Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Not sure if this falls into the non-romantic relationship category but I just wondered what other people would have done in my situation:
I became friends with this young lady from Nigeria and assisted her in getting a job as a law clerk at my firm. She had two young girls and a layabout for a fiance. She never seemed to have enough money for groceries, or bus fare, lunches or whatever. Apparently, she wasn't making a good personal impression around the office and people started whispering about her.
I felt sorry for her mainly because she hadn't been in this country all that long and had no family here. The gist of it is: she asked me if I could give her a small loan so that she could buy winter jackets for her two girls and said that she would pay me back in two weeks when she got paid. I knew it was her first time living in a cold climate (I still lived in Chicago at the time) and she didn't have the a proper wardrobe. I loaned her $225.00 for the little girls' sake so that they wouldn't be cold.
After the payday came and went, I began to notice that she was avoiding me. After a couple of weeks of this, I finally tracked her down and point blank asked her when she could pay me back. She sort of smirked and said, "Oh, you''ll never get that money back, sorry," and hurried away. Since then, I've tried initiating conversations with her but she steers well clear of me. I'm livid and a little hurt that someone I thought was nice and hardworking could behave so ungratefully. I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll never see that money again and I never even told my husband what happened. My question is: how would you have handled this situation?
As much as it angers you, don't even sweat it! Keep in mind that you did a good deed out of the goodness of your heart. You will be Blessed for that. And also don't be mean to her but you have to feed her with a long handle spoon.
Praline, 1st of all, I want to say that that was very nice of you to do this nice thing for that lady!
The sad thing is, you'll never know what she really used the money for.
I give people the benefit of the doubt, UNLESS, I know them to be shady, sneaky, liars, etc. If I have extra money & I am willing to help someone out, I'll really try.
But with your situation, other than suing her, which is much more trouble than it's worth, there's nothing much you can do. I know I'd NEVER loan her money again, that's for sure.
But, don't let how she was sour your feelings with others from now on. If you have another good friend, you may want to do things in a different way, such as actually meeting at the store & buying the item the person needs, but I don't think it's right to never, ever loan anyone any money ever again beacuase of how this lady was. If you have extra money again & someone's in a real bind & you want to help them, I say do it, but if they mess up ONCE, that's it. But it's up to you of couse. If you've been burned numerous times by people, I'd see why you'd never want to loan anyone any money ever again.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
