My therapist says being more social will help me...but (girlfriend, dynamics)

[Charles]

Originally Posted by bluetea3

Real life People sometimes generally don't intrests me..besides i dont know what to talk to about..and it's exhausting N akward
But deep down I want at least one friend if not to talk to do stuff with to get me out of the house..right now i dont know how to make that happen.

What do ya'll think some good ways for an anxious person to be more sociable?

Lexapro.

Maybe you don't want to be sociable because you don't want to be sociable. Nothing wrong with that. If you weren't anxious, is there any NEED to be any more sociable than you would naturally be?

[Marlow]

Home Depot, Lowe's and Michael's Arts and Crafts often have free classes on the weekends.

Also, even if one animal shelter said you needed health insurance, there may be some less structured ones in your community that need help. There are several rescue groups run by individuals in our town and they're always asking for volunteers.

Working alongside someone is often an easier way to have a conversation than sitting side face-to-face in a social setting. So you might think about volunteering somewhere that you would be doing something physical--food bank, homeless shelter, botanical garden, a teacher's classroom--someplace where your focus is necessarily in front of you, but you're still around people in a relaxed setting.

Good luck with it!

[fleetiebelle]

If you're worried about interacting with people right off the bat, maybe start off going to lectures or classes or film festivals where you don't have to make small talk, but you will be around people. Get used to putting yourself out there before you jump in with both feet.

[Litlove71]

Originally Posted by jerseygal4u

Have a little alcohol,works for me

You are a nurse, and this is your advise?

Very, VERY bad idea.

[animalcrazy]

Have you seen a professional about your anxiety issues? If you have a social anxiety disorder you may need something to take the edge off.

[JanND]

Have to tried volunteering at a senior center...or a center for mentally handicapped folks? I think you would be surprised how soon you'd feel less self-conscious around folks that would truly appreciate the company you'd bring.
Call a senior center, or a service provider for those populations and ask about volunteering.

[Jukesgrrl]

Originally Posted by JanND

Have to tried volunteering at a senior center...or a center for mentally handicapped folks? I think you would be surprised how soon you'd feel less self-conscious around folks that would truly appreciate the company you'd bring.
Call a senior center, or a service provider for those populations and ask about volunteering.

I agree with this completely. I have suffered from clinical depression most of my life and I know how easy it is to just give in to the constant desire to hibernate. But, in fact, getting out and interacting with others helps to relieve depression. Doing volunteer work is the perfect thing if you think you'll be unsure or awkward in social situations. Because the focus is not on YOU, it's on what you are DOING. And people are very appreciative, which can boost your self esteem.

Some other ideas for volunteer opportunities:

After school programs
Libraries
Homeless shelters
Museums
Red Cross or other emergency programs
Some sheriff's or police departments have volunteer opportunities
Political candidates all want free office workers
Doing behind-the-scenes work for a small theater organization
Join a choir if you can sing

Best of luck finding something that works for you. Don't give up if the first thing isn't right.

[Litlove71]

^^^+1

Summer work as an usher in an outdoor concert venue should be fairly easy to get hired for since it's seasonal. If you lived in LA I'd suggest applying to the Hollywood Bowl--it's amazing. Small arts and lectures programs would only offer you 6 hours a week, but it's a great environment!

[slowlane3]

Originally Posted by bluetea3

i dont know what to talk to about..and it's exhausting N akward

In any kind of social setting, start by saying to people "Do you come here often?" or "Are you a regular here?" "Do you volunteer anywhere else?"
"Do you think spring weather will ever get here, so we can start gardening / fishing / exercising outdoors ?" "What kind of work do you do?" Oh, I have a friend who works there; do you know him/her? What kind of education does your job require? "What hobbies do you do in your spare time?" Oh, I have a friend with that hobby. "Do you have any children/ pets? What are they like? What do your children do, or plan to do?"

Read your local newspaper cover-to-cover, and talk about issues going on in your community. Plans for developing your community - new stores, new housing. Local elections. "I hear they're having an interesting concert / play at the local theater / college. There's an interesting fair/ festival nearby. "I'm tired, since I just went hiking on the trail / bike path/ walked my dog/ painted my house / repaired my car" (whether you actually did or not, you can pretend you did).

[bluetea3]

Originally Posted by jerseygal4u

Have a little alcohol,works for me

I was thinking of alcohol but it tastes disgusting..and smoking weed but that's not for me.