Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,706 posts, read 41,859,060 times
Reputation: 41429
Advertisements
If you think I would send a thank you for a gift I made clear I didn't want in the first place but you sent despite my words on the matter, you are kidding me.
If you think I would send a thank you for a gift I made clear I didn't want in the first place but you sent despite my words on the matter, you are kidding me.
You're entirely missing the point. That person thought enough of you to give you something. What it was is really immaterial.
If you think I would send a thank you for a gift I made clear I didn't want in the first place but you sent despite my words on the matter, you are kidding me.
I may not have been clear. What folks didn't want was a jar of loose rocks. I had turned the nicest ones into jewelry and what I sent was the jewelry.
I agree, if they'd said they didn't want the rocks and I'd sent them the rocks, that would have been dumb.
Wow this one is beyond bad manners. I'm so sorry you experienced this. I'd call them on it, but in a confusion way. "Did you get my package?"
I had thought about that. I keep feeling like if I did, I'd be fishing for a thank you which feels like rude behavior following rude behavior, if that makes any sense.
That happened to me once when a friend's mother died. I'd sent flowers to her house. About a week later, when talking to her husband, I'd casually asked if they got the flowers. I didn't want a thank you--obviously the woman's mother died and she had more on her mind. I was primarily checking up on the florist to make sure they were delivered, and thought the husband could confirm for me without bothering his wife. Well, he confirmed they came, then chastised his wife for not thanking me. Then she sent a note apologizing and thanking me. I felt really bad. That's NOT how I wanted that to go because I felt like I made her mom's death about me. Ever since then, I've been reluctant to play the "Did you get the gift" angle. I know this is a WAY different situation, but still...old wounds....
I don't get it either. They can at least say, "Thanks" on Facebook. At least acknowledge the fact that they got the gift. A lot of people are like this (don't even acknowledge that they received something from you). It's weird.
A thank you note is always appropriate. I send a hand-written one, even if the gift is donated or trashed.
However, in your case, I could see why you did not receive many!
The family did NOT want the polished stones, for whatever reason. And then there you went, sending them the darn stones that they passed on.
And to boot, you made them into trinkets that they do not want.
Maybe they are thinking it is better to say nothing at all, then to remind you they did not even want the stones in the first place.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter
If you think I would send a thank you for a gift I made clear I didn't want in the first place but you sent despite my words on the matter, you are kidding me.
Pitt, I rarely disagree with you, but I do in this case, along with Dissenter.
Even if they didn't want the stones in or out of a setting, the right thing to do is to acknowledge the sentiment behind it. After that, they are free to do whatever they want with the gift.
It sounds as though the OP made quite an effort to share her talents along with her grandfather's collection.
I would have been touched to receive it, but even if it wasn't to my taste, I would have made my gratitude known.
One of the things I wonder is if people put off saying thank you because they think they need to make it a big deal. I mean, to me, all I would have wanted was a Facebook post saying, "Got the package. The necklace is cool, thanks!" I genuinely would not have been disappointed with that. But maybe people think they're supposed to say more, and put it off because they don't know what to say.
Pitt, I rarely disagree with you, but I do in this case, along with Dissenter.
Even if they didn't want the stones in or out of a setting, the right thing to do is to acknowledge the sentiment behind it. After that, they are free to do whatever they want with the gift.
Ah... but you DO agree with me as I said:
"A thank you note is always appropriate. I send a hand-written one, even if the gift is donated or trashed."
That was a thoughtful thing to do, OP. Sorry it was not appreciated. Nice memento of your grandfather.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
