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It seems some people either are against making friends with the people they work with or they just never saw it as an option.
Why is that?
Please elaborate!!!
In my 20's, I always made friends with people I worked with "because" they were the one's I saw the most. My husband thinks the opposite, and after meeting some of the people he works with, there's no way in hell I'd want to be friends with them.
I think it really depends on your age, and what you have in common with these people + your schedule after work. I am not one to "look" for friends, so if I happen to work with people I have things in common with, and I have time after work, then I will attempt to make friends with them, if not, then I keep to myself, get my work done and go home. I have plenty of things to do to keep me entertained (doing fun things with my kids) without needing a group of friends around! I don't want/need "friends" just so I can say I have them. If they don't bring anything of quality to my life, I don't need them. "Going out drinking" does not bring anything of value or entertainment to my life, and most mom's I've meet seem to just want to do that...I rather watch a sunset, or take a walk on a nice boardwalk..
I've never made friends with co-workers, and never will. Many of the people I work with are opportunistic, two-faced back-stabbers. I also want to separate my personal life from my work life.
If you make friends with co-workers, you'll regret it - believe me!!!!!! It could end up costing you your reputation at work, or worse.
I don't get the whole I spend 8 hours a day with them so why anymore thing. That's pretty dumb. You could say the same thing about being married or havin kids. Thats just an excuse
Itd be a happier work place if ppl did make friends with each other.
It makes things awkward if one of the "friends" gets promoted..
It happens all the time.. Then you have to maybe discipline, demote, fire, your friend...
Who will expect certain special treatment, you are after all "friends"
I don't get the whole I spend 8 hours a day with them so why anymore thing. That's pretty dumb. You could say the same thing about being married or havin kids. Thats just an excuse
Itd be a happier work place if ppl did make friends with each other.
That makes no sense at all. I dont choose the people I have to spend my work time with, they are chosen by someone else to fill a roll.
I choose my SO, chosen because I want to spend the time with them. Totally different.
Yes, Ive made a few acquaintenances from work, but by the time the day is done, the last thing I want to do is spend more time with them. Im ready for "me time".
Me, too. I have two ladies I'm still friends with after 20 years and the company is now defunct. Nevertheless, we still meet up for "Board Meetings" (happy hour) whenever we get the chance.
Quote:
Originally Posted by upsadaisy
I don't get the whole I spend 8 hours a day with them so why anymore thing. That's pretty dumb. You could say the same thing about being married or havin kids. Thats just an excuse
Itd be a happier work place if ppl did make friends with each other.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Linda_d
Exactly this. Like anywhere else, people in your workplace can be real jerks ... or great people ... or people you become good friends with. If you move around the country for your work, oftentimes, the only people you have to socialize with at first are your co-workers ... and sometimes those co-workers become friends.
^^^likewise. Sure I made friends. Did they all last if either one of us left the job or company - no.
Let's say it gave us the chance to vent and discuss situations and solutions that could be improved
and it was nice going out afterwards (once in a while) for laughs.
It seems some people either are against making friends with the people they work with or they just never saw it as an option.
Why is that?
I got into construction late in life; no friends there; different lifestyle.
My beer, peelers, and pot days were when I was in my twenties.
Plus where they go.......no women.
If you're in a dot.com with similar goals or a sales organization it's highly social. That's a different game.
I think you would have to be the village idiot to not cultivate some kind of friendly relationship with your colleagues.
First, work friends are not the same are your friends outside the office. At the same time, you do work with them and have a great deal in common.
Second, work friendships can grow into the real thing over time. Some of my best friends are people I used to work with, even though we haven't worked together for twenty years.
Third, people do business with people. If you are a self-centered, sociopathic nitwit who doesn't talk to anyone, then don't complain when others get plum assignments, promotions, or raises. Like it or not, work is a team sport. And I've never met anyone so brilliant that their horrid people skills were overlooked.
Here's the thing. If you think that everybody at work are a bunch of backstabbers, if you think every job you've ever had was a den of lying manipulative cheats or ninnies, then that says a great deal more about you than it does about them. Seek help.
I got into construction late in life; no friends there; different lifestyle.
My beer, peelers, and pot days were when I was in my twenties.
Plus where they go.......no women.
If you're in a dot.com with similar goals or a sales organization it's highly social. That's a different game.
I think that shared interests and compatible temperaments are more important than where you meet people you end up friends with. With co-workers, it might be that nobody shares your interests or maybe that several do. I just think that making it a "rule" or not even considering becoming friends with co-workers because you're worried about office politics just seems a good way to end up without many friends at all since most of our friends, especially in this day and age when people move frequently and often good distances, won't be decades-long pals and may only eventually become FB type "friends".
I think you would have to be the village idiot to not cultivate some kind of friendly relationship with your colleagues.
First, work friends are not the same are your friends outside the office. At the same time, you do work with them and have a great deal in common.
Second, work friendships can grow into the real thing over time. Some of my best friends are people I used to work with, even though we haven't worked together for twenty years.
Third, people do business with people. If you are a self-centered, sociopathic nitwit who doesn't talk to anyone, then don't complain when others get plum assignments, promotions, or raises. Like it or not, work is a team sport. And I've never met anyone so brilliant that their horrid people skills were overlooked.
Here's the thing. If you think that everybody at work are a bunch of backstabbers, if you think every job you've ever had was a den of lying manipulative cheats or ninnies, then that says a great deal more about you than it does about them. Seek help.
Truth. People say "I want to avoid any drama at work" and "I'm not here to make friends" and "I do my work, go home and I don't want to see them afterwards" and their 500 reasons (excuses) under the sun. That's drama, too. The kind they bring on themselves.
Truth. People say "I want to avoid any drama at work" and "I'm not here to make friends" and "I do my work, go home and I don't want to see them afterwards" and their 500 reasons (excuses) under the sun. That's drama, too. The kind they bring on themselves.
These are always the same people who complain about being screwed out of a promotion at work because of 'politics,' as if the art of getting along with other people is morally dubious.
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Depends on age/industry/goals
