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But you only like Transplant and/or mixed looking women
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Originally Posted by Julie_inFall
Exactly, but he's allowed to have his preferences.
I like all types of women, fat, skinny, busty, curvy whatever. I Like women of all races too, hell I even approached a very very dark woman, and even dated an East African woman back in college. Transplant women are very easy to talk to and not very shunful, shallow and stuck up like native NYC women. I'm a mixed guy racially, my parents, and their parents are mixed as well. I look Hispanic or Latino to some, while others I say I look North African, while others might just assume I'm mixed black and white. I have to put in plenty of effort to pursue and make it work with native NYC women, most notably black women, and not to far behind ethnic NYC white women. Most of my connections have been with Hispanic women and to a certain degree mixed race women and after Transplant women regardless of race! So at this moment, Hispanic and mixed race women will be my primary preference, Transplant women will be a minor preference and everything else will be secondary. Whats the point of liking a particular woman and on the flipside that woman shows nothing back in return, of course I keep it moving. Maybe if I had darker skin and nappier hair, maybe I would have better luck with black women here in this city, but I do not, but still I don't give up on black women, they are great women and too fine for me not to quit on them. I don't have a main or a sol preference like you Julie! I just find that Hispanic women, and mixed race women show more interest in me than another other women, it probably might be due to physique and appearance.
But unlike a number of college educated black women with children, most educated white women still get married, therefore they get the house, car(s), savings accounts, and ample child support payments from educated white men, after the divorce. Black women in most instance simply get a houseful of children and little to no support (from the men), after the breakup.
SMH. They are plenty of great men out their in NYC, but again for many women who are highly educated, smart and hypergamist, which men can not measure up to, too even low income, ghetto hood rat single mother women who do not find no physical or emotional connection with a good man. A good man have it real hard in NYC. Actually NYC is running out of good men, when a good man goes, a good man goes and it can affect communities leaving areas distressed for years. Now you wonder why so many parts of America are stable like Denver or San Deigo? plenty of men who are family minded and take care of their own regardless of race or even class. My thing is this their are black men, white men, Hispanic and Asian who are good men and maybe willing to make a partnership with a woman regardless of what race or classs she is from. Even me for example, civic minded guy, physically active, educated, no kids, no debts, never been to jail or prison, becoming well traveled, culturally and racially diverse and so and so on. I'm a great guy on paper? It really depends on the woman and to a greater degree the society that I live in to answer that! Hell I even believe in two parent households, I hate seeing one parent households! But any way, Im all for what makes people happy. Dont really care as long as people are happy.
Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 11-04-2013 at 09:46 PM..
Whats the point of liking a particular woman and on the flipside that woman shows nothing back in return, of course I keep it moving.
I have dated white men (mostly while in college) and found it easier, because they didn't care about my dark skin. Actually, the ones that I've dated, absolutely loved it. The majority of black guys that I encounter, happen to mostly prefer light skin or caramel colored black women. I'm sure they would love to sleep with me, but I don't really see them as preferring my skin color over a mixed woman. Since many black guys have these preferences, I choose to keep it moving as well.
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Maybe if I had darker skin and nappier hair, maybe I would have better luck with black women here in this city, but I do not, but still I don't give up on black women, they are great women and too fine for me not to quit on them. I don't have a main or a sol preference like you Julie! I just find that Hispanic women, and mixed race women show more interest in me than another other women, it probably might be due to physique and appearance.
Likewise. Maybe if I had light skin and straight hair, maybe things would be different, but I do not. I haven't given up on black guys, I just choose to be around those who actually prefer my particular look. And you do have your preferences. You've made it quite clear that you prefer biracial and Hispanic women.
Why is it ok for you to acknowledge that mixed and Hispanic women prefer you, so that is who you choose to go after, but wrong for me to state that a number of white guys that I've dated in the past preferred my dark skin and kinky/curly hair, so in return, I'm more attracted to those type of guys, than those who tend to prefer the Paula Patton/Halle Berry types. Whether you realize it or not, your statements are a bit hypocritical. On the one hand you want people to understand why you have your preferences, but you refuse to acknowledge why I have mine.
Last edited by Julie_inFall; 11-04-2013 at 08:42 PM..
This is a very emotional topic for me, because I know all people should be treated as individuals. I'm just a little frustrated that men are allowed to have their preferences, while women are ostracized if we express a particular preference.
Many of the upwardly mobile black guys in NYC (that I know) are not interested in dating black women who are darker than a brown paper bag. They may never admit this, but when you look at the women who they consistently pursue and date, it clearly shows their preferences. I do not begrudge them for their preferences but I will not waste time with these guys. Some people may respond by suggesting that black women such as myself, should try "expanding our circle," by dating: working class guys, older men, or men with children, but there's no reason for me to date "down" just to date a black guy, when there's an entire city full of upwardly mobile non black men.
I haven't completely given up on black guys. Just know that if a good one comes along who really values and respects me, I'll be happy to date and marry him, but I'm not holding my breath waiting.
Technically, they don't really find the guy. What happens is, you receive emails and winks from different men, but you still have to sift through all of their profiles and determine who you should reply to.
The good thing is, match.com has a junk email box. All of the guys who fall outside of my preferences are automatically forwarded to the junk email box and I can just delete them quickly. I set my preferences to automatically exclude the following: guys who are older than 36, guys who don't have at least one profile pic, smokers, those who have children, guys who only have a high school diploma or GED, those who listed their drinking preferences as "drinks regularly," and those who have self describe body types that are obese/out of shape. I set my preferences as open to all races and I'm pretty flexible with height (since I'm petite), religion, and eye color.
I love profiles that are very well written. So far I have responded to 6 guys who reside in Manhattan and Brooklyn. I will see what happens.
Another good thing about the service is, they invite you to different "single events" throughout the city, where you get to meet other match.com members. I'm looking forward to attending an upcoming cooking event.
Maybe i'm old fashioned but that sounds like you are throwing yourself out to a pack of wolves. (Horny guys)
Me? Only how to eat it lol!! I'm Halfrican (Ghanian) on my dad's side so my cooking skills are solidly American and have no idea how to make any of the standard Ghanian/ west African dishes. Except plantains but that takes no cooking skill what so ever ha!
I would give my left arm to learn how to make pepper soup though! I've been bugging my Nigerian friend to show me. Oh, and suya. Best thing EVER! She has no idea how to make that though
I do not know how to make any African dishes. I saw a woman the other day with a full pan of Puff Puff. I asked her "is that Puff Puff"? She said yes and offered me some. I declined out of embarrassment but I really wanted some. Lol! I have not had rice and pepper soup in a long time. We had it almost everyday growing up. When my father was around, he only made African food. He loved to make this dish called Ecocorale. I am sure I spelled it wrong. It is made with Yams. He also made egusi soup with tribe. The man could really cook. We would have it with rice and plantain. I need to find a Nigerian restaurant. There is a African restaurant close by but it has more of a french influence.
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