How to decide to move away

[Blondebaerde]

Skipped to last few paragraphs...

How does one move away? When I did it, I had a STEM degree where there was tons of both local and national work. I made outreaches and had internships. I prepped up to have every entry level (professional) skill needed, covered. And, it mostly worked out. I have work first week, then FTE three weeks after. I had to move away, or to be clear "chose to" move away, like you. I was 22. Salary was about $42K, in 2019 dollars. That was okay for 22, I lived in a working man part of town and vaulted myself up year over year until turning 30 and leaving town again, that time for $100K in today's dollars.

My view is start roadmapping out that which you do well, that others don't, in a skill set that won't self-evidently become obsolete next twenty years. U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics is a gold mine, pretty obviously, on megatrends.

Might have to leverage yourself to gain the right skills. Or not, depends what you're good at. If anything valuable. I was a computer nerd, from the day I was born (so to speak) in disposition. Obviously inherently a valuable skill. I honed it via STEM work into that that others do NOT do (= scarcity of labor).

After that, need to reinvent yourself about every five years. That's how long it takes for the paradigm to radically change, each time, in my line of work anyway. It took me seven year to figure that out, post undergrad.

If you're "scared," you've already failed. Might want to research what "courage" means in the face of adversity or hardship. Can't overcome, forget it. My courage was about not fear of failure, but assumption of success. I've consistently made two steps forward, and one hard step back, throughout my career. Few careers are all-win. Few are all-lose, except a friend of mine who dealt himself out of the game years ago and became a house husband. That was his way of coping.

What did I do to make it easier? I didn't want to stay in SE Michigan. Almost anywhere in "the West," call it west of Kansas City (by convention) was tons more interesting...to me. To live there (here) I needed to work. So, work I did, for years. Not to be confused with toiling, which is stupid.

When you figure out how interesting California is, too, you may want to live there a couple years. I did, for seven. No regrets, it's a real trippy experience. Lots more anarchy than most are used to.

I wouldn't show up without a job, if possible, though that's squishy these days. Turn it into a research project. Getting away from a "family" I didn't like very much was half my motivation, just drive off. They'll take you back if it doesn't work.

Or, be a failure to launch and ask the same questions when you're 35. That's on the edge of too late, but whatever.

[blueherons]

Get a job with a company you can transfer with.

Warehouse job? Find something with BJs, Sams, Costco, or Amazon.

Also, get a part time restaurant job. That's the best way to have an immediate social circle and to make a living wage.

You should definitely leave your area.

[meo92953]

One young woman I knew started working at Wal-Mart when she was in high school and transferred to another store in a different city when she wanted to move there after she graduated.

I, myself, took an awful job at a potato chip factory because it was afternoons and I could then interview at other places during the day. It took three months to find the right job but it worked out in the end.

It was a city my brother lived in though and I was able to stay with him until I got my first check and then got my own apartment.

Another time I wanted to try out a different city but, I was older and saved up the required three month living expenses. I worked as a temp, which kept me afloat, but couldn't find a permanent job.

My sister, who lived in Sacramento at the time, offered for me to stay with her, so I did that and eventually found a job in San Francisco. I was there for a beautiful three years before I was asked to move home as my mother needed help.

Things were changing where I worked with new management coming on board and people were being laid off so I agreed to move back home. I actually got my old job back once my mom's health crisis was over, so everything worked out well.

I'll never regret those years and am glad I did it before it got bad there. But San Francisco is no place to be if you don't have job security, even back then. I'm sure it's much worse now.

I guess the whole point is, you never know what's out there until you take a chance. Be frugal, save up enough to at least survive and just go. Hold enough back to make sure you can get back home if you have to. That will be your emergency fund.