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I am 31 year old single mom with 8 and 9 year old boys. We currently live in Appleton, WI - approx 68,000 people. I love the city we live in (the schools are great, it's extremely safe, cheap, my commute to work is only 7 minutes). I am just sick of the cold, ice and snow! It was -47 below for a whole week and we are supposed to get another 12 inches of snow this weekend. I want to move somewhere warmer with a much milder climate!
I have looked at several cities in SC, but was told that SC would not be the best place for me since I am white and my boys are bi-racial. I was told everything from there are still plenty of KKK stores on mainstreet to the fact that bi-racial children and black children are ostrisized (spelling). And that it's not in my or their best interest to live in a state that still freely flies the confederate flag.
I was told beware of 'blackstabbers' & that Northerners are not welcome at all. I was also told that many people are still fighting the 'war'. Call me naive or whatever you wish; but I truly was shocked by this. I live a predomiantly white city and my boys have never been treated poorly or treated differently than their white friends. The school they go to is very diverse; many mexican migrant workers, a few russian students, many asian students, white students, and only a small number of black or biracial students. Don't get me wrong, I have experienced racism here while I have been in smaller towns by older people - but nothing like what I'm told I'll experince if I move down south.
I would love to live in the south (north carolina, northern florida, tn) But I am just not sure where to begin.
I'd love to look into an areas of NC - ideally a city of less than 100,000 people with good schools and many activities to keep us busy. Sports, theatres, museums, malls, parks are important to us. As well as nothing too pricey or commercialized. I currently work in the insurance industry (not selling; LOL). I don't have to stay in this field though.
My mother is moving with us too and she is retired and looking forward to a warmer climate.
I would like to rent an apartment or duplex for a while until I am sure on a city and most of all a neighborhood.
Thank you for all your help, ideas and suggestions. Please - don't hold back in your comments. I was brutally honest and would like to hear the same.
Thanks again!
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Call me naive or whatever you wish; but I truly was shocked by this.
If you're buying even one iota of that load of crap that these individuals are trying to sell you, then yes, you are truly naive, and they have some real issues to deal with.
Once again, mixed-race/mixed-ethnicity families are a dime-a-dozen all around the country, even in the South. No one is going to care.
I understand that there is racism everywhere - I honestly didn't think it was 'all that' like I was being told - and again - maybe I was/am naive - but I didn't think it was a big deal anymore; thansk for your input! :-)
I have looked at several cities in SC, but was told that SC would not be the best place for me since I am white and my boys are bi-racial. I was told everything from there are still plenty of KKK stores on mainstreet to the fact that bi-racial children and black children are ostrisized (spelling).
If you were told to jump off a bridge, would you do it?
I'm from South Carolina, and I've never seen a klan member, a klan store, or a klan rally. About once every 5 years, they come out in full force (which is about 20 of them) to protest something at the statehouse in Columbia. There are always more cops than klan members, and there are probably 10 times as many anti-klan protesters as there are klan members.
It lasts a few hours, you get to see some funny photographs in the newspaper, and that's about it.
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And that it's not in my or their best interest to live in a state that still freely flies the confederate flag.
You're entitled to your opinion, but IMO the people who fly it don't do so because of race. Regardless, this topic has been beaten to death, and then some.
Thank you for all your help, ideas and suggestions. Please - don't hold back in your comments. I was brutally honest and would like to hear the same.
Thanks again!
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I'd rather not be brutally honest. I'd prefer to try and put myself in your shoes as someone who has been filled with negative stereotypes about southerners. Given that American blacks are internally migrating to the south from every region in America, I'm not sure where the problem is. I've heard that Chicago, Milwaukee and Detroit are some of the most racist cities in America.
Everything people say "about the South" and "about Southerners" is born from some ridiculous stereotypes that seem to still be circulating - mainly from people who do not have a clue and have never lived here.
Did you watch the primaries? Southerners, black and white, are supporting Obama. That should tell you all you need to know.
There are skinheads and nuts spread out all over this country. I have not seen any here in my region, tho. I am in Charlotte, NC.
I am a native of NC and lived in MN (Twin Cities) for about 10 years. I heard more blatantly offensive speech during that time than I've ever heard in my other 30 years in NC. Most of the truly offensive speech was directed at Native Americans. My experience of that area of the Midwest is that it is very white and that people talk tolerance and claim to be superior to the South, but it is just talk. They don't really know many people of color and are uncomfortable with them (with the exception of small areas like where you are and a few areas in the center of big cities). In the South, whatever its faults, there is a large African American population and people live together. I see many interracial couples (and have been part of one, though I'm not now) and it is not at all uncommon. I've never heard the expression "blackstabber" in my life, and I'd be guessing as to what it means, so I won't. Many Northerners are moving to NC, check the stats, so there really is no problem with them. Some people are fighting the "war", but most of them think it was about state's rights and Southern superiority, not race.
If you get past the myths you've heard, you might want to look at one of the smaller cities in the Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill area.
You'll be happy in progessive NC. SC maybe a little less so.
There are many african-americans in SC but also many backward white people (in the countryside at least) who seem to harbor old-time, passed down dislike for the darker skinned people who are so numerous in the state.
SC allows people to live & do like they want to do - ride motorcycles without helmets, etc. A friend's son went to a military high school that didn't allow blacks. Maybe they had 1 in the whole school. It's a more backward state, but it has pretty towns & cities between tha vast farmlands.
NC is more progressive with it's multitudinous (sp?) colleges & universities I think.
Just a quick thought... as I scanned what you say you're looking for in a city, Richmond, Virginia immediately popped into my mind. It's a little further North than you stated you were investigating, but offers a lot of cultural opportunity and is rather diverse overall, as it's not all that far from Washington, D.C.
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