Be careful, you might get accused of needing remedial english.

Never mind that 'dressing well' is extremely relative and frankly has no foundation in reality as to what attracts women. But let me guess. A black guy who dresses 'classy' is recommended over say worn jeans, boots, t-shirt and a cowboy hat. Every country music video you've ever seen is a lie - if you're a black guy anyway.

Time to break out my classy pants! <--- defensive exclamation.

[wushuliu]

Originally Posted by readyformajorchange

Like it or not, the way you dress is your first impression on everybody you meet. If you dress classy, you will appear to others as classy. If you dress like a thug, you will appear to others as a thug. Same goes for hippy, cowboy, sporty.....etc. You should dress the way you want to be perceived and of course the way you feel most comfortable. Strangers have nothing else to go by.

Well I think we've all got a very recent example of how first impressions can go really really wrong... so let's not go there with suggesting to others how they should dress just because someone lacks the ability to judge appropriately. Never mind that 'the way you want to be perceived' is often not compatible with 'the way you feel most comfortable'.

Sometimes I like to wear my Ghostbusters shirt and I'd really hope someone doesn't see it and ask me if 'Bustin' makes me feeeel good'.

[golfgal]

Originally Posted by wushuliu

Be careful, you might get accused of needing remedial english.

Never mind that 'dressing well' is extremely relative and frankly has no foundation in reality as to what attracts women. But let me guess. A black guy who dresses 'classy' is recommended over say worn jeans, boots, t-shirt and a cowboy hat. Every country music video you've ever seen is a lie - if you're a black guy anyway.

Time to break out my classy pants! <--- defensive exclamation.

I have to agree with others-your clothing does make an impression. No one is going to think less of someone wearing boots and a cowboy hat but when your pants only go up to your knees and your boxers are hanging out and the oversized ball hat worn the wrong way with the 38 nose piercings, most people are not going to take your seriously.

Properly fitting clothing that is clean and worn where it is supposed to be worn is what we are talking about. Wearing a t-shirt and short, that are clean and properly fitting sans offensive language, to the mall is fine, but not appropriate in other settings like a job interview or wedding.

[Beenhere4ever]

Originally Posted by wushuliu

Be careful, you might get accused of needing remedial english.

Never mind that 'dressing well' is extremely relative and frankly has no foundation in reality as to what attracts women. But let me guess. A black guy who dresses 'classy' is recommended over say worn jeans, boots, t-shirt and a cowboy hat. Every country music video you've ever seen is a lie - if you're a black guy anyway.

Time to break out my classy pants! <--- defensive exclamation.

Or a classy guy who dresses like, say, Denzel Washington over a not so classy guy who dresses like Lil Wayne. But if you want a skanky woman, dress however. They are always looking for dates and not having much in the way of standards.

[readyformajorchange]

Originally Posted by wushuliu

Well I think we've all got a very recent example of how first impressions can go really really wrong... so let's not go there with suggesting to others how they should dress just because someone lacks the ability to judge appropriately. Never mind that 'the way you want to be perceived' is often not compatible with 'the way you feel most comfortable'.

Sometimes I like to wear my Ghostbusters shirt and I'd really hope someone doesn't see it and ask me if 'Bustin' makes me feeeel good'.

That is a really bad example and to prevent a debate that will go way off topic I will leave it at that. Profiling is real and usually accurate. Our government, law enforcement, teacher, psychologist....etc all profile and it starts with the first impression which will be your appearance. Like it or not.
Besides we all do it, it is natural. We have nothing else to go on but the way you dress and present yourself. If you see a women with Lee jeans, t-shirt, tennis shoes, and her hair in a pony tail most people are going to automatically assume she is a stay at home wive/mom. You see a women with 6 inch heels, a tight mini dress, and tons of makeup most will assume she's a hoe. You see a women with a long dress, long hair, no make up most will assume she is in a strict religion. The list goes on......for you to act like I said something wrong is just silly.
The way you feel most comfortable was meant as mental comfort, not physical. If I meant physical comfort I would live in yoga pants and tank tops! If you like to wear jeans, and cowboy boots that's great but don't get upset when somebody assumes your country! You want to wear all black and have your face full of piercings and covered in tattoos then don't get upset if somebody thinks your emo or a gutter punk as their referred to here. Appearance matters and it tells the world a little about you without actually talking to you.
As far as the Ghostbusters shirt goes, I would think you have some form of ties to the 80's and are either nostalgic or have a pretty good sense of humor.

[Beenhere4ever]

How you dress and act has an effect on other people's response. It is silly to deny what is so obvious. Are people judging you? Sure. They don't know you. They can only go by the surface. Study all animal species and you'll find it about universal. Not that the gap can't be overcome. But add an offensive attitude and the game's over. Some people are passive aggressive in their clothing and demeanor. They've prejudged other people and try to rope others into proving those prejudices are accurate. If a guy thinks women are snooty b-words, he can offend them to prove he is right. I'd say all people need to make some effort to be accessible. You can't complain "people don't know the real me" when you do what you can to insure there's a gap.

[WILWRadio]

Originally Posted by Beenhere4ever

What are you imagining? A guy with his boxer shorts on full display but still "classy"? Sorry, that vision just doesnt come together in my imagination.

Ted Bundy and Al Capone were sharp dressed men. I could go through history and find plenty of cases where well dress people were absolute monsters. You can't judge a book by the cover.

[readyformajorchange]

Hahahaaaa! Reaching much?!

[wushuliu]

Originally Posted by WILWRadio

Ted Bundy and Al Capone were sharp dressed men. I could go through history and find plenty of cases where well dress people were absolute monsters. You can't judge a book by the cover.

Right. This conversation is very weird. I've decided to just stick to lurking and prepare for my move back to Mpls.

[godinlg]

I think the point to take away from this discussion is that many -- perhaps most -- people will make initial assumptions about people based on their appearance. People disagree on whether such assumptions should be made or not, but I don't think anyone doubts that this happens very regularly. After making such assumptions, people often have made up their minds about whether they want to talk to the person or get to know them. Therefore, even though the assumptions may be completely incorrect (as in the case of Ted Bundy and Al Capone as pointed out), they still influence strangers' decisions. Part of why Ted Bundy could do what he did is because he appeared a certain way. Since there is no way to make everybody stop judging others based on their appearance, it is important to at least be aware of this phenomenon and to dress yourself accordingly. People are welcome to look however they want, but they should not be surprised that they will get treated differently depending on how they choose to present themselves.