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she can get a part time job and earn the money for it if she really "needs" it.
This exactly. Teens can be bratty about stuff, but they need to learn to deal with disappointment. Life isn't fair. The sooner they learn this, the better. There are many adults who haven't learned this.
I would simply tell her: my budget for a phone is XYZ. Let's look together and see what we can get at ATT/Verizon/Whatever for that. If you really have your heart set on the new iPhone, you can get a job and save up for whatever the dollar amount is over the XYZ budget.
Period. DONE. That's all.
I have 4 kids and none of them have a new iPhone. I want a new iPhone, and even though I can afford it, refuse to pay almost $1000 for a damned PHONE.
I do agree with you. That was incredibly amiss on my part, but the mindset behind it was that during the course of those 3 years I'd save up and get enough money together to get her the cell phone, but sadly confounding variables I hadn't anticipated got in the way and I had to use up a lot of my savings to take care of the unexpected family situation that occurred.
.
At 16 your daughter is old enough to understand this. Express that you are frustrated, too. If she's a good daughter, she will compromise and be understanding that while you had the best intentions, sometimes life gets in the way.
In the late 60s, my brother said he HAD to have a new Jeep for his 16th birthday. All his friends were getting a car on their 16th. He knew better than to throw a fit about wanting one. If he had thrown a fit around our dad, even at 16, by the time our dad had finished with him, he wouldn't have felt like sitting on any thing for several days without lots of padding. My brother opened his gift from my dad to find a plastic Jeep from the Dime Store. Dad told him right there if he heard one more word about what he HAD to have, he wouldn't enjoy the results. We were taught to know better that to say we HAD to have something.
Hey Dad, your responsibilities as a father don't include going into debt to satisfy your daughter. And, while it's understandable that she will be disappointed, it will benefit her down the road to learn that income only stretches so far, and one must live within one's means.
BUT, don't wait until Christmas morning to break the news. Invite her to breakfast, lunch or even dinner this week, just the two of you, and tell her then. You made a promise you cannot fulfill, and you regret it. Assure her you'd give her the moon and stars if you could, but it isn't possible. At 16, it isn't unreasonable for her to hear the reality of adult expenses.
I guess the lesson here is to not promise gifts you can't afford. You've been promising for three years. Your credibility is going to go way down when she finds out you have lied to her.
Are any of the cell companies offering it as an enticement to sign up?
The previous generation ones should be cheap now that there is a new version out. Try looking into that possibility. At least that is close to what you promised. You can alays claim your promise 3 years ago was for the version out 3 years ago, not the new version in 2017..
I don't think a teenager needs the latest most expensive phone, but then I wouldn't have promised one. I'd rather say no and take the disappointment right when they first ask instead of trying to stall a kid off with an empty promise.
This a thousand times. Whenever a kid asks for a luxury & I consider a 950 phone a luxury, the best thing is to say look you get a job save up1/2 and I'll buy the other 1/2. Next time do that.
But you promised not once but many times....empty promises absolutely suck.
What good is your word?
Your cell provider can sell you the phone & you can pay for it with some handy dandy payment plan, so it doesn't bite all at once. Or get a new crefit card with introductory O% interest rate for 1st year and charge it and pay it over the year.
iphone 7 available through most carriers for $549 or no interest $23 a month for two years. If the kid's not happy unless she gets the thousand dollar phone that's her problem, and her parents' too for raising her to have unreasonable expectations. He promised her an iphone, this is the easiest way to do it.
$950? Is that the X? If so, it's the most expensive iPhone and the very latest and greatest. Get her a 7 or 7s, whatever oldest model it is that they're still selling. It's a few generations old now and has got to be cheaper than $950, even without an upgrade with your carrier.
About a year ago, I bought a "certified refurbished" iPhone 5S for $239 online at Best Buy. It's been just fine for my needs. Deals are out there, if you're willing to accept refurbished.
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