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I mean...I draw from a very small family, no siblings, just me, my mom and dad and grandma. However when there was a holiday we all stuck together, made a nice dinner and chatted up etc NO DRAMA.
Now I am married, I no longer have either my dad or grandma, and my husband's family is horrendous! His parents are divorced and neither one is better than the other. Luckily one of them lives 1600 miles away so we don't have to worry about it. The other side comes over for Thanksgiving every year (their yearly visit to us), and instead of enjoying our company, they come to b*tch about whatever crap, play on Facebook while they blow my TV loud as hell, and tell my kids what to do in their own house! WTF!
My husband and his dad spend time fixing crap around their cars! then clean my car and then complain they cleaned it all though I didn't ask them to clean it. (I am not going to be made to feel guilty for other people's choices!) My car WAS clean...Then they expect to be praised for 4 days for doing it!? WTF...r u kidding me? My husband acts like a complete jerk to me every time they come, and starts unwarranted fights out of nothing. Then FIL starts to pick on me, my kids, and starts RENAMING my kids...to the point where my almost 4 year old comes to me with: "why is grandpa trying to change my name", or "why is grandpa calling me this?" seriously? Now he's reading Facebook QUOTES! I hate Facebook mainly because people just won't freakin stop with these non sense quotes and farmville crap! (I am very social, just not on social media because I like to socialize with real people and not alone like an idiot in front of a computer screen!!!) He starts drinking, and gets half hammered and the crap that comes out is worthy of Jerry Springer! OMG...and I was raised by the outmost gentleman, who had the outmost respect for people, and women, who would never get drunk and be proud of it.
Then the lying...they wanted to go meet someone else in a different town, couldn't meet them in the am, and said: "later"....well, "later" can be 4pm, 6pm, any of those...it was 9pm...after we were all deliriously tired after walking through a theme park...why is there no communication? I could have taken the kids home...rather than drag them like zombies and sit around and wait that late! Then on our way home, it's 11pm now, let's stop at McDonalds to get something to eat...that took 35 minutes!!!! Why do they call it fast food again? I forget...
Not to mention all the comments, and antics in between...why come, if your only purpose is making others miserable? They put the Tv loud as it can be when we're trying to go to bed. Our bedroom is right of the living room, so no buffer. We have head set, but nooo...If I got 4 hours of sound sleep in the last 4 days that's too much!
I am going to give my "Thanks" after they're gone...Oh yeah, and BTW you CANNOT say (off Facebook quotes of course): "Ohh you'll miss them when they're gone"....because:
1. When they were here, you were playing on Facebook, and you were to busy to pay attention to anyone
2. And you were being a complete jerk to everybody; I won't ever miss a JERK.
I am sorry, but I am so done right now...this was the weekend from hell again...never changes...
In your shoes I might try a divide and conquer approach. plan an outing with your own kids while the men are cleaning out the car. Get them out of the house on your own agenda instead of being ruled by them. Yep, they will have trouble adjusting, but you do get to be in charge of your own kids.
Plan some time for the kids to be out of the house without you...send them to the movies with a friend, or something.
Go to church to get away from them all. Take the kids or don't take the kids, but no one can argue with you for going to church. They might complain that they didn't get to spend enough time with the kids, then tell them you thought they might appreciate a break from all the commotion,
Break the TV before they get there. I'm not joking...detach the cable, or better yet, take the router to the cable company, tell your family it is in the shop and you are getting a new one on monday.
I feel your pain. It is hard to get used to inlaws, esp when your spouse puts their needs ahead of yours.
In your shoes I might try a divide and conquer approach. plan an outing with your own kids while the men are cleaning out the car. Get them out of the house on your own agenda instead of being ruled by them. Yep, they will have trouble adjusting, but you do get to be in charge of your own kids.
Plan some time for the kids to be out of the house without you...send them to the movies with a friend, or something.
Go to church to get away from them all. Take the kids or don't take the kids, but no one can argue with you for going to church. They might complain that they didn't get to spend enough time with the kids, then tell them you thought they might appreciate a break from all the commotion,
Break the TV before they get there. I'm not joking...detach the cable, or better yet, take the router to the cable company, tell your family it is in the shop and you are getting a new one on monday.
I feel your pain. It is hard to get used to inlaws, esp when your spouse puts their needs ahead of yours.
I did! Yesterday I took two of the kids to the park because they were not going to go for the "boredwalk" thing they wanted to do... and they were supposed to be "done" meeting these other people, meet and go home at a decent hour! If I knew that they were waiting around on these people I would have taken the other car and go home. Believe me, this won't repeat itself. Its 2 cars from now on. No common sense. When I told hubby that I was taking the kids to have fun, he freaked out and started yelling at me, only to come back and text me after: "Good idea taking them out, cause they wouldn't have done well with this"!
Kids are under 9, I don't have anyone to send them out with...I wish. I did take two of them with me shopping Friday (which I never ever do, as I don't go shopping on Black Friday), but I took them out because this is not good behavior for them to be around.
They have zero interest in spending time with the kids. FIL brushes them off, and yells at them...no bond, nothing of that sort. Two of his own kids won't talk to him. Last year they had us come from Christmas to their other home in NC, only for us to be stuck in the house for 5 days listening to him yelling at them not to touch anything! Told hubby in no way in hell this would happen again, and disrupt our Christmas.
Just now: "I want waffles with butter"...no "may I please", nothing...
You have yourself to blame if you let people put your TV on and lecture your kids.
How's that? There's no way to tell this guy to shut the damn TV off! My husband has an issue "asking"! This is the kind of BULLY that you "don't tell what to do to"! Conversations are monologues! You can't even intervene...I was so annoyed with him trying to rename my kids you have no idea!
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