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and once I have those I won't be able to have friends because I'll be so consumed. I can have acquaintances
wow, this again? I am married and have been for a long time, and let me tell you, my husband and I are close, and I love my child, but friends are just as important. you aren't ever going to find someone with this attitude, no one wants someone who is this obsessed with them, with babies, with settling down asap no matter what. My husband would NEVER have been with me if I had uttered these words, like ever. Part of what he likes about me is that I have friends and hobbies and a life outside of him. You really need to tone it down. As far as your post, you should really learn how to be happy for other people. I don't think you are capable of being a good friend actually, which is really sad. Because you know what, even if you do find a husband and have kids, you will eventually wish you had friends to talk to and see, and there will be no one around. And what if your husband has his own friends, and wants to keep them and see then, without you around all the time? You really need to grow up and seek counselling. You posted a while back about an army guy or something that you were sure would be with you, I am assuming that went like everyone said it would go, a total disaster. I don't think you realize what a turn off your attitude is to potential boyfriends, who may actually like you at first, but then realize how desperate and needy you are and will run. I have dated guys like you, and I ran. I also think you have no clue the reality of marriage and motherhood, it's not all roses. I think you are more interested in the show of it all so you can say "hey look at me, I am married, someone wanted me" Let me tell you, being married means nothing about your worth as a person, I know some horrible people who are married, they aren't good people or special just because they found someone to put up with them.
Last edited by canadiangirl_2015; 02-29-2016 at 09:15 AM..
I am not going and telling men on the first date to get me pregnant but at 25 come on I'm ready I have accomplished everything in life already except that
At 25, you have accomplished absolutely nothing! You've only lived a quarter, maybe a third of your life! I don't know anyone who accomplished everything in life by the time they were 25! Not a soul. Can you imagine if someone who has been president say Oh I've done everything already! Um nope they didn't. They couldn't even be president until they were 35!
I pity any man who comes into your life. There's clearly a reason they've all RUN like they were on fire! You make post after post of needing to be married and pregnant. No one needs to be married or pregnant!
Seriously, get some MAJOR therapy....the kind that takes years. Your future husband and children will thank you for it. Your obsession is not normal nor is it healthy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gab12
We are both kind of immature not gonna lie and Masters in social work
SERIOUSLY??? What kind of work will you be doing?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gab12
Do you think a lot of people feel like that? I mean realistically have you ever met people who wish they didn't get married or start a family (assuming they aren't in an abusive relationship)? Maybe there are people like that? I don't know, I could end up being one of those people I assume, or I could just be a happy wife and mom.
All. The. Time. I know so many people who wish they could have a do over. So many wish they didn't marry that person. Wish they waited to have kids. Wish they had fewer kids.
I also know many people who have ZERO interest in marriage and others who have ZERO interest in having children. Everyone isn't marriage/baby obsessed. Most people aren't.
Call me when you're 42 and your biological clock is SCREAMING. At 25, it's on snooze.
With your desperate need for a man in your life I have to ask, did you grow up with a dad in your day to day life? You sound like you're seeking approval from a man like someone who didn't grow up with a dad. Did you have a messed up childhood and are desperate to make a new one?
I can honestly telly you that every guy I seriously dated, I wasn't looking for! When I met my husband, I was NOT at all interested in dating anyone. He pursued me and I kept blowing him off. I was NOT interested. And I've been married for 19 years. When you're not looking is when it WILL happen.
and once I have those I won't be able to have friends because I'll be so consumed. I can have acquaintances
wow, this again? I am married and have been for a long time, and let me tell you, my husband and I are close, and I love my child, but friends are just as important. you aren't ever going to find someone with this attitude, no one wants someone who is this obsessed with them, with babies, with settling down asap no matter what. My husband would NEVER have been with me if I had uttered these words, like ever. Part of what he likes about me is that I have friends and hobbies and a life outside of him. You really need to tone it down. As far as your post, you should really learn how to be happy for other people. I don't think you are capable of being a good friend actually, which is really sad. Because you know what, even if you do find a husband and have kids, you will eventually wish you had friends to talk to and see, and there will be no one around. And what if your husband has his own friends, and wants to keep them and see then, without you around all the time? You really need to grow up and seek counselling. You posted a while back about an army guy or something that you were sure would be with you, I am assuming that went like everyone said it would go, a total disaster. I don't think you realize what a turn off your attitude is to potential boyfriends, who may actually like you at first, but then realize how desperate and needy you are and will run. I have dated guys like you, and I ran. I also think you have no clue the reality of marriage and motherhood, it's not all roses. I think you are more interested in the show of it all so you can say "hey look at me, I am married, someone wanted me" Let me tell you, being married means nothing about your worth as a person, I know some horrible people who are married, they aren't good people or special just because they found someone to put up with them.
