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I started a new job pretty recently (6 months ago). In this new job one of my coworkers and I have really hit it off and become great friends! She's a veteran in the field (I'm 2 years post college) and has really become a trusted advisor/confidante (we'll call her friend A).
We talk all the time and both can be completely open discussing our successes/challenges/frustrations about our jobs (and life in general). While we work in the same department, we never work on the same projects together - so it's perfect that we can relate to each other's work, but never have to worry about jeopardizing a working relationship because our jobs are parallel, yet they never intersect.
I have a new partner who has come on board (I work very closely this partner DAILY). She has also begun talking to my original friend - which is great, Friend A has a wealth of knowledge that anyone new could learn a great deal from.
My concern is that as I'm sharing challenges/frustrations with my original friend, I worry that it may spill into conversations between her and the "new girl". The new girl references conversations with 'Friend A' a LOT. I don't think Friend A would intentionally disclose our private conversations, but I do have reservations. I actually find myself shying away from talk to her as much.
Should I trust 'Friend A' until she gives me a reason not to? I just see this as a bad equation and don't want to get burned when I could have avoided it...
I started a new job pretty recently (6 months ago). In this new job one of my coworkers and I have really hit it off and become great friends! She's a veteran in the field (I'm 2 years post college) and has really become a trusted advisor/confidante (we'll call her friend A).
We talk all the time and both can be completely open discussing our successes/challenges/frustrations about our jobs (and life in general). While we work in the same department, we never work on the same projects together - so it's perfect that we can relate to each other's work, but never have to worry about jeopardizing a working relationship because our jobs are parallel, yet they never intersect.
I have a new partner who has come on board (I work very closely this partner DAILY). She has also begun talking to my original friend - which is great, Friend A has a wealth of knowledge that anyone new could learn a great deal from.
My concern is that as I'm sharing challenges/frustrations with my original friend, I worry that it may spill into conversations between her and the "new girl". The new girl references conversations with 'Friend A' a LOT. I don't think Friend A would intentionally disclose our private conversations, but I do have reservations. I actually find myself shying away from talk to her as much.
Should I trust 'Friend A' until she gives me a reason not to? I just see this as a bad equation and don't want to get burned when I could have avoided it...
Call me cynical, but I wouldn't trust anyone, unless I knew them REALLY well...in personal life as well..If you are too trusting you can be easily hurt. I'd just keep my interaction with co-workers to general meaningless chitchat...to be polite...The MAIN thing is don't talk about one co-worker with another...that's a no no and pretty risky stuff.
I would definitely not complain to friend A about new co-worker or anything that could be construed as talking behind her back. I also would not discuss info at work that could be considered gossip about myself or other co-workers. Someday she may be closer to new person than to you and reveal your conversations. If you become true friends outside of work, then I would be more candid, but still use discretion speaking about people she knows, unless you know that you are on the same page.
Never tell any coworker anything you don't want to be shared with other coworkers.
This is the best advice that you could get. You never know what can change the dynamics at work and you do not want to be embroiled in anything that could hurt you or your career.
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