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The danger for the idealist is losing touch with reality possibly. With the life that I have lead I could never be an idealist. That does not mean that I lack compassion for others.
As far as red states go, I think I can look at them individually. Alaska and Idaho are very different than states like Georgia or the Carolinas. The culture is totally different. Also, much more appealing to me.
Many people are racist but say they are not and they tolerate other ethnicities. I am mandated by the state to attend sensitivity training twice a year. They make you sign a piece of paper that you attended and then they throw it in a drawer in case they get sued they could say you were trained. As Tommy pointed out there are many, many white people that live in the burbs that would not be to thrilled if a minority family with 5 kids moved next to them. I'm being a realist here folks. I had a partner about 20 years ago that was house hunting in the burbs because he just got married and had a child. You know what he said, he would go into the bedrooms and look at photos of the kids on the walls, whether it be little league or a school photo. He said if he saw more than one minority in the photo he would skip that town and x them off the list. This goes on people and we could all be like we get along and this doesn't happen but this behavior is common all over the world unfortunately.
I know it is not your opinion JM so don't take this as a criticism toward you - but your partner was an a-hole.
Hold up a minute.....I think someone who is black (as I am) would tend to believe that parts of the South are going to be hostile to minorities. Anyone who knows history would think that. I also know that many Southern blacks are hostile to a person such as myself (light-skinned and Spanish-speaking). I remember going to Florida a few years ago and encountering huge amounts of hostility from the locals, even those at a prominent Black college, just because of what I looked like. I am not saying I would not like the South because it's home to too many racists, just that I know that historically racists have run things there and that although the South has changed greatly, elements of that bias still remain. I did point out, however, that there are parts of the South I would love to move to. I also know, having lived in Philadelphia, Boston, New Jersey and New York, that racists inhabit these areas too. My friends used to call parts of all of these places "up South".
There are a lot of misconceptions about the "South". History is just that.... HISTORY. It is not the present. I live and work in the south. I am neither black nor white and thus a minority and do not feel uncomfortable at all. My first job was an analyst in a manufacturing facility made up of 800 southern male employees. There were only about 40 women in the facility and 80% of the men were blue collar workers to give you an idea of the atmosphere there. It was the friendliest place I had ever worked in my life. When you walked into the cafeteria, you saw some tables were all black and some were all white and some were mixed. There was never a feeling un uncomforableness or anthing of the kind.
If you know anything at all about the south, you would also know that people down here are much more religous than up north. There's a church on every corner, you will find no obscene billboards anywhere and I'd be shocked if every person you came accross didn't call you sir even if you were colored purple and orange.
I grew up in Kendall Park, NJ where once my sister went to the supermarket and parked poorly only to get shouted racial slurrs by a white man. Does this mean that all NJ is full of ignorant, racist, bigots???? No? What do you mean? But, I don't feel comfortable there. I had a bad experience. Well, get over yourself. It happens everywhere. That doesn't mean that the whole region is tainted.
I agree you can never paint an entire area with one brush. However, I do have a friend from TN who told me there are many towns where "you can't be black after dark." And that is in 2008. Don't get me wrong, there are areas where you don't really want to be white after dark either. My point is all this hatred based on the color of ones skin is pathetic and disgusting and I really don't care if some people do not agree with me on this one. I know it is what it is, but what I'm saying is you have to try to make that mindset WRONG and educate people or things would NEVER change. And I for one am glad that we are not in the days of segregation, although apparently many others out there (not you MV) disagree.
I do have to disagree w/ you on one point though MV. A Church on every corner = nothing. And I am a devout Catholic and have very strong faith in God and Jesus. BUT some of the heinous things that are spouted at pulpits in the name of God in EVERY state and EVERY country make me sick. I love Ghandi's saying "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ." That could NOT be truer. When I see some of what people from ther right and the left (so don't hit me w/ Jeremiah Wright folks - I know it goes both ways) try to pass off as "Christian" it makes my blood boil.
I do think people are nicer on the surface in some areas out of the NE, but I don't think it's more than skin deep.
