Would you ever forgive your friend for cheating on the man you had planned to marry? (jealous, business)
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Some time ago, I got heavily involved with a childhood friend of mine and her relationship that ended in me cheating with her ex-fiancee. Fast foward 4 years later, I still wish I could take it all back. I admitted my wrongdoings and deeply regret doing what I did.
She only talks to me briefly if we happen to run into each other. Rarely, she will answer my texts.
I don't talk on phone.
I mailed her a Valentine's Day card last week.... Not even a response.
She has blocked blocked me on FB. Although shes "friends" with members of my own family which stings and hurts.
Really? A Valentine Card? BAD idea!
I would forgive you, then have nothing to do with you ever.
Before I had reunited with this childhood friend, I was in hermit mode for years and years only interacting with people at work, my parents and siblings. At the time. I rarely had a drop of alcohol at that point, never smoked and was still a virgin. By then I was probably 26-27. I grew up in a family that showed very little affection. Even my parents rarely showed each other affection. My friend n her family on the other hand show each other affection and huggy type family
Not trying to making excuses, I just wish she would see where I'm coming from. When I started to come out of my shell, it resulted in disaster as I've mentioned. All these feelings that I've bottled up and avoided over the years made me a mess of myself.
That time when I began being her friend again, I had started drinking and smoking. She drank heavily and smoked as well. So did her ex. Her ex and his former best friend would get together on the weekends and smoke dope. me and the ex's former best friend clashed which caused problems as well.
So when that all blew over few years later and their relationship ended, it was tough. Although I was still seeing her ex occasionally, she has barely spoken to me since. It had made me make some changes in my life including seeing a therapist. Its better but still feel that void and feel bad now for what I did. The friends I associate with now either dont drink or just 2-3 drinks.
So?
She isn't obligated to forgive you, to give you friendship and to make you feel better about yourself. You have no right to dictate whether she can be friendly towards your family.
I dont think she'll whip out a gun at me. She's not that kind of person. I don't see how the Judge iwould approve a restraining order on sending her a few texts and a card. I never threatened her and never will. You're missing the point, I know I betrayed her trust but it hurts me to see that shes friends with members of my family
YOU are missing the point. Yeah, you betrayed her trust - big time. Which do you think hurt worse - you seeing her still be friends with your family, or you sleeping with her husband?
Get over it and move on. Do NOT contact her.
You sent her a V-Day card? Seriously? Talk about pouring lemon juice and salt into a wound. May as well pour some rubbing alcohol on that wound, too.
Stop contacting her. Leave her alone. Delete her info from your phone. Move on.
Not many on this thread from the sixties, I take it
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck
However, one should always make these decisions with the correct facts. I am no longer friends with my former best friend, because she thinks her husband at the time, slept with me. Which never happened. Not even a little minor incident. I declined his passes at me each and every time he tried something. They divorced and she is now with my ex husband.
Same happened to me. John thought I was sleeping with his wife, and didn't find out I didn't until he slept with my "hex" and she told him no!! Hey, it was the seventies, aftermath of the sixties. Who cares? I sounds like this thread is full of answers from the bible belt. Relax. It's just sex. Chill.
YOU are missing the point. Yeah, you betrayed her trust - big time. Which do you think hurt worse - you seeing her still be friends with your family, or you sleeping with her husband?
Get over it and move on. Do NOT contact her.
You sent her a V-Day card? Seriously? Talk about pouring lemon juice and salt into a wound. May as well pour some rubbing alcohol on that wound, too.
Stop contacting her. Leave her alone. Delete her info from your phone. Move on.
it was her financee, not her husband. I no longer sleep with him.
Same happened to me. John thought I was sleeping with his wife, and didn't find out I didn't until he slept with my "hex" and she told him no!! Hey, it was the seventies, aftermath of the sixties. Who cares? I sounds like this thread is full of answers from the bible belt. Relax. It's just sex. Chill.
I remember she said in another thread when she talked about this, she apparently continued to "date" him after this whole thing blew up and only dumped him because his drugs problems became too much for her to handle. It is clearly not just sex. Just a huge mess.
I remember she said in another thread when she talked about this, she apparently continued to "date" him after this whole thing blew up and only dumped him because his drugs problems became too much for her to handle. It is clearly not just sex. Just a huge mess.
yes. you are right. His drug problem spiraled out of control and too blind to see it at first.
Some time ago, I got heavily involved with a childhood friend of mine and her relationship that ended in me cheating with her ex-fiancee. Fast foward 4 years later, I still wish I could take it all back. I admitted my wrongdoings and deeply regret doing what I did.
She only talks to me briefly if we happen to run into each other. Rarely, she will answer my texts. I don't talk on phone.
I mailed her a Valentine's Day card last week.... Not even a response.
She has blocked blocked me on FB. Although shes "friends" with members of my own family which stings and hurts.
The whole irony of this is he had also cheated on her with her sister. And her and the sister are still friends talking to each other
Why? And if it's just because you don't like to, that's leads to problems in relationships, whether you want to believe it or not. Phone/IRL encounters with people help keep them close to you. As an aside, I find it interesting how easily people will throw away people they claim are their friends. They get upset or annoyed with them over big or small things, and POOF! they're no longer friends. I always believed friends are your friends no matter what. Now they are discarded as quickly as a used up outfit. Sure, OP did the wrong thing, but guess what? The friend's fiancee is the EX-fiancee, and if there's anyone the friend should never forgive, it's the former fiancee. Fortunately the friend was smart and didn't marry the guy thinking she could reform him. That's why I said that the friendship should be salvaged if boundaries were set up and respected.
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