The marine is still away, we will see how it is when he is here. I haven't fully closed that door but I am not waiting either. The thing is obviously someone liked those people enough to be with them. I don't dislike this pregnant girl as a person I just choose to not interact with her. I am indifferent towards her, I don't like or dislike her she just exists.
At 25, you have accomplished absolutely nothing! You've only lived a quarter, maybe a third of your life! I don't know anyone who accomplished everything in life by the time they were 25! Not a soul. Can you imagine if someone who has been president say Oh I've done everything already! Um nope they didn't. They couldn't even be president until they were 35!
I pity any man who comes into your life. There's clearly a reason they've all RUN like they were on fire! You make post after post of needing to be married and pregnant. No one needs to be married or pregnant!
Seriously, get some MAJOR therapy....the kind that takes years. Your future husband and children will thank you for it. Your obsession is not normal nor is it healthy.
SERIOUSLY??? What kind of work will you be doing?
All. The. Time. I know so many people who wish they could have a do over. So many wish they didn't marry that person. Wish they waited to have kids. Wish they had fewer kids.
I also know many people who have ZERO interest in marriage and others who have ZERO interest in having children. Everyone isn't marriage/baby obsessed. Most people aren't.
Call me when you're 42 and your biological clock is SCREAMING. At 25, it's on snooze.
With your desperate need for a man in your life I have to ask, did you grow up with a dad in your day to day life? You sound like you're seeking approval from a man like someone who didn't grow up with a dad. Did you have a messed up childhood and are desperate to make a new one?
I can honestly telly you that every guy I seriously dated, I wasn't looking for! When I met my husband, I was NOT at all interested in dating anyone. He pursued me and I kept blowing him off. I was NOT interested. And I've been married for 19 years. When you're not looking is when it WILL happen.
I have a dad who has been around through my whole life and married to my mom for 30 years, and spent 4 years married before considering kids (they were in their 30s when they had us). Thats great but I don't want to be an old parent, I don't want to watch my friends be all happy and married and me be sad and unmarried with nothing to show for life. I think that marriage and babies are accomplishments and I want to accomplish that. I already have the education and stuff, I covered that already now it is time to become a wife and mommy.
I do go to therapy we work on self esteem, I don't have years to do therapy but I can do it for now. I mean ok, I do have the time for therapy, but I mean I don't have the ability to do it for years, I want a husband. An example, my therapist wants me to not online date at all for a while... I can't do that. I am wasting time if I am not putting myself out there to potentially be with someone.
The marine is still away, we will see how it is when he is here. I haven't fully closed that door but I am not waiting either. The thing is obviously someone liked those people enough to be with them. I don't dislike this pregnant girl as a person I just choose to not interact with her. I am indifferent towards her, I don't like or dislike her she just exists.
OP, I don't think you will ever fully get it. Being married means NOTHING. Don't you see that? It doesn't mean you are better or worse than anyone else you are just married. Some married people are happy, some aren't. But your words speak volumes " someone liked then enough to be with them? Who cares? You are a prime candidate for abuse and a guy who is terrible, because as long as someone wants you, you will be with them. It's just really weird. And I didn't have my son till my 30's, and I don't consider myself an old mom. Want to know what I did when I was your age? Had fun, travelled, got an education, became involved with animal rescue ( which I still do), and just lived my life. You want to know what I do now? Much of the same!!!! Except now I have a husband and a child, but I am still me, still have interests and still travel with my girlfriends and still enjoy life. My husband is not my entire reason for being, and my child is growing up, it's my job as a parent to let him, and not cling to him. I suspect once you have kids, you will put so much focus on the kids to make you happy, and forget your job as a parent is to let them go and prepare them for that..
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