I'm not accusing red states or blue states of being racist... I agree there are racists of every type among every group of people there is. I think it is wrong, but it is what it is.
When I said I'd rather live in a Blue State I'm talking LEGISLATIVELY. Not because I think it's a liberal mecca or anything like that. And no, legislatively blue states are not "perfect" by any means. But I think I'm more of the mind set of NJ than say, Alaska, any day of my life. I am more conserned with children - all children - having healthcare than I am about the right to shoot wolves from helicopters. If I lived in a state that was the complete opposite of my way of thought I think it would be maddening.... that's all. So like I said before, perhaps like Sunil's Dad I DO like to live among people with similar mindsets...but that doesn't make me "racist" or "prejudice", nor do I exclude people who are differnt from me. Nor do I think having a black family move next door to me will "lower my property value." Having a crack house next door, perhaps. Having a brothel open next door, perhaps. Having a white family that hung pictures of Hitler from there windows probably wouldn't be too good for me either.
I don't mind being an idealist - I don't expect perfection of myself or others - but I think shooting for idealism will bring you higher than settling for the pathetic excuse of reality that we live in. CHANGE does not happen by thinking the status quo is impermiable.
So you don't think kids health care is important to Alaskans?? I'm sure they do..there are common bonds between all the states..health care..taxes..et al is on all our minds.. but then there are things important to Alaskans that we in NJ have no concept of and vice versa because of the different life style...would not the dreaded word diversity fit the bill here
I find it more in some areas religious racist. I never got invited to so many First Baptists Churchs during my trip to North Carolina, especially by Marshall and Hot Springs. I felt the Baptists breathing down my back all the way from Pennsicola to NC!
There are a lot of misconceptions about the "South". History is just that.... HISTORY. It is not the present. I live and work in the south. I am neither black nor white and thus a minority and do not feel uncomfortable at all. My first job was an analyst in a manufacturing facility made up of 800 southern male employees. There were only about 40 women in the facility and 80% of the men were blue collar workers to give you an idea of the atmosphere there. It was the friendliest place I had ever worked in my life. When you walked into the cafeteria, you saw some tables were all black and some were all white and some were mixed. There was never a feeling un uncomforableness or anthing of the kind.
If you know anything at all about the south, you would also know that people down here are much more religous than up north. There's a church on every corner, you will find no obscene billboards anywhere and I'd be shocked if every person you came accross didn't call you sir even if you were colored purple and orange.
I grew up in Kendall Park, NJ where once my sister went to the supermarket and parked poorly only to get shouted racial slurrs by a white man. Does this mean that all NJ is full of ignorant, racist, bigots???? No? What do you mean? But, I don't feel comfortable there. I had a bad experience. Well, get over yourself. It happens everywhere. That doesn't mean that the whole region is tainted.
Not sure if New Mexico is considered "The South" in the cultural sense, but I've experienced religious shock here in the past 3 years. Billboards everywhere, informing you to repent. Very overt. However, notably absent in the billboard game here are the Catholic churches. I am a non-practicing Catholic, and have had many issues with the church. However, I have to applaud the Catholic Church here for not succumbing to the 'billboarding' of religion here. I kind of liken it (in a weird sort of way) to the sexual bragging/locker room banter in a high school gym. The ones that were confident didn't have to 'advertise' it.
Yea but EEEPNJ if you don't think this is common your hiding in a soda can.
I don't live in a shell - but it really pisses me off. (In case you could not tell.)
Look - I'm white. My grandmother was one of the most intolerant, racist people I knew. My family was so racist they didn't know it. I remember bringing a friend home in the 4th grade and someone in my family said to me later "She is so pretty for a black girl." WTF??? In 4th grade I knew it was wrong, I just did not have the guts to tell them. I've since found my backbone and I have no problem letting people KNOW I don't like it and that I think they are ignorant.
I do not tolerate such behaviors, I don't let people say or act that way in front of me or my children. I know it exists, but it really sickens me that it does.